"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Arranging 2nd date with flakey girls?

pete101

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Ok picture the scene you gear yourself up to call a HB for 2nd date.. she's busy out somewhere so within 30 secs tells u that 'can she call u later?'

u know full well she's flakey so won't call u so feel inclined to seal the deal there and then.

change the scenario slightly. say u call she dont pick up then she calls u straight back but says the above.

within that time constraint should u try to seal the agreement for the next date?

in my experience i feel pressured and she gives u a 'maybe thursday or sunday' type answer.. forcing u to have to confirm again.

should u just say literally.. 'well give me a definite day now' if she doesn't just say you'll catch up with her later?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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wjh

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If she gives you wishy-washy answers, then you have to lead with a date she can only say "yes" or "no" to. If she gives you an excuse or reasons, she's just trying to be nice. She's not very interested or she's retarded. At that point you have to next her or make her chase you with concrete decisions.

Your call *ring, ring*
She picks up.

Her: "Hello?"
You: "Hey what's up? It's Pete101"
Her: "Hey, Nothing..."
You: "Alright, Listen I'm going to be in your neighborhood at 9PM Thursday, why don't you come with me to bar X for a couple of drinks?"
Her: "Um, call me Thursday, maybe I can go, if not then next week some time"
You: "Ok, sounds good. I have to go, talk to you later, bye"

Then you hang up, call her Thursday and say:

You: "Hey what's up?"
Her: "Nothing..."
You: "Cool, you ready to go out tonight?" (Assuming you don't have plans already)
Her: "I can't I have to X, Y, or Z"

If she doesn't offer to reschedule with concrete plans, then you next her. You already gave her a second chance. She's either low-interest or retarded. Either which are not ideal. DJs don't date retards or girls with low-interest. And the phone call continues...

You: "Oh, no worries, anyway, call me next week if you want to grab a drink, I have to run! bye!"
Her: "OK I will!" (she won't) "bye!"

*click*

Then you next her.

If she calls back, it doesn't really matter what you do. At this point you can just use her for practice, but don't get your hopes up. Chances are you'll just end up spinning your wheels.

I highly recommend you read anti-dump's machine.
 

pete101

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the thing is.. it doesn't usually flow that way.. it's 'hey how you doing?'
she chats for a few secs then springs on you she's out/busy etc etc.. maybe just to get u off the phone whatever..

at that point you've got about 30 secs to seal the deal for the next date.. cos 1 she won't call u back.. 2 u dont want to have to call again few days later and have the same BS scenario..

so what do you say when she tells u 'im blah blah right now.. can i speak to you later?'

at that point i feel i should seal the next date? how though?

if she gives you an answer which is not clear cut then...?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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wjh

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I know the conversations don't flow like that verbatim but don't let the conversations waver. You do that by leading. Ask her out as close to the way I described it. Set a date, time, and place. Anything other than a YES is a NO.
 

wjh

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Save all the talking for when you're actually out on a date. No sense in talking to her if you're wasting your time. In effective marketing you always to want creat a sense of urgency. Ask her out, you don't have time to chit-chat about nonsense, and move on to another girl or rock climbing or whatever.
 

Igetit!

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What I don't understand is, why don't you just do whatever it was that you did in order to get the 1st date? Look, we all know that women are emotional,and the fact that you even had a first date meant that you were obviously able to generate attraction in her towards you,right? So do it again.
Remember back to the encounter where you first approached her and got her number. You attracted her enough to give you her number and go out on a first date. So whatever you did at the beginning, do it again. Also, there is another thing you want to consider. If you got her on a first date, but then all of the sudden,she seems to be avoiding you,then more than likely the date (at least from her point of view) didn't go as well as you thought.
 

ready123

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Igetit! said:
What I don't understand is, why don't you just do whatever it was that you did in order to get the 1st date? Look, we all know that women are emotional,and the fact that you even had a first date meant that you were obviously able to generate attraction in her towards you,right? So do it again.
Remember back to the encounter where you first approached her and got her number. You attracted her enough to give you her number and go out on a first date. So whatever you did at the beginning, do it again. Also, there is another thing you want to consider. If you got her on a first date, but then all of the sudden,she seems to be avoiding you,then more than likely the date (at least from her point of view) didn't go as well as you thought.
:up:
 

wjh

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Igetit! said:
What I don't understand is, why don't you just do whatever it was that you did in order to get the 1st date? Look, we all know that women are emotional,and the fact that you even had a first date meant that you were obviously able to generate attraction in her towards you,right? So do it again.
Remember back to the encounter where you first approached her and got her number. You attracted her enough to give you her number and go out on a first date. So whatever you did at the beginning, do it again. Also, there is another thing you want to consider. If you got her on a first date, but then all of the sudden,she seems to be avoiding you,then more than likely the date (at least from her point of view) didn't go as well as you thought.
Or the first date went exactly the way she thought it would, which was, dinner with a boring nice-guy. Maybe she was hoping to be awed by this young man, but she wasn't, so she really doesn't care about entertaining his advances.

Don't assume that a girl who goes out on a date with you has high-interest, or any interest for that matter.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Igetit!

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Sorry, but I have to assume that there is somewhat some interest. There has to be. I can understand a woman not being interested and still giving you her number, I can see that. But her giving you her number AND making time out of her so called busy schedule to go out on a date with you? Nope, not seeing that. That would be just plain stupid. If there were zero interest from the start,why would she even go out on a first date? Why not just start flaking from the get-go instead of going out on a date, and then start flaking. I think there was an intial interest on her part. I think her peaked her interest. Then, while they were ON the date, her interest started to decline. That's why now,whenever he calls her she keeps giving him these excuses.
 

wjh

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Igetit! said:
That would be just plain stupid.
Take note: we're dealing with women.

Maybe you're right, but many girls go on first dates with guys with whom they have very low, low interest. I simply believe in not wasting your time; whther it's low-interest on her part or a girl without proper brain function.
 

ready123

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wjh said:
Maybe you're right, but many girls go on first dates with guys with whom they have very low, low interest.
unless they're golddiggers, I rarely see this happen. most girls don't like going through the torture of spending time with a wierdo

if there's no attraction, she's not gonna go out with you

and if she doesn't go for the second date, it's probably because you blew yourself out on the first
 
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