"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Are you feeling the pressure to "settle down"?

S

speakeasy

Master Don Juan
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For you older DJs, like 30+ especially, I'm sure you see more and more of the people in your social network getting into serious relationships and talking about marriage. More people sort of giving up on the exciting and active life of the single person and sort of settling down.

I admit peer pressure can be strong and you can start to feel like you're being left behind sometimes. I even wonder occasionally what I'm doing at 33 trying to learn game and still going out to bars and clubs. How do you guys deal with some of these issues?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Warrior74

Master Don Juan
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No...my friends are just now hitting their first divorces and are looking to me for guidance now. I'm in the south, so if you're not married by 30, people look at you strange.
 
T

The Champ

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Only if you find the right girl with all the knowledge obtained at this site.

Only when your gut tells you it's right... if your gut doesn't agree... DIVORCE is imminent.
 
Colossus

Colossus

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I think part of the 'settling down' desire is just a natural part of getting older, and much of it is peer-pressure/culture. A lot of folks (especially women) like to covertly shame the unmarried.

I don't feel any pressure. I wont say I never entertain thoughts of 'settling down'; and by that I mean settling into a certain part of the country and getting property, and a long-term gf. That's normal and natural, and I don't think we should be shaming DJs for having this desire. What I think is egregious is subscribing to the idea that if you don't "settle" into one woman by X age, you are behind the curve or there is something wrong. That's utter b.s. "Settling down", as it is understood colloquially, implies you are settling for a particular woman because that's what is expected of you.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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S

sodbuster

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Since I'm divorced, I don't get much of it. But some, all women have a divorced friend that they think I need to meet[great like I want to deal with someone elses kids and fund their college too].
 
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