"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Are we just bulls***ing ourselves?

JB101

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The epiphany I had today was, "it's time to wake up". When it comes to worrying about approaching, or what some girl thinks about you, we're fooling ourselves.

Why are our egos so fragile? Two more US Soldiers were killed today in Iraq. Al Qaeda's number two man is talking about having suitcase nukes. And we're worrying over what a girl thinks about us!?!

What in the hell are we doing to ourselves? It's so absurd, it's laughable.

It's time to live life and enjoy ourselves and be free of everyone elses opinions. In the end, these opinions aren't even going to matter. They are so trivial in the grand scheme of things.

The world isn't analyzing our every word and every action.
 
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"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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LowPlainsDrifter

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JB, how sad life becomes when we let any terrible event, whether on a personal or global scale prevent us from enjoying it after we've gone through a reasonable period of grief and recovery.
I agree that this DJ stuff seems "trivial" next to terrorism and other nastiness, but those are not reasons to stop pursuing women.
The ultimate goal of almost every man is to meet and marry their ideal woman, or as close as they can get to their ideal. How terrible it would be if we put all of that aside whenever a building blows up or a new threat emerges. We go on. Life goes on. Every time we stop our pursuits of "unimportant" things, we hand the evil ones a victory, because that's exactly what they want us to do. In fact, every time we do something to make our own lives happier or better that doesn't involve hurting or exploiting others, we make the world a better place - one person at a time. In my calculus, simply not being a burden to others is a step toward helping humanity as a whole.
Everyone should find an appropriate balance between seeking the satisfaction of their own self-interests, and doing something positive to help the world. But getting down about the world isn't going to help, and it only brings the darkness a bit closer.
 

WestCoaster

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You can apply that to anything in life

Actually, you can apply world politics to anywhere in life.

Did you know in Rawanda more than 800,000 people were killed and many people had their limbs cut off and that's still happening. Children are still being butchered.

In the Congo, a brutal civil war is killing thousands and the death toll there is in the 100's of thousands.

There's brutality, sadness, everywhere, in our country and across this world. You can apply that to any situation: "I shouldn't care if my favorite sports team wins because of 9/11." And, "I shouldn't care about my love life because of Iraq."

It's great to have perspective and think about world issues, that doesn't nulify that we should care about other aspects of our life.

And if these world issues are so important to you, why are you even on this message board?

Always cracks me up -- about once a month we're told this site sucks and we're all stupid or something. Yet, the people criticizing us are on the board.

I think CNN.com is still up and maybe you should go there.
 

JB101

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My point was to see the world as it is. Approaching someone becomes a non issue. You don't need to stress about it or magnify what others think about you.

Live your life to the fullest, that's the bottom line. Perhaps the post wasn't worded like that.

It has nothing to do with not approaching women or not enjoying anything.

Absolutely, enjoy every moment. Carpe Diem.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Trapspringer

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I agree that this DJ stuff seems "trivial" next to terrorism and other nastiness, but those are not reasons to stop pursuing women.

I think you missed the finest point in his thread. he is not saying that DJing is a waste of time. I think he is saying that those who have problems approaching women is making a big problem that they are creating for themselves and this is a very minor problem compared to the more nasty problems that exist in the world.

I agree with him on this. We have so much we do not have to worry about in this country but we use that extra room for comfort and relief to only make other problems for oursleves.

Clubbing and going out to meet others regularly is a luxury. In other words, stop worrying about your fears about women and just be glad you don't have a daily fear of your neighborhood being blown up. Use that relief to just relax in other areas of life.


But because life is so comfortable, we have way too much time on our hands to think about our problems. And create problems that don't exist.
The reason why money can't buy many people happiness. Once the know that their bills will always be paid, they only put more focus into other worries other problems.
 
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