"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Are we flirting - do girls flirt like this? How to ask her out?

AverageHero

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Hi,

I work with a girl who I love. We have this thing we do where we tease each other, but pretend to do it in a serious way. While out for a few drinks at a party, we told each other that sometimes we think the other is being serious.

We both are only playing with each other. She said sometimes she thinks I hate her! I think she is AMAZING and told her I think she is cool. Anyway we joked about it, and later on she said that I had glitter on our face from kissing each other (we didn't kiss, but I got glitter on my face haha) to a friend.

Does it sound as if we are flirting? How do I ask her out, but not look like a geek/or needy?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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AverageHero

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Basically asked her out but her sister is in her apartment for a few days after coming home from the other side of the world.

My crush says she can't leave her sister alone. I was of the impression that if a girl liked you she would jump at the chance to go out with you.

It's a genuine excuse, but dang man it hurts. Should I give her another chance?
 

AverageHero

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Thanks man, appreciate the response. I suppose she did validate herself to me by giving a genuine excuse upfront (I know it's genuine because she was excited to have her sister back for a few weeks)

How does this leave me though? She knows I asked her out, and must like her, so do I cool the jets for a while? Will she respect me more/less for asking her out?
 

Fela Kuti

Senior Don Juan
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why can't she leave the sister alone? her sister isn't 5 year old is she? and a date would only take a few hours, right? I don't get this.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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lolwut

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stop trying to figure what every little thing she says or does actually means. half of the time women doesn't even know what they want. and what they say or even do can be different from what they want. They are controlled by emotions which can change from 1 moment to the next.

If you like her and want to give it a second shot, i don't think what anyone says in this forum is gonna stop you from asking her out again anyway.

her excuse may be legit, or it may not, who gives a ****?

Ask her again when her sister leaves, what do you have to lose?
If she says no or makes another excuse then forget her and move on.

If she meant to reject you in the 1st place then you lose nothing by getting rejected again. But if she had a legit excuse than you may be missing out by overthinking.
 

AverageHero

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Hi everone OP here,

Thanks for all replies. Turns out her sister went to a friends house but my 'crush' didn't contact me to tell me. The only solace I'm taking from it is that she is very very shy, and conservative - but that's all.

I suppose there could be a million reasons as to why I wasn't told, and I shouldn't take it personally but how and ever.

I suppose I should just leave her be, as the ball is in her court if she wants to do anything ya know.

Another piece of solace I suppose is that I had the b*ll**ks to ask her out face-to-face and while sober (however nervous it probably looked).

It's tough...
 
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