"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Are high flakes common with online dating?

Knight of Roses

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 17, 2018
Messages
296
Reaction score
276
Age
40
I've usually gone through spurts with online dating in the past several years. I usually go for several months where I try to spin as many plates as I can, then take a break, then come back to the game. Something strange about this time around, I've noticed an exceedingly high number of flakes and lack of manners.

I usually run a basic script when I match with a girl on an online app; I chit chat for 1-2 messages, ask her to happy hour, do number exchange, and set up the meet. Same formula I've used in the past. Seems this time around, women are flaking exceptionally high percentages. Some right after the match, some mid-way during conversation. Some even after number exchange and date has been set.

I'm not really offended, it's part of the game, you take it as it comes. But, just wanting to see if others have had similar experiences in the past several months. Maybe something in the water?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

nismo-4

Moderator
Joined
Jan 31, 2005
Messages
4,439
Reaction score
1,143
Location
From New Orleans, Louisiana to Atlanta, Georgia!!!
Consider how many online platforms women are on.

Any given woman has 15 minimum guys hitting on her.

A woman can drop you for having too much, not enough, or none of something. Even something like owning a PS4, cheering for Alabama, or being a Gemini can hurt you. Even not being a criminal or millionaire can hurt you.

It's all about timing and what the woman wants at the time you talk to her. Maybe they see you're about your business and won't be an orbiter/ just friends/ emotional tampon (a beta cuck) and they need orbiters.

Online, you gotta show you're first place. The goal is sex first, then anything else. No orbiters.

This happens because of too many options, and international options at that. The one strike policy will help greatly.
 

HankHill

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2018
Messages
817
Reaction score
575
Age
51
Yep very common nowadays. This is what a lot of guys who aren't on OLD don't get. The game has changed a lot in the last 2yrs but you just gotta keep on truck'n. Funny thing is I've had women b*tched and complained about how OLD sucks because they also get flaked on, ghosted on, asked for sex on the first msg/date etc. The same women turned around and did similar stuff, it's pure madness if you try to make any sense of it, so don't even bother.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
17,586
Reaction score
11,948
Location
DFW, TX
Yep very common nowadays. This is what a lot of guys who aren't on OLD don't get. The game has changed a lot in the last 2yrs but you just gotta keep on truck'n. Funny thing is I've had women b*tched and complained about how OLD sucks because they also get flaked on, ghosted on, asked for sex on the first msg/date etc. The same women turned around and did similar stuff, it's pure madness if you try to make any sense of it, so don't even bother.
Think with your c0cks and youll do fine.
 

Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
17,571
Reaction score
6,353
Age
50
Location
midwestern cow field 40
This is why. No real connection made. It's just a date with a stranger. Nothing off their back if they cancel/no show.

This is why I chat them up a little beforehand. I don't do it for the get to know you. It is to separate myself from other men. Be different, tickle their funny bone, get them intrigued. They show up 100% of the time.

I have a zero flake rate.

Zero.
Well said, I agree very much. I always thought the consensus advice of minimal contact as showing a scarcity of options, as in a 'I hope I don't fvck this up' kind of frame. If you have options, like women do, then screening a few of them out is not a loss. It is saving yourself time and effort.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Knight of Roses

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 17, 2018
Messages
296
Reaction score
276
Age
40
This is why. No real connection made. It's just a date with a stranger. Nothing off their back if they cancel/no show.

This is why I chat them up a little beforehand. I don't do it for the get to know you. It is to separate myself from other men. Be different, tickle their funny bone, get them intrigued. They show up 100% of the time.

I have a zero flake rate.

Zero.
What's your opinion on the thought that too much talking also leads to flakes? I mean, I've had situations in where girls have just left the conversation mid-way through before I even ask for number or set up a date. Does that happen to you as well or no?
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,062
Reaction score
3,617
Age
33
Location
Sweden
It's not about how much you talk. The number of paragraphs.... sentences…. completely irrelevant.

It's all about content. Feel. Emotion. Delivery. Persona....

View attachment 1853

Chat chat chat, yada yada yada.... then this:

View attachment 1854

Any woman you can get to this point will show up.

You don't get there by "setting the date"; in and out as fast as possible.

You have to give them a reason.
The fact that she is answering in complete sentences is already very remarkable, the double texting too. Whether that's to do with her, or what you make her do, I can't say. But women who do this have been the only ones I've had any success with on OLD, as far as I can remember.
 
Last edited:

The Duke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 4, 2008
Messages
6,524
Reaction score
11,450
Every girl I have spent some time talking with on the phone and or texting before the date resulted in a flake rate of 5%. The girls that I barely texted/talked to before the date had a flake rate of 30%. Put some thought into what girls you are really interested in and compatible with and spend the time talking to them before hand and you will get much better results. A little upfront investment also makes it easier to have sex sooner! Figure out what works for you and what doesn't, adjust your game/style/mode of operation to achieve the best results and go for it.
 
Last edited:

HankHill

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2018
Messages
817
Reaction score
575
Age
51
For what it's worth, the flake rate for me is higher if the date is too far out (like 5+ days). If it's in the next two or three days zero flake rate.

I just had a flake today, meaning we were meeting tonight. I talked to her a day ago, all good. Last night I sent a message and no response, and this is a woman who liked me first, started the convo first, funny banter the first few days...there's just no explanation sometimes other than SQUIRREL!!
 

Doctor Europeo

Moderator
Joined
Mar 6, 2017
Messages
4,415
Reaction score
4,800
Location
Mexico
Very good advice in here. You can also consider doublebooking or invite them to places you were going to anyway.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

Knight of Roses

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 17, 2018
Messages
296
Reaction score
276
Age
40
For what it's worth, the flake rate for me is higher if the date is too far out (like 5+ days). If it's in the next two or three days zero flake rate.

I just had a flake today, meaning we were meeting tonight. I talked to her a day ago, all good. Last night I sent a message and no response, and this is a woman who liked me first, started the convo first, funny banter the first few days...there's just no explanation sometimes other than SQUIRREL!!
Yeah, same issue. I use Bumble where girl initiates conversation, replies really quickly to my messages, and then all of a sudden just stops texting. And you're like "Wtf?"
 

HankHill

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 27, 2018
Messages
817
Reaction score
575
Age
51
Yeah, same issue. I use Bumble where girl initiates conversation, replies really quickly to my messages, and then all of a sudden just stops texting. And you're like "Wtf?"
Really sorry about taking your matches bro lol! Seriously, you know women on Bumble have just so many options they just can't decide. Whomever is the flavor of the hr is who she's replying to.
 

sangheilios

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 25, 2018
Messages
2,630
Reaction score
2,730
This has probably already been mentioned on here, but you need to consider that a woman is probably talking to a dozen or more other guys on dating sites and apps. I wouldn't take any of this personally, though this is the reason why I feel like approaching and meeting women in the real world is far better.
 
Top