An example of a pattern-like approach : I'm sure that you, like me, have had some really interesting experiences in your life. You know experiences that were incredibly fascinating and absorbing, like maybe when you were a kid and you went to a museum and you just got lost in wonder and delight at what you were seeing. If you were to share a memory about one of your most interesting experiences, a person you met perhaps, or a place you've been, or something you've learned that still holds a deep interest
for you, what would it be?
Another pattern-like approach.: Excuse me (to get her to stop) I just wanted to say thankyou.
Her curiosity bells just went DING. She'll almost inevitably ask why, though it is ok if she doesn't. Move into standard mirroring and rapport building techniques as you continue
Have you ever had one of those days where, you find yourself feeling sort of aloof you're not really happy,
but not really sad either you just feel like your adrift. Then suddenly you find you bump into somebody with
an incredibly warm and beautiful smile that just makes you feel wonderful for the rest of the day?
She will almost surely smile more at this point, or give some degree of positive response.
So, I just had to thank you for brightening up my day Though, you know it would be a shame if this is the
last time I'll see that wonderful smile what's your name?
An example of approaching girls in cafeterias with some aspects of patterning.ASF:
HOW TO APROACH WITH GREAT BODY LANGUAGE:
• Walk up from a direction where they can see you coming (I like them to feel like I walked up to them confidently, not like I'm trying to sneak up on them or trick them).
• Sit down while you say something with a big smile and like you've known them your whole life. It doesn't much matter what you say, but if you say something interesting it makes it easier to continue the conversation (now they have had a state change and are wondering if they know you).
• Make interesting conversation (use patterns if you know them) while mirroring them.
Tell them a little
bit about yourself then SMOOTHLY number close.
M: So, How was youR day (sit down)
H: Good how was yours (This is a very typical response if you were smooth with the intro).
M: My day was awesome so far (try to match her outlook, if she looks completely down try pretty good).I
had a great day at work, and then one of my closest friends that I hadn't talked to in a while called me. You
know how you can just talk to someone and no how long it's been you just feel this great connection with
them
H: That's cool, I have a friend like that
M: Someone you can really trust, who always makes you feel good to talk to?
H: Yeah, I've known her forever
M: I have to go, but I've really enjoyed this conversation, why don't you give me your number and we can talk again...
How was your day, pacing and rapport building. : If there's nothing particularly interesting
about the environment in which you find yourselves, the first sentence or two gives you the perfect opportunity to pace her (this is more what I'd be tempted to do at a party or some social gathering).
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Example 1
You walk across to her and, genuinely interested, ask: So, how was your day?
In a fraction of a second she flickers through the events of the day, smiles, and says Great! Her smile is
infectious and you find yours matching it as you reply. Excellent! So was mine. What did you do?
She's had a great day. You've had a great day. She feels a small (at this stage) degree of rapport and should have little problem sharing her good mood. This leads her into talking about what she did to have
such a great day, a list of sentences in which you should find any number of conversational hooks to bite on.
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Example 2
You walk across to her and, genuinely interested, ask: So, how was your day?
In a fraction of a second she flickers through the events of the day, sighs, and says Awful. Her sadness is
infectious and you feel an empathic frown flow across your face as you ask Oh, what happened?
This then thereotically leads her into talking about what happened, and gives you the opportunity to show
her that you can bring her from a pisspoor mood into a happy one. Hear her out. Whereas to fix up our bad
moods we (i.e. men) usually look for solutions to the cause, women tend to share their feelings. Once she's
unloaded the baggage, you've got rapport. Time to turn her mood around and get her happy. Not easy, but
attainable.
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for you, what would it be?
Another pattern-like approach.: Excuse me (to get her to stop) I just wanted to say thankyou.
Her curiosity bells just went DING. She'll almost inevitably ask why, though it is ok if she doesn't. Move into standard mirroring and rapport building techniques as you continue
Have you ever had one of those days where, you find yourself feeling sort of aloof you're not really happy,
but not really sad either you just feel like your adrift. Then suddenly you find you bump into somebody with
an incredibly warm and beautiful smile that just makes you feel wonderful for the rest of the day?
She will almost surely smile more at this point, or give some degree of positive response.
So, I just had to thank you for brightening up my day Though, you know it would be a shame if this is the
last time I'll see that wonderful smile what's your name?
An example of approaching girls in cafeterias with some aspects of patterning.ASF:
HOW TO APROACH WITH GREAT BODY LANGUAGE:
• Walk up from a direction where they can see you coming (I like them to feel like I walked up to them confidently, not like I'm trying to sneak up on them or trick them).
• Sit down while you say something with a big smile and like you've known them your whole life. It doesn't much matter what you say, but if you say something interesting it makes it easier to continue the conversation (now they have had a state change and are wondering if they know you).
• Make interesting conversation (use patterns if you know them) while mirroring them.
Tell them a little
bit about yourself then SMOOTHLY number close.
M: So, How was youR day (sit down)
H: Good how was yours (This is a very typical response if you were smooth with the intro).
M: My day was awesome so far (try to match her outlook, if she looks completely down try pretty good).I
had a great day at work, and then one of my closest friends that I hadn't talked to in a while called me. You
know how you can just talk to someone and no how long it's been you just feel this great connection with
them
H: That's cool, I have a friend like that
M: Someone you can really trust, who always makes you feel good to talk to?
H: Yeah, I've known her forever
M: I have to go, but I've really enjoyed this conversation, why don't you give me your number and we can talk again...
How was your day, pacing and rapport building. : If there's nothing particularly interesting
about the environment in which you find yourselves, the first sentence or two gives you the perfect opportunity to pace her (this is more what I'd be tempted to do at a party or some social gathering).
-
Example 1
You walk across to her and, genuinely interested, ask: So, how was your day?
In a fraction of a second she flickers through the events of the day, smiles, and says Great! Her smile is
infectious and you find yours matching it as you reply. Excellent! So was mine. What did you do?
She's had a great day. You've had a great day. She feels a small (at this stage) degree of rapport and should have little problem sharing her good mood. This leads her into talking about what she did to have
such a great day, a list of sentences in which you should find any number of conversational hooks to bite on.
-
Example 2
You walk across to her and, genuinely interested, ask: So, how was your day?
In a fraction of a second she flickers through the events of the day, sighs, and says Awful. Her sadness is
infectious and you feel an empathic frown flow across your face as you ask Oh, what happened?
This then thereotically leads her into talking about what happened, and gives you the opportunity to show
her that you can bring her from a pisspoor mood into a happy one. Hear her out. Whereas to fix up our bad
moods we (i.e. men) usually look for solutions to the cause, women tend to share their feelings. Once she's
unloaded the baggage, you've got rapport. Time to turn her mood around and get her happy. Not easy, but
attainable.
-