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Approaching girls...is there an easy way?

A27

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Hey Everyone

I need help on approaching girls. It's probabily the only reason why i don't have any girls in my life at the moment. I always freeze up when i see a girl i like and after overthinking bout why i should not approach her, i chicken out.
It's only afterwards when i start beating myself up for chicken out (which doesn't do any good for my self-confidence).

So anyways, i decided instead of letting this cycle just repeat over and over again, that i would force myself to approach someone asap. This leads me to a few questions about approaching girls.

Is it better to approach girls when they have shown a slight hint of interest or are cold approaches better?

Is it better to be direct to girls (basically saying "i like you..whats your number?") or to have some small talk first?

Any advice would be great
 

Slickster

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Chat them up first. Unless you are super good looking then why would she give you her number?

A little small talk, try to make her laugh a little and go for the number.

There is no secret way to make it easier. You just keep challenging yourself until you are comfortable with doing cold approaches.

Something you can do is practice approaching strangers to improve your skills. Don't just focus on women. Talk to everybody. It works wonders.
 

Doc Freezy

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the secret is to do it first with girls you dont want to sleep with, try fatties and ugly girls, then slowly work your way up the ladder. You wont feel bad being rejected by Rosie o'donnel would you? So go hunt down those wounded zebra
 
U

user43770

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Doc Freezy said:
the secret is to do it first with girls you dont want to sleep with, try fatties and ugly girls, then slowly work your way up the ladder. You wont feel bad being rejected by Rosie o'donnel would you? So go hunt down those wounded zebra

Why not start out approaching women that you're attracted to? Who knows, you might get lucky.

Is there an easy way to approach women? Sure, if you're drunk. Other than that, it's pretty much always a chore. The rejections get easier with practice. One big thing to remember: don't let it bum you out when you get turned down. Learn from it and get back out there; it's a numbers game, playa.
 

horaholic

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Doc Freezy said:
the secret is to do it first with girls you dont want to sleep with, try fatties and ugly girls, then slowly work your way up the ladder. You wont feel bad being rejected by Rosie o'donnel would you? So go hunt down those wounded zebra

I dont know about that. If you go get blown out by a bunch of ugg's it might hurt your confidence.

The only way is to dull your sense of rejection by doing it over and over again. Do the sosuave bootcamp. Thats what it does. You work your way up from eye contact, to starting conversations with strangers.
 

The Karate Kid

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I always make eye contact before I approach. If you keep it until she breaks away, it instantly shows confidence, which she will like. Smiling is great too. She will most likely smile back at you.

a great little tip- approach women at a place you feel comfortable at to get your confidence up. People always think I have to approach at a bar or a club, and yes, those are good places, but most people dont feel completely comfortable doing it there.

So if you pickup women at places you feel very comfortable/confident at, this will increase your confidence, which will make approaching at places out of your comfort zone much easier, which equals more women to meet.
 

Tom Stall

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all good points:

only go for girls you want. if you go for uggos, being knocked back by them will hurt your self confidence

do it many times, rejection will dull down. i've had many a time a girl walk away from me at a club "see ya", but that would have been the 3rd or 4th girl i approach, and i would always get a number off at least two girls, without having to lower my bar. point it, do it many times

try to have some interest signs first, it helps, but not nessesary
 

I.A.F.Y.B.

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There is one simple key to know before approaching a girl.

You must make eye contact and smile at her. If she see's that and smiles back then, looks away quickly. Then, you go in for the kill. If she does not react in a interested way. Move on cause she aint interested.

Only approach women who give you some sort of good signal. Or else you will approach a girl who isnt interested and turn you down. And we dont want to get turned down do we? So, go for the girl who is smiling and looking back at you.
 

Alextheegreat

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I received this information not to long ago, I figured now is the time to pass it on, But I am still in this program its called the Don Juan boot camp. You can find this by clicking DJ Bible link at the lower left hand of the screen. This is an 8 Week course, it should help with your freezing since it takes baby steps to get to where you want. So far I just completed Week 1, it was actually enjoy able, I just started to say Hi to random strangers. I felt it was easy before I went, but then I went and did it and it actually didn't come on as easy...but after doing the Hello's ect for 25 I felt like the king of the world! So again my fellow Don Juan, take my advice, well take information I am passing onto you, do the training, then ask questions.

Guys your answers are great, but when you start new and all, well you can't exactly do that haha.
 

ALPHAROMEO

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Kamikaze

use the KAMIKAZE method
just jump on the first chick you see like a bat out of hell
if she s an uggo ask for quick of info cut it short and bail out

GO KAMIKAZE:kick:

approach 5 CHICKS in 10 MINUTES
 

xdreamz

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approaching is pretty much the beginning of getting to know someone. is there an easy way into it? practice makes everything easy and natural.

go head and force yourself to do it. don't wait for indicators of interest, but if you feel like she's interested why wouldn't you approach????

girls do like direct blunt stuff like saying i'm attracted to you this and that but you have to make them earn it. you don't want to small talk. but i use small talk as a way to break awkward silences and then find some way to attract.
 

Drewskie

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ALPHAROMEO said:
use the KAMIKAZE method
just jump on the first chick you see like a bat out of hell
if she s an uggo ask for quick of info cut it short and bail out

GO KAMIKAZE:kick:

approach 5 CHICKS in 10 MINUTES
Kamikaze eh? Never heard of that.
 

Bobby Rio

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Use an opinion opener...

starts a converstion 75% of the time.

Its so easy.

If you don't feel comfortable using other people's openers- use your own.

If you don't mind using other peoples - there are hundreds of free openers available at freepuaopeners.com

Everytime Im stuck- I simply turn to the nearest girl and bust out an opinion opener...

And I always think later how easy it is...
 

ALPHAROMEO

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Alpha

ask the chick " where is such or such street ( anyo can ask for directions
say u r a FRENCHIE u r flatvisting u don t know th area

while she s tryong to tell where the street is , pull out a town map , point to it ( u don t have to say anything that s the breauty of it

during the exchage NEG her if you can ( but u don t have to )


THANK HER AND INVITE FOR A COFFEE AT THE WEEKEND
exchange digits the NEIL STRAUSS S WAY ( see his scd bk chapter 20

PS YOU GIVE HER VALUER BY HAVING HER FIND THE DIFFICULT LOCATION

YOU LABEL BY TELLING WHAT AN AWESOMELY HELPFUL CHICK SHE IS

YOU R ALPHA COS YOU TAVELEDE TO THE U S AS A FRENCHMAN
 

sanoj

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Being super drunk works like a charm for me. Being super drunk in bed the same night does'nt :rolleyes:
 

Drewskie

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sanoj said:
Being super drunk works like a charm for me. Being super drunk in bed the same night does'nt :rolleyes:
You have to be drunk to approach? I guess that works.
 

Allurre

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1. Don't let a woman's beauty get to you. When you can train your mind to value her internal characteristics more than her appearance, you will no longer freeze in the presence of a good looking woman.

2. Before you can approach women and strike up a conversation, LEARN to be a social person first.
 
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