Approached a girl in the gym.

[Mr.Suave]

So this is my second approach and still no number. I did the first last month, she was in a hurry so me being a bit nervous said goodbye instead of getting her number. Lol.

Anyways, this time I think I asked too early. So this hb8 is sitting on a bench resting, shes around 16-17 yrs old. Approached her, told her im gonna use it. She looked at me, smiles and left. So after that, went to her and this how the conversation went.

Me: Do you always go here?

Hb8: We usually do if we dont have class

Me: oh.. what time do you usually go here?

Hb8: same time during monday, sometimes on thursday and earlier if friday.

Me: What school do you go to?

Hb8: *name of school*

Me: and what course do you take?

Hb8: some acronym that I didnt understand since the music is a bit loud.

Me: can you explain to me whats that course?

Hb8: its hard to explain but I wanted to be a flight attendant.

Me: oh cool. Whats your name?

Hb8: Lhia

Me: Im Mr.suave *went for a handshake* nice to meet you lhia

Hb8: nice to meet you too Mr.suave

Then I left and workout again and im done after this so im leaving. Shes back on the threadmill again so I rest for 5 minutes waiting for her friend to finish talking but I have to go now so I approached them while at the threadmill talking. This is how it went. (Mind you, she cant stop smiling everytime I approach and talk to her and the conversation is just very quick)

Me: hey lhia im leaving now so im getting your number first

Hb8: what?*surprised and smiling again* I dont have a load yet. And her friend smiling too

Me: I have to go now so give me your number

Hb8: I dont have a phone

Me: I know you have a phone so tell me if you dont want to give it to me

Hb8: im not a good texter im boring

I left after like its nothing

 

[TheException]

Too many questions man. This is the classic "interview"....it feels like to her she is interviewing for a job.

A good tip that I read years ago was to turn every question into a statement if possible. Try to add some fun and excitement to the conversation. Be playful.

Instead of this...."and what course do you take".....say "I bet you're going to school to be a teacher...you got that look".

 

[sylvester the cat]

lol. credit to you for having the balls. personally i wouldn't approach where i see people on a regular basis because of a very bad work place experience but each to their own.

first part comes across as an interrogation almost rather than a natural conversation. your interest in boning this girl and not much more is apparent. an if it's apparent to me, it was almost definitely apparent to her.

second part you didn't create enough rapport through your initial interrogation to justify getting her number so she is sh1t testing you. you veered into creep territory by telling her you know she has a phone and ordering her to tell you if she doesn't want to give it to you. you already know she doesn't want to give it to you so you should have just dropped it there.

 

[Mr.Suave]

First of all, thanks for the replies. I should put more personality on my conversations into which I had none. Seriously though, I need to be more relax, maybe more practice. What do you mean by **** testing me sylvester? And about the phone.. who doesnt have a goddamn phone! thats bs.

Any tips more? Sample conversation on my case? How could I apply kino while shes sitting resting and Im standing? What would I do incase I see her again?

 

[Don_Dom]

The phone thing was her way of telling you she wasn't interested. You pressed it and she re-emphasized it with the not being good at texting thing. They really can be lovely sometimes, but look at the bright side...She let you down easy and didn't do what a lot of them do...give you her number then blow you off later when you contact her or, worse, toy with you and flake on you when you try to set up a date. It seems kind of b1tchy but, really, she did you a favor by handling it this way. I would rather know there's low/no interest right away than waste more time on her just to get tooled with later, wouldn't you? As you get more practice you will get better at picking up on these things as they come up.

But good on you for giving it a shot and being cool about it when she shot you down. As the old ads used to say, never let them see you sweat. Rejection happens at all levels of game. Not every woman is going to be interested in every guy they talk to. Just don't let it phase you or discourage you because its all part of it. It's a game. Shake it off, laugh it off, smile, and move on to the next one.

Keep at it. The more practice you get, the easier it gets and the better results you will have overall. Practice, practice, practice.

 

[MillionBillionaire]

She was spift testing you to see if you were an alpha or not. You were not.

The only thing that could have saved you at that moment was prolly having a Lamborghini that you own pull up, or a buncha hot babes come at you from out of nowhere like your Justin Bieber.

Then you would have gotten her number if she said she didn't have a phone.

But your just like me so your here on these forums lol.

 

[Masculinity]

The other guys already gave you great advice. You are at the beginning of an awesome journey being only 17. I would suggest watching some videos online of how other guys pick up girls or making friends with guys at your school who are already good with women (some videos ca be unrealistic). Other than that, just approach, approach, and learn.

 

[gravityeyelids]

like the others have said, the important thing is that you're approaching. It's VERY scary at first. But if you do it constantly you become numb to it.

One very important point: YOU ARE GOING TO BE REJECTED DOZENS OF TIMES. This is just how it is. Accept it. I'm not saying to go into this expecting failure. Go into it as a learning experience not a results-oriented approach. Your goal is not to get the number or even get laid. Honestly a number doesn't mean sh!t if she's not interested. Your goal is to repeat this and improve your approaching to the point where you dont care as much.

Regarding day approaches...i like to come in under the radar a bit and just make some comment. Try to open over your shoulder. What I mean is that you don't want to walk straight up to her and start talking unless you're doing a very direct approach, such as "you're cute". Get within her general area, and pretend you hardly notice her. For example, you're at Target and see a cutie shopping. Walk near her and pretend you're looking at something on the shelf and make some humorous or friendly comment without even looking at her. She'll turn to look at you, but you dont need to even face her at this point, just pretend you're still occupied with what you're doing (i';m not saying you're ignoring her...hard to explain), and as she starts to show interest and turn towards you, you reward her by also starting to face her.

It's much much much harder to "approach" a girl by walking towards her from like 20 feet away. Don't do this...you will grow increasingly nervous as you walk towards her and wont even be able to talk, plus she'll know you saw her from a long ways away. Wait until you get proximity. If a girl is interested, generally she will make herself get reasonably close to you on purpose and that's your signal to approach.

One other thing to note.....You shouldn't be approaching random girls. You can, but it will be frustrating. You know when you're at a party and you make eye contact with a girl and you can tell she's into you? That's your signal to approach. this is a numbers game and the goal is to eliminate all the girls who aren't interested. You're a quality guy and don't need to waste time trying to convert girls who aren't really interested. Wait until you get proximity or until a girl is giving you a type of signal.

If you're going to approach random hotties....try this exercise. Find the hottest girls you can possibly find throughout the day. This works well on a college campus. Approach them and say something like "i would have regretted it later if i didnt stop to tell you this. But you're really cute. have a good day." and walk away. The goal of this is NOT to get numbers. In fact dont even try. It's just to get you used to approaching cute litttle girls and realize that they're actually really nice most of the time.

Approaching sucks...it is always going to suck. Even once you're good. One thing that really helps me is to take the pressure off myself and not say "okay i NEED to do x number of approaches". Don't even think of them as approaches. Just be social wherever you go and start conversations with girls, not focusing on the number or getting laid. If the interaction is going well, pull out your phone, open your New Contacts page, and hand it to her saying "here, put your number in my phone". When getting the number, NEVER make it a big deal, and NEVER just get the number and then bail. That signals that your only goal was simply to get the number. It feels much more natural to pull the number in the middle of a convo and keep talking for a bit. But again, do NOT think of them as approaches. Think of them as just "being social" or "starting conversations" and this will take a ton of the pressure off them.

Good luck dude, you're miles ahead of half the people on here just by actually doing day approaches. I mean sh!t i can't remember the last time i pulled a number during the day...i gotta work on that. You're only goal now is to increase the number of approaches.

 

[Bingo-Player]

gonna be a lil nasty to be nice here

the last third of the conversation with her is way to needy and to be honest sounds very dictating

also approaching the second time when the friend was there was a mistake

girls this young can practically mind read one another and I'm betting her friend probably gave her some sort of funny look or something whilst you where on your way to the second approach

which is why you got blown out with that ridiculous excuse of not having a phone

the most power-fullest weapon you have at your disposal as a DJ is the ability to not give a F*CK...... once you fully accept this then you will start to see results

apart from that thumbs up on the cold approach it takes balls

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