"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Approach girls in school with 0 experience

Jamal

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Im a senior in high school , considered a newbie since haven't approach girls in god knows when. Felt like **** , went alone yestrderday an approach girls at the mall and didn't have ball to do it. Whats even worse is I can’t go out today cause got an 8 page paper to write and gotta work today. Anyways, but tomorrow i'm going to school and need to start taking action. In school, don't really approach girls, most of the time they come to me. In my mind, I feel like the only way I can get better at this is cold approaching girls at the mall and in school I always tell myself to wait till the weekend and approach girls cause if you do it in school it will just ruin your reputation. Also I have notes for all Tim and Tylers program and feel need to study that **** good before I can approach. Its kinda stupid but I just want to know what i should do...should i approach girls that are a grade below me that just look ight or what? I was planning on this week to approach this girl that is in 11th grade and ask to hangout after school (if she rejects I got other 11th graders i can ask, always looks at me when we walk past each other)...start building comfort and experience, which will get me ready to do cold approaching at malls this weekend. Just need one good week of just approaching, just feel I aint ready to approach girls that are 9's or 10's in my school until im good and i can ask one of them to prom, if you can help me out on any thing that is wrong with me dat would be great lol. I know this thread is wack but I just need some replys to motivate for this week so I don't need to make these stupid threads again promise lol
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Cassanova_Child

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1) you're overthinking it. theyre still human you know.
2) approach whoever you want.
3) man up.
4) i think you're problem isnt that you're afraid of rejection, but you're afraid of succeeding.
5) man up.
6) you dont need to start with 9s and 10s, build your confidence with 5s and 6s if you HAVE to, then move up to 7s and 8s.
 

Cassanova_Child

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New York, NY / Chapel Hill, NC
1) you're overthinking it. theyre still human you know.
2) approach whoever you want.
3) man up.
4) i think you're problem isnt that you're afraid of rejection, but you're afraid of succeeding.
5) man up.
6) you dont need to start with 9s and 10s, build your confidence with 5s and 6s if you HAVE to, then move up to 7s and 8s.
 

It's-Me

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Get over your fear and just do it.

The more you practice with the girls, the better you get it. It's like anything else in life.
 

James18

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If you have 0 experience, I will give you this golden nugget that will make your life way easier and save lots of self doubt and humiliation- approach ONLY girls who give you eye contact first.
The girls that you mentioned are looking at you in passing in the hallways- they're into you. Get their #, myspace, whatever, and start having some casual convos. If they're into you they'll be very receptive and accepting in your dealings. When you know a bit about them, suggest hanging out if they haven't already. Boom you're with a girl, easy as pie.
Do not, DO NOT walk up with some corny ass line to a gorgeous hot blond as you guys call them and spit some stupid crap in their face, you'll be blown out in 2 seconds flat.
Cold approaching is a horrible way to build up confidence and a bad way to get any results worthwhile. I'm seeing a hot blond- 5'8" cheerleader (along with 3 other girls) atm. When I'm out with the blond at the mall, a restaurant, the movies, anywhere- she gets hit on all the time. I go take a piss and she'll have a story of some goober walking up and trying to talk to her. They get rejected, quite coldly at times I might add.
Look for eye contact and build some rapport with these girls before you ask to randomly hang out with them, it sounds creeper-ish when you just want to see a total stranger out the blue.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Jamal

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James18 said:
Do not, DO NOT walk up with some corny ass line to a gorgeous hot blond as you guys call them and spit some stupid crap in their face, you'll be blown out in 2 seconds flat.
Cold approaching is a horrible way to build up confidence and a bad way to get any results worthwhile. I'm seeing a hot blond- 5'8" cheerleader (along with 3 other girls) atm. When I'm out with the blond at the mall, a restaurant, the movies, anywhere- she gets hit on all the time. I go take a piss and she'll have a story of some goober walking up and trying to talk to her. They get rejected, quite coldly at times I might add.
Look for eye contact and build some rapport with these girls before you ask to randomly hang out with them, it sounds creeper-ish when you just want to see a total stranger out the blue.
I agree with approaching girls who give eye contact and use that but unsure and doubt that cold approaching is bad to build confidence. Im going to try it this week and see for myself
 
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