Approach field report

[shouldbefun]

Hey guys, first time posting in this forum. I made an approach and I was wondering how it can be better. I guess
I am at a stage realizing that everything is temporary, and the chicks you see today, you won't see them so its better getting rejected rather than regretting later on, and its always best to capitalize your chances right now because you never know if you'll have the same chances tomorrow as you do today.

So I had an interaction with a girl at a gym. Felt very nauseous talking to her because of nervousness and not being sure if this is real or not. She looked like those barbie dolls, and super smiley which made it even harder to not be anxious. So I walked up to her, and said that I wanted to say hi. She said thats nice, but my mind was super fluttered with emotions so I just thought of backing off, but as I wanted to back off, she gave me a look like maybe you want to say something else. So we kind of talked and then started talking about majors. Told me that her boyfriend is doing something similar to a major I am doing. Anyways as I was super anxious, I decided to hit it off from this point since I achieved my goal of approaching and I wasn't after the number in the first place and I got surprised by her bringing her bf into the conversation. I thought of going for a number as an extra mile but I wasn't mentally ready and thought I missed that point.

Question,
- why did she bring her bf into the convo and how can I make it less awkward going for the number ?
-Would you approach girls with shaven heads just for the fun of it ?
-How can I be less anxious and stop that anxiety making me very rigid ?
-Was I creepy ? RSDMax talks about creepiness, but approaching girls is creepy ? Yet Julien manages to do it despite the creepiness, who should I believe ?

 

[backseatjuan]

-she did not see you as dating material
-no, they are not feminine
-you stepped out of your comport zone, what do you expect, do more
-no, if you were creepy she'd call security or police

You gotta look for approach invitations prior to approach. Good place to have lots of practice are vacation spots during season. People there are on vacation and actually expect magic to happen.

 

[shouldbefun]

-she did not see you as dating material
-no, they are not feminine
-you stepped out of your comport zone, what do you expect, do more
-no, if you were creepy she'd call security or police

You gotta look for approach invitations prior to approach. Good place to have lots of practice are vacation spots during season. People there are on vacation and actually expect magic to happen.

-its weird because she kept smiling at me when we would cross each other paths earlier on, and she even opened me up as I did one exercise. I just thought she was friendly so I didnt pay deep attention to it.

If she sees you as non dating material, does it mean you have a chance with ons?

What should you usually say after hi? When should you go for the number? Damn indirect openers are harder than direct.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Women bring boyfriends into the conversation for a few reasons. One is that they have a boyfriend. Another is that they aren't into you and are hoping that by lying to tell you they have a boyfriend, you won't hit on them. Lastly, they may not have a boyfriend and are testing you to see what your reaction is. Your reaction should always be to pretend like you didn't hear her say anything about a boyfriend. Just totally ignore it, for the purposes of conversation, banter, and flirting. There is a difference between talking and flirting, and if she says she has a boyfriend and she is also flirting, then you can make your own decision about asking for a phone number, but if she is not flirting and she's also mentioned a boyfriend, I would not ask for the number.

Sounds like at your stage, you should start approaching less attractive women. Don't go straight for 9's. Hit up the average or slightly below average girls to build your comfort and confidence up and reduce the nervousness. Hit up women who you think would feel lucky to have you talk to them - like old ladies or whatever. And yes, I'd approach a girl with a shaved head for fun. Why not? You also seem very focused on "getting the number," like that's your goal. Re-frame yourself so that numbers aren't the goal because they aren't. Your #1 goal is to take action to approach a woman and start conversation. You do that, and you won. Next goal is to have a successful dialogue with her and get more comfortable talking to women. You can only control part of that - no matter how good you are, some women aren't interested so you can't define success to how it ends up going. You are working on yourself - that's enough. Lastly, if you really think she's cute, and you did well talking to her, sure, ask for the number. But if you are thinking that's the goal the whole time, it's going to be obvious to her. So for a while, my advice is you just practice talking and forget even asking for the number.

Approaching girls is NOT creepy. This is something you have to get out of your mind. We've all been brainwashed over the last 30 or so years that it's creepy for men to approach women. It's NOT. Women love to be approached. They are flattered by it, even if they are not interested. There are just a few things to know to not be creepy:
1. Never look at a girl for a long time before approaching. IE don't scope her out for minutes or hours and then approach. When you see her, approach immediately or forget it.
2. Avoid approaching women who are talking on the phone or have headphones in. You can be successful in either situation but for now, just avoid those.
3. Pay attention to her reaction to you. If she is giving you clear signals of not being interested in you and not wanting to talk to you, leave her alone and don't be a d*ck about it. Just say, "nice meeting you, take care" with a smile and move on. Creepy is when you keep pressing a girl for conversation despite her best attempts to communicate indirectly (or directly) to you that she's not interested in talking to you. There are some girls who will put up fake resistance to see what you're made of, but for right now, don't bother with this. Only talk to a woman who engages you.

What to say after hi? Read the DJ Bible here. I believe there is a post that contains hundreds of questions you can ask a girl. Just try to avoid boring stuff like what do you do for work, etc. Try to ask her things that get to the core of who she is.

 

[shouldbefun]

Women bring boyfriends into the conversation for a few reasons. One is that they have a boyfriend. Another is that they aren't into you and are hoping that by lying to tell you they have a boyfriend, you won't hit on them. Lastly, they may not have a boyfriend and are testing you to see what your reaction is. Your reaction should always be to pretend like you didn't hear her say anything about a boyfriend. Just totally ignore it, for the purposes of conversation, banter, and flirting. There is a difference between talking and flirting, and if she says she has a boyfriend and she is also flirting, then you can make your own decision about asking for a phone number, but if she is not flirting and she's also mentioned a boyfriend, I would not ask for the number.

Sounds like at your stage, you should start approaching less attractive women. Don't go straight for 9's. Hit up the average or slightly below average girls to build your comfort and confidence up and reduce the nervousness. Hit up women who you think would feel lucky to have you talk to them - like old ladies or whatever. And yes, I'd approach a girl with a shaved head for fun. Why not? You also seem very focused on "getting the number," like that's your goal. Re-frame yourself so that numbers aren't the goal because they aren't. Your #1 goal is to take action to approach a woman and start conversation. You do that, and you won. Next goal is to have a successful dialogue with her and get more comfortable talking to women. You can only control part of that - no matter how good you are, some women aren't interested so you can't define success to how it ends up going. You are working on yourself - that's enough. Lastly, if you really think she's cute, and you did well talking to her, sure, ask for the number. But if you are thinking that's the goal the whole time, it's going to be obvious to her. So for a while, my advice is you just practice talking and forget even asking for the number.

Approaching girls is NOT creepy. This is something you have to get out of your mind. We've all been brainwashed over the last 30 or so years that it's creepy for men to approach women. It's NOT. Women love to be approached. They are flattered by it, even if they are not interested. There are just a few things to know to not be creepy:
1. Never look at a girl for a long time before approaching. IE don't scope her out for minutes or hours and then approach. When you see her, approach immediately or forget it.
2. Avoid approaching women who are talking on the phone or have headphones in. You can be successful in either situation but for now, just avoid those.
3. Pay attention to her reaction to you. If she is giving you clear signals of not being interested in you and not wanting to talk to you, leave her alone and don't be a d*ck about it. Just say, "nice meeting you, take care" with a smile and move on. Creepy is when you keep pressing a girl for conversation despite her best attempts to communicate indirectly (or directly) to you that she's not interested in talking to you. There are some girls who will put up fake resistance to see what you're made of, but for right now, don't bother with this. Only talk to a woman who engages you.

What to say after hi? Read the DJ Bible here. I believe there is a post that contains hundreds of questions you can ask a girl. Just try to avoid boring stuff like what do you do for work, etc. Try to ask her things that get to the core of who she is.

Appreciate your response, full of good stuff. Will be looking at the DJ bible.
I kind of want to get a number to later k/f-close that girl. Because thats why we are here in this forum, right ? But I get your point, enjoy the conversation which is the hardest.

Its not creepy but it sure feels hard when you see a chick that has a blank face walking down the street and you look at each other, and you just keep thinking, no hard signals given, to approach in such a random setting or keep on moving ? What should you even say and should you go direct or indirect, and then would you need to stop her, go to the same direction or move in your direction, parting ways ?

I kinda approached this shaven chick but she just acts very rigid. I guess theres a judgmental aspect and ego. Does she even like men etc Maybe she's a femme fatale or something. or Damaged goods etc etc. Is she crazy or normal outgoing person.

I approached chicks that said to me that they were flattered but I get super nervous around them, I think I have approached 13 chicks solid that wasn't wishy washy that I either got a no, number but later told me they had a bf when texting, and two that had a bf but we kind of chatted but it didn't go far. But I still feel nauseous and keep asking myself is this a good idea to approach right now in the middle of a busy environment or do I need to wait and see even more clearer signals to approach without it looking awkward because she was not expecting me to come to her.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

Do not wait for clear signals. Most women won't give them. Women appreciate a man who is bold enough to approach them without signals of interest or invitation. It is one major way you differentiate yourself from other men.

I understand it seems creepy, but you need to get out of that mindset. Again, that is from brainwashing from years of movies and TV.

You should try both direct and indirect. But never do things like ask for the time or directions.

Don't worry about the outcome yet, in terms of how many women give you a number, return your call, or agree to a date. You can only control a percentage of that.

Practice is the best way to not feel anxious or sick to your stomach etc. It will get easier, but try to think of those physical feelings as positive instead of negative. They are telling you that you are ALIVE! You are doing something. You are stepping out of your comfort zone to grow as a person, and you are having an impact on another human being (usually a positive one). You are giving women the once in a lifetime opportunity to meet: YOU.

 

[GrowingPains]

Good advice from @oldmanofthesea . You can read my post "DJ Bootcamp 2019" to read my experiences about approaching women if you want. I'm going to be approaching more as the week continues and will detail it later.

The only way to get comfortable with talking to women is to talk to more women. You will never lift 200 lbs by thinking about lifting 200 lbs or watching videos about lifting 200 lbs. They may help you, but the most gains will be from progressively increasing the weight until you can do 200. And as with lifting, you need to push yourself out of your comfort zone when approaching women.

Feel free to join in on the DJ Bootcamp if you want, could be a really good instructive way for you to get better at approaching and then we can chat about the experiences and learn from each other.

 

[The Duke]

You get better by doing. Start chatting up all of them. Old ladies, fatties, shaved heads, etc. Use each interaction as a stepping stone to get better, eliminate your fears, and build your confidence.

The idea here is to improve your social skills. Not secure a date with some woman you are highly attracted to. First build a foundation.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Question,
- why did she bring her bf into the convo and how can I make it less awkward going for the number ?

Disinterest. High interest, women forget they have a husband.

Women will claw the eyes out if every man, women, and children to get to the alpha male.

Would you approach girls with shaven heads just for the fun of it ?

That stupid goro mk Kristi mack haircut screams attention ***** and sge eats box. Reeks if bpd. I still will hit it but i rather not. Its not feminine.

How can I be less anxious and stop that anxiety making me very rigid ?

I trip. I explore consciousness. I seek self knowledge. The mark is self actualization. After a ayahuasca retreat or smoking dmt, after ego death, and rebirth, you really get it.

I want you to hit me as hard as you can.

I Don't want to die without any scars.

This is your life and its ending one minute at a time.

Hit on baeeeees. Have a flirt. Charm sluts the way you would If YOU HAD ALREADY GONE ASS TO MOUTH & & & YOU NUTTED ON HER FACE.

Zero ****s. You already hit it abd would much prefer her barely legal younger sister. Act accordingly.

Was I creepy ? RSDMax talks about creepiness, but approaching girls is creepy ?

There's a lot of creepy dudes, incels, virgins, ass burgers lol autistic retards in pickup who have never seen a vagina before. They are creepy as ****kkk.

Guess what? So is plummeted SMV and cratered SMV. So is divorce rape. As is playing house with the ***** who spent her best days skiing down cawk mountain. 99% of men call her wife.

80% of divorce initiated by women. How's that for creepy? How about the waist size of women after marriage?

Flip the script.

Being real, gym pickup is complex especially if you got wackkk game. Alex 4x rule is OG. Gym culture is douche. Its got its own subculture. It is clicky.

Drop the excuses. Go get baeees. Read the rational male. Intake the knowledge but know even then, it's the same man then marrying epiphany phase lol

Read the Game but know, strauss is getting divorce raped. Mystery is the star of pua and he's a manic depressant crying over a oneittus. He is punked for the system he created when much of the culture who aren't worthy of carrying his boots or fake ****in mustaches or magic tricks. This is a tragedy when he's the GOAT who failed to learn copy, marketing, and evolve. What a shame. Forever mirrin #wohoooooo.

Yet Julien manages to do it despite the creepiness,

I've been doing pickup for about a decade (between relationships, flings, school biz. Life, etc). To date, I have never seen anybody better than Julien blanc prior to the 2014 **** storm where he went full retard. Who knows as of 2019. I don't condone the behaviour but, the real question is why do women reciprocate to the tactics? Better put, why are women wet for a pua pretending to choke her?

I cannot stress enough, use common sense. He got a 5 country ban and has sense pivoted out of pickup. RMG and rollo love to attack then but the pivot was necessary. When i saw him in 2014, he was going nuts, jackknife powerbombing sluts in the bar (nearly) and Wilding out following free tour (insider info leaked where he was going after event).

As of 2019, I have no clue although, yruth on sucess # 6 shows infield. Furthermore, the Samuel documentary shows how good he is. Yes, lots of marketing. Still, I have not seen anybody that good. Ten game is a banger. He's gone full retard with capes and peacock outfits yet, drops gems of insight periodically in trauma work that is TM. Month #2 bonus infield death meditation is ****kkkked. Beyond a ayahuasca retreat or smoking dmt, its pretty next level meditation. There in and of itself, yiu have a answer. Gun to the head, can you approach? How about your family? How far do you want to go with this? Few are forged in the fire. There's no going back thereafter. As in, I would never marry. Its what cucks do.

There's no comparison. Max is a good kid. Positive. Into fitness. Pull from everyone. See what works for you. Blanc is a Tyler's prodigy and max is a julien prodigy.

Julien gets away with murder. I'd get shived or shanked trying anything like that. I hit on a hawtttt brunette and 4phaggits tried to play tough guy. And i called them out fir low testosterone. Neither stepped up.

Be warned, keep it real. **** can pop off.

who should I believe

Yrs of pickup will show you,

Spoiler

every chick is practice.... More importantly, new girls are turning 18 everyday.


Come at me bro

Check JMLUV. Dude lit up rsdnation. Former Tyler assistant. Claims huge kill count but said he pulled a few trannys lol in a recent podcast.

5/10 pulling way above his SMV.