Approach anxiety due to people but not target

[david90]

The people around me give me anxiety! If you put me in a room with a HB, i would have no problem talking.

Anybody have the same problem?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Nope, but who are the other people? Do you know them or not? Does she know them? Are they engaged in conversation with her already?

 

[john_1234]

hey david i used to thing the same way. i got over this by going for it anyway despite others being around. i've been turned down while other people were nearby who probably heard the whole thing go down. try it. approach that girl in the coffee shop and start talking to her despite the fact that there are several people nearby. you'll get more tough skinned and you'll soon realize the people nearby aren't ****. i've also had obtained #'s while others were around. haha, i recall this dude totally spying on the whole interaction. i'm sure he was like, "damn, this guy has balls!"

 

[david90]

i swear when I approach, people pick up on it and starts to move closer and listen in on me. Some say it is all in my head but i don't know

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by david90
i swear when I approach, people pick up on it and starts to move closer and listen in on me. ...

Then say to yourself "Ahhhh, the spotlight is on... IT'S SHOWTIME!!!"

 

[Lesson4u]

Get the group involved in your approach, not just the target.

Your anxiety stems from the you being self-conscious about people watching you open the target. Once you win over the group, you will not feel the pressure of "performing" in front of everyone.

Practice makes perfect. Once you have done hundreds of these, it will be no problem.

GL....................Lesson

 

[Controlfreak]

The problem is that you care what other people think!

Or that you may not be conforming to group or society "social rules"

Care no more (but dont break the law)

 

[wheelin&dealin]

Are you approaching a group of people and then asking a girl out? I personally don't deal with girls when they are in large groups, the situation gets too weird. It's way easier to work on chicks when they are by themselves or in groups of 2. Don't let this stop you from approaching groups though.

As for innocent bystanders listening in on your pick-up, don't worry about them. Just like 95% of the population, they have no balls to talk to women so they can go home and dream about one day being like you.

 

[Ricky]

If I have any girl fairly well isolated I can talk to any of them. I think I have the same issue at times. But I think with people and an audience of friends I also like to shine, maybe I'm a showoff!

I just hate the groups because i know inevitably i'll be ****blocked.