Apology help...

[shock]

It's one thing after another... Okay so to keep this short and sweet, my gf and I we're having a pretty serious convo last night over the phone. (apparently extremely serious to her) Well it was late, I was laying down, and fell asleep on her.

She is crushed.. She wouldn't answer any of my calls, simply texts. She is so pissed at me, and upset, and all the above.

One message from her:

"You know what,I dont even care. I'm letting you deal with this and fiz it and make it the way it was over time. It's all on you, your responsible. You earn back what you want."

yikes. That was basicly how we left it. I'm scrambling here. Tonight is her big b-day party we've been planning, and she's talkin about not even having it.

I feel like shi*. Any ideas??

 

[Phyzzle]

I we're having a pretty serious convo last night over the phone.

There's your problem. Have those convos in person.

Better yet, have all convos in person. Use the phone to set up meeting times.

Jeez, you could have said "my phone died".

So she was saying something that was vital enough to cut contact with you - and yet it was so mind-blowingly boring that it knocked you unconcious in mid sentence.

I mean, what?

What were you talking about, I gotta know.

You did something wrong, so you should say 'I'm sorry'. But don't message her to apologize continuously until she comes around. Once is enough.

 

[Kings_royalty]

She is acting like a snotty little $hit in my opinion. Yeah, so you feel asleep, so what, it's not like you did it on purpose. All you can do is apologize for what happened.

Sure, I can understand her being upset but she's behaving like a bratty little child.

"You earn back what you want."

What, excuse me? Man please, don't you DARE give in to this. You need to say 'listen, i already apologized for what happened, if you are going to start acting like a baby, let me know because i don't have time for this.'

This is the perfect opportunity for you to set the 'frame'. She needs to know now that you will not put up with childish games.

Tonight is her big b-day party we've been planning, and she's talkin about not even having it.


I would say, 'whatever, don't have it then'.

YOU should be upset towards her 'behavior'/'reaction' to what happened because it's childish. A 'mature' woman, a 'quality' woman would be upset but wouldn't 'act' like a child over it. Don't put up with it.

 

[unorthodox]

I'm wondering if responding to this in playful way would be a better idea than in a serious way? i.e. saying something like "Oh look at that baby acting like a spoiled little girl. Baby are you piss? What happened?" You know like that, instead of trying to strike some reason with her.

By the way, he followed the rules for men, in a way he ended the conversation first.

 

[Kings_royalty]

responding to this in playful way would be a better idea than in a serious way?

No sir, he needs to come out with a serious tone. If he uses the playful approach he will come off as being immature (especially in her eyes), because of what happened. Plus, it won't have the same effect. There is a time and place to be serious or playful; this isn't one of those playful times.


She's basically trying to set the frame and say 'o.k, you pissed me off, now you have to kiss my a$$, let me climb up on my pedestal first'. See what I’m saying? By not giving into this, he's basically kicking the pedestal out from under her while she's trying to climb on.