Anyone like girls less once you find out that they like you?

[Production6257]

I have noticed that whenever I find out or know that a girl likes me, my attraction towards her begins to fade. There is a girl that I met about two weeks ago, and when I first met her I was like "Wow! This girl is hot". But then a couple days later she randomly showed up at my apartment and stayed for an hour and a half, so I knew something was up. Then she searched me out at a party, talked to me for a pretty long time there, and basically followed me back to my place. She stayed there for a few hours before going home. It's just so weird with me because if she hadn't started doing this stuff, I'd still pretty much be head over heels for her, but now I'm not even sure if I want her anymore.

 

[musclyjerk]

What you're describing is a female trait, you should be ashamed of yourself.

The Muscly Jerk

 

[Production6257]

Yea, I know it sounds ridiculous. The crazy thing is that I'm the quiet type and I almost always wait for the girl to make a move (I guess that's another female trait haha). So I should be pumped when this kind of stuff happens, but instead I get turned off. I can't really help the way that I feel so I'm not ashamed, but it really does blow.

 

[musclyjerk]

Maybe you're a little scared/anxious or feeling like you can't now take it further, thus you lose interest.

I aren't trying to sound offensive, just trying to help you work out why you may be losing interest like this.

If a guy has problems performing in the bedroom for instance, he loses interest in sex.

Perhaps it's a similar situation but more to due with feeling like you lack the skills nessasary to take it further with this girl.

The Muscly Jerk

 

[Production6257]

Yea you could be somewhat right. I do kind of suck at closing the deal. But I don't know, it's kind of weird because one time I had a one night stand (not full sex, but head and watnot), and over the next week I became less and less attracted to the girl to the point where I am just flat out disgusted by her now. So even in a situation where I got as far as I wanted to go, I still experienced the loss of attraction.

 

[skinnydart]

I know exactly what you mean, the same thing happens to me and I can't figure it out. Even my buddies kindof think I'm weird.

But yeah, I'm the type that waits for obvious signals that a girl is interested in me. Then as soon as I get her number or go on a first date, or sometimes even as soon as I realize she would definetly give me her number if I asked, I suddenly forget why I was ever attracted to her in the first place.

Just a thought, could it be due to a lack of self-confidence or something? Almost like "wow, she's really into me and I don't think I'm that great, maybe her standards are lower than I thought". I guess what I'm getting at is if you don't think you're a great catch, and she's attracted to you, all of the sudden she becomes less of a catch.

...that or just as soon as you realize she likes you, the game is kindof over. We read all the time on here that we always need to "keep her wondering", or "never tell you that you like her", but I'm sure it works the other way as well. Guys like the "chase" just as much as the girls do, and as soon as we realize we've got this girl in the palm of our hand, sometimes we'll leave and go onto someone else.

 

[Pakwah]

I think of ladies interest the same way I think about a night home alone. If you know you are home alone, with nothing to do...its like - god i can't believe I am stuck at home. All of a sudden the phone rings and its a friend saying - Hey, wanna go out? Then you think, ok, I can go out IF if WANT to, but I don't HAVE to. So now you sit at home and think - this aint so bad.....All of a sudden you have the option to go out, where as before you didn't. You can walk out the door anytime you want, but you don't. You stay home with the OPTION of going out as opposed to not having anywhere to go.

 

[ye yeah]

im in a similar situation and when i think it seems me and a girl are going to hook up,all the pressure from me being nervous makes me think shyt i dont want to anymore