"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Anyone elses's Girfriend on anti depressants

anotherafc

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Hi guys,

I've been viewing the site for a few months now but this is my first post.

My question is about chicks and antidepressants. My long term girlfriend has been taking meds for a long time now. The only real effect I've noticed over time is that she seems tired all the time and has hardly any sex drive. This is not a sudden development. She has been this way for a few years. It just seems to be getting worse lately.

Obviously, my big problem is the lack of sex drive. It makes it hard to determine if I have a non existent interest level on my hands or if it's the medication she is taking. Ether way it spells trouble. She defiantly has issues that I can't understand. Her family is great. Her dad has a lot of money. She’s educated and has a good job. She is extremely attractive. Yet she is always down about something.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Am I staying on a sinking ship here?
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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squirrels

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A girl being on antidepressants would concern ME, but I'm usually overcautious about that kind of thing.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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anotherafc said:
... Her family is great. Her dad has a lot of money. She’s educated and has a good job. She is extremely attractive. Yet she is always down about something...
Lesson learned: Packaging isn't everything. The unfortunate thing about most prescription medicines is that there are typically side effects and you're watching what is seems to be the norm. Since this is a part of her lifestyle, expect the necessity to endure this for an indeterminable length of time.
 

blueguy

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I would not date a girl who took or wanted to take anti-depressants. It shows a huge lack of control, which is one thing I look for in a girl - being that I work hard developing that area myself.

I would seriously think about the kind of person you are and how this relationship relates to that. If you are an ambitious person, then this situation is going to make you unhappy for a long time. It's not likely she'll change. People who take anti-depressants usually have the victim mindset, which is a fundamental roadblock to getting one's body chemistry to happy levels naturally.
 

odietamo

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this is a subject i would like to see expanded on more.

i am finding more and more chicks are on these types of medication.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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odietamo said:
...
i am finding more and more chicks are on these types of medication.
It doesn't mean that you have to date them...
 

st_99

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I dated a girl on anti dep., she just seemed like she didn't care about anything. She was kind of a wild one, lived on the edge so to speak, no morals, no values. Bad news. Sex was fun though.
 

odietamo

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
It doesn't mean that you have to date them...
thx for the 411.

i'm talking more about how to weigh this variable. should it be an "Auto-NEXT" or what? I'm basically interested in seeing more opinions on the subject.

my own opinion is that it is that it can be a good indicator of a low-quality women, especially if she has that "victim mentality" thing going on. (looking at things for a LTR point of view.)

for STR/FB status, it probably shouldn't be as big of a disqualifier.
 

blueguy

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Well, let me clarify what I posted.

I don't consider sex dating. What I meant was that my personal standards are that I would not seriously get attached to a girl on antidepressants. Of course people are entitled to their own opinions.

I just mark it in the head as non-relationship material. There are a couple girls who told me when we were out that they were on the meds. I have no idea why girls open up like this to guys they barely know. But once they told me this, I considered them for fun, and that's all.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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blueguy said:
...There are a couple girls who told me when we were out that they were on the meds. I have no idea why girls open up like this to guys they barely know....
It was nothing more than a disclaimer renouncing accountability for any action which they may perform in the future. Think of it like people who preface that they are dependent on drugs, alcohol, food, or any other manner where they can claim that they have some type of addiction. They have no personal accountability, it's their vice(s) that are in control of their actions.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Bible_Belt

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My ex-wife got on lexapro for depression and gained about 60 pounds. She still loves the lexapro, because she says she never feels suicidal when on it.

My current gf is on paxil for ocd. I fvcking hate it. To have the upper hand in a relationship, you have to be able to exert influence upon the girl's emotions. Paxil blocks the negative emotions that we could otherwise use to our advantage. It's like kryptonite. For example, when we do something like make ourselves less available, we want the girl to experience a little anxiety.

She gained a little weight, but she avoids gaining any more by only eating about one meal a day. As for libido, when things are good between us, she has an amazing sex drive. She's still nutty enough in the head for the paxil to not affect her sex drive.

On the one hand, crazy people are good in bed, and on the other hand, crazy chicks in our day and age tend to be on anti-depressants. If I date another chick on meds, I am going to make sure that she is crazy enough for the meds to not work very well.

Also, keep in mind, that if you knock up a chick on anti-depressants, (remember that she is the one who calls the shots over whether or not to get an abortion) the effects on the child are not fully known. A recent study said that although the risk of some rare birth defects went up by 500%, the increased risk was still better than a depressed pregnant woman who might smoke, drink, or eat poorly due to depression. Babies happen. A women might swear that she would get an abortion, and then change her mind after she gets pregnant. Then your kid might be fvcked up because of the pills she's on.
 

anotherafc

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Bible_Belt said:
My current gf is on paxil for ocd. I fvcking hate it. To have the upper hand in a relationship, you have to be able to exert influence upon the girl's emotions. Paxil blocks the negative emotions that we could otherwise use to our advantage. It's like kryptonite. For example, when we do something like make ourselves less available, we want the girl to experience a little anxiety.
I relate to what you are saying here. It's not like they are overly happy, It's not like they are depressed, It's more like the are neutral or indifferent.

My girl on the other hand doesn't act crazy in a slutty fun sense. It's more like extremly boring. Trying to get her to go out and let loose on action dates is next to impossible.
 

stumped

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I think the answer here is to NEVER put up with a girl on these meds.

Why the hell should you? Even if 20% of girls were on meds, that still leaves 80%.

I like to see emotion from a girl I'm involved with, it lets me know she actually cares. These walking zombies will just frustrate the crap out of you.
 

STR8UP

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I took an AD for anxiety awhile back. that stuff can fukk you up. As far as i can tell it helped me though, even after I couldn't stand the side effects any more and stopped taking it. They say it can help to rewire your brain to get it back to what most people would consider normal, and I think it did for me.

This isn't an automatic red flag or a reason to next a chick, but I know these drugs can have some crazy side effects, so you're gonna have to play it by ear and decide whether or not it's worth putting up with them.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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anotherafc

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STR8UP said:
I took an AD for anxiety awhile back. that stuff can fukk you up.
Can you describe what kind of side effects you are refering to?
 

theunflushables

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Do you think crazy Tom Cruise is on to something?

As fo side effects:

Lack of sex drive
weight gain
tiredness
and all the other sh1t they mention on the ads
 

The Librarian

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My last LTR was bouncing around on different anti-depressants while we were together (two and a half years). Paxil was actually pretty good for her. Zoloft was horrible, and so was one other one whose name is escaping for now.

Paxil didn't do much to destroy her sex drive. Zoloft completely obliterated it. As mentioned, weight gain was a factor as was exhaustion. Also, my ex would forget to keep track of when she needed refills, so there were extreme moodswings when she had to go without it.
 

paintballz

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my god i been with one and will never go back!! if she's on them its likely she's abusing other prescription meds as well

for you lifes sake GET THE FCUK out of there while you can

i burned 6 years of my life with one
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

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