Any way to keep this going?

[The Comeback Kid]

Last weekend, I was at a small party with a few friends who I've been trying to hang out with more often this year at school. At this small party, I met a cute HB8 who I seemed to click with. Due to the setting and that my other friends know her a lot more than I do, there wasn't going to be a way to isolate her or do anything real serious. In addition, she seems to be a "nice" girl, who is down-to-earth, respectful, and a cool person. I'd say the only negative was that I didn't get her number. I figured I'd see her this weekend and ask her out then (and get her number then too). However, my friends weren't going to be around where she would be, so nothing came of it.

Due to the factors above, I've had to resort to - gulp - facebook, when it comes to breaking the ice a bit more (somehow we were facebook friends already, even though we just met last week). I wrote out what the back-and-forth was here for you guys to see (i.e. Igetit). As you'll see, it goes from nice/polite to some flirting. My goal here was to KEEP IT SHORT and KEEP IT LIGHT. It's not really really flirty, but I did a good job of keeping it short/light:

TCK: Cool meeting you this past weekend, even if you say you're a fan of (my least favorite sports team), j/k. How's your job at the gym? Seems like a cool gig.
HB: The gym is a great time, just like (my least favorite team)...it was nice meeting you too!
TCK: Nice, what class do you teach (she's an instructor)? Depending on the class, maybe I should consider stopping by haha. Perhaps you'll be around if the crew (friends we both know) is up to anything this coming weekend?
HB: I teach a kickboxing class...but you can't watch! haha sorry, no boys allowed. I'll be around this weekend, so maybe I'll see you then.
...a few days pass. I didn't plan on writing anything, but yesterday I was a little bored and knew I probably wasn't going to see her, so I wrote a quick response...
TCK: ouch! haha i'm only kidding. I am a little scared though...kickboxing?...you might be able to kick my @$$...maybe .

Question is...anyway to smoothly move things forward? Maybe I can PM her for her #, suggesting we grab a bite in between classes on a certain day of the week? Right now, I'm making sure I'm "in" with this new group of friends I have, since I'm starting to see them more and more. It would not be smart to openly be hitting on a girl they all know right away, it'll come off as weird, or it'll start some sort of drama I don't want. I've had a hilariously bad history of "showing my hand" too easily, even if I don't say I could be interested in a girl - this summer, for example, my boss knew the first day I was hitting on the hot chick in our department, and I didn't feel I was doing a whole lot). It's something I'm working on improving.

 

[The Comeback Kid]

Any ideas or suggestions? I only met her once, so this isn't a BIG deal. Just something that could be nice if it worked, could be a"plate."

 

[slaog]

TCK: ouch! haha i'm only kidding. I am a little scared though...kickboxing?...you might be able to kick my @$$...maybe .

Well that doesn't sound like the best responce. It sounds like a boy trying to be nice to his female boss. Remember you're the MAN and shes a little girl in your mind. So you should tease her about the kickboxing ie say something like "you you teach your class how to scratch too? ". Maybe thats not the best example but it comes from a position of higher value.

Question is...anyway to smoothly move things forward? Maybe I can PM her for her #, suggesting we grab a bite in between classes on a certain day of the week? Right now, I'm making sure I'm "in" with this new group of friends I have, since I'm starting to see them more and more. It would not be smart to openly be hitting on a girl they all know right away, it'll come off as weird, or it'll start some sort of drama I don't want. I've had a hilariously bad history of "showing my hand" too easily, even if I don't say I could be interested in a girl - this summer, for example, my boss knew the first day I was hitting on the hot chick in our department, and I didn't feel I was doing a whole lot). It's something I'm working on improving.

Forget about what people think. As long as nobody is after this girl then everything should be fine.


Maybe the best thing you can do is tell her that shes welcome to join you for lunch sometime. Tell her to send her number if she wants to meet up. That way theres no pressure on her, you don't come across as wanting it badly and if she doesn't want to go it means things won't be awkward if she hangs out with the crew sometimes.

 

[The Comeback Kid]

Thanks Slaog.

I see your point with the kickboxing line. The reason I am ok about saying that is because I'm physically pretty fit. There's no way she would kick my @$$ lol. I tried to say it as if it were a joke.

The second part sounds good too. I may see how this week goes, then proceed from there. I feel there's a chance people will be doing something next weekend, and then there'd be no need for the facebook stuff.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Last weekend, I was at a small party with a few friends who I've been trying to hang out with more often this year at school. At this small party, I met a cute HB8 who I seemed to click with. Due to the setting and that my other friends know her a lot more than I do, there wasn't going to be a way to isolate her or do anything real serious.

This is what consistently holds you back from all the threads you post; YOURSELF!!! You constantly limit yourself due to thinking about what others might think or assuming the girl wouldn't be down for this or that, which then always leads to over-analyzation.

Let me ask you this; how do you know that if you had flirted with her a little more and then asked her to come to the car with you for a second, or go upstairs etc, that she wouldn't have been receptive??

Girls work of their emotions, its biology, so when you get her emotionally and physically interested, she's not going to be able to stop it from happening.

In addition, she seems to be a "nice" girl, who is down-to-earth, respectful, and a cool person.

I know A LOT of girls that are nice, down-to-earth and respectful.... they also are without a doubt some of the horniest chicks I know as well...

I'd say the only negative was that I didn't get her number. I figured I'd see her this weekend and ask her out then (and get her number then too). However, my friends weren't going to be around where she would be, so nothing came of it.


Your first mistake was not taking advantage of a GOLDEN opportunity at the initial party to isolate and capture her interest. Now you go a couple weeks without seeing her and unless she was highly physically attracted to you, your opportunity most likely passed you by for now...

Due to the factors above, I've had to resort to - gulp - facebook, when it comes to breaking the ice a bit more (somehow we were facebook friends already, even though we just met last week). I wrote out what the back-and-forth was here for you guys to see (i.e. Igetit). As you'll see, it goes from nice/polite to some flirting. My goal here was to KEEP IT SHORT and KEEP IT LIGHT. It's not really really flirty, but I did a good job of keeping it short/light:

TCK: Cool meeting you this past weekend, even if you say you're a fan of (my least favorite sports team), j/k. How's your job at the gym? Seems like a cool gig.
HB: The gym is a great time, just like (my least favorite team)...it was nice meeting you too!
TCK: Nice, what class do you teach (she's an instructor)? Depending on the class, maybe I should consider stopping by haha. Perhaps you'll be around if the crew (friends we both know) is up to anything this coming weekend?
HB: I teach a kickboxing class...but you can't watch! haha sorry, no boys allowed. I'll be around this weekend, so maybe I'll see you then.
...a few days pass. I didn't plan on writing anything, but yesterday I was a little bored and knew I probably wasn't going to see her, so I wrote a quick response...
TCK: ouch! haha i'm only kidding. I am a little scared though...kickboxing?...you might be able to kick my @$$...maybe .

Question is...anyway to smoothly move things forward? Maybe I can PM her for her #, suggesting we grab a bite in between classes on a certain day of the week? Right now, I'm making sure I'm "in" with this new group of friends I have, since I'm starting to see them more and more. It would not be smart to openly be hitting on a girl they all know right away, it'll come off as weird, or it'll start some sort of drama I don't want.

Again your self limiting beliefs, holding you back here. Why would it start drama in your group if you are interested in HB8? Do what you need to do to move this situation forward. Whether that is getting her number, asking her out or making out with her, don't let your next chance with her vanish into the night.

I've had a hilariously bad history of "showing my hand" too easily, even if I don't say I could be interested in a girl - this summer, for example, my boss knew the first day I was hitting on the hot chick in our department, and I didn't feel I was doing a whole lot). It's something I'm working on improving.

Showing your hand too early is never a bad thing, unless the girl IS NOT interested in you. Now I don't mean to confess your dying feelings of devotion and love, but to weed through all the bullshyt, as a man, you need to establish your interest and go take what you want.

STOP THINKING SO MUCH, YOUR OVER-ANALYSIS definitely kills your game and you've got solid potential.[/QUOTE]




Go get what you want; your already taking to her through Facebook, so set up a time/place for you two to get together through there. If she's receptive then its a whole new ball-game. If she isn't you don't have to worry about getting the number and then figuring out when to call...






PIMP