"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Any thoughts on my situation?

S

Squiggly Sponge

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Basically, I've been in a relationship for nearly 6 months and have had NO arguments with the woman. I'm not too bothered about it, but you must admit this is pretty odd. So I'm wondering what your take on it is.

I get on pretty well with the lady, but still disagreements and arguments are a natural thing. There were the general tests in the beginning, but I passed them and would like to think I control the frame (although I'm naturally wary about this). I'd rather be aware of what could be wrong as opposed to thinking I'm infallible...

Girls like going on emotional roller coasters and whatnot (so I hear), have I possibly found an exception? Or is this the beginning of the end? Thing is I'm fairly laid back and so is she. Although this might be mistaken for nonchalance.

Fire away guys!
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Igetit!

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Man,I have to admit that this is pretty odd. You mean that you have been with this woman for 6 months and you haven't had any arguements?
That is weird. But I have some questions. First,how old is she? Do the 2 of you spend a lot of time together? When you make plans for the 2 of you,does she agree and follow through or give you excuses? Also,is she open and outgoing, or is she shy?
 
J

Jeffst1980

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Is she avoiding conflict because she loves you or because she no longer cares enough?

I'm guessing the first. There really shouldn't be that much fighting in a good, solid relationship. When a girl has high IL she will submit to you much more and there won't be any need for arguments.

When a girl loses interest (or feels unloved), initially there will be a marked increase in fighting, as well as that "roller coaster of emotions" you talk about. When a girl's interest sinks further and is looking for a replacement (or already found one), there will suddenly be a DECREASE in fights, because she no longer cares.

It looks like you're doing fine. Resist the urge to stir up drama and mess things up.
 
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02hero

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Yeah, enjoy it while you can. You're a man, don't make a drama out of not having any, that's her job........ :up:
 
S

Squiggly Sponge

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Igetit! said:
Man,I have to admit that this is pretty odd. You mean that you have been with this woman for 6 months and you haven't had any arguements?
That is weird. But I have some questions. First,how old is she? Do the 2 of you spend a lot of time together? When you make plans for the 2 of you,does she agree and follow through or give you excuses? Also,is she open and outgoing, or is she shy?
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No arguments whatsoever. She's 22, and we did spend a lot of time together in university but now we're back home and meet up every few weeks. She lets me lead, which is pretty awesome... she's just a traditional girl I guess.

Jeffst1980 said:
Is she avoiding conflict because she loves you or because she no longer cares enough?
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And here we have the caveat. She hasn't said she loves me yet, and I've said nothing of the sort (of course). But her actions say otherwise...

02hero, I'd do nothing of the sort! Just wanted a perspective from the guys with more experience (relationship wise).

Thanks!
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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N

noirsake

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Well I'm almost 2 months in with my gf and we haven't argued. I mean we may have a stupid disagreement like "omg you don't like tacos?!" or whatever and we joke about it but nothing else. I wouldn't complain about not having an argument.
 
T

The Sperminator

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Arguing can be healthy to a certain degree but don't be worry if you don't. You get along leave it as is. The only time not arguing can be bad is when you are keeping what you think or your feelings inside. Then thats real bad. You should never harvest any negative feelings. But if you're not you're good man.
 
D

DonJuan11

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Squiggly Sponge said:
Basically, I've been in a relationship for nearly 6 months and have had NO arguments with the woman. I'm not too bothered about it, but you must admit this is pretty odd. So I'm wondering what your take on it is.
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Man this site and tv has brainwashed people...

If you want to fight with her because you haven't had one in 6 months, go ahead. Just don't expect her to get weak knees from the argument and start tearing her clothes off.
 
O

OTB

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DonJuan11 said:
Man this site and tv has brainwashed people...

If you want to fight with her because you haven't had one in 6 months, go ahead. Just don't expect her to get weak knees from the argument and start tearing her clothes off.
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^^^^^ Ahahaha! :crackup:

Thus spoke the voice of reason! :D

Couldn't have put it any better myself! :up:
 
I

I.A.F.Y.B.

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Don't over analyze this. Or else you might create fights on stupid sh!t and regret it. I have been in relationships where I also wen't for a long period of time with no arguments. Don't worry they will come and you wish it didn't happen.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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S

Squiggly Sponge

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DonJuan11 said:
Man this site and tv has brainwashed people...

If you want to fight with her because you haven't had one in 6 months, go ahead. Just don't expect her to get weak knees from the argument and start tearing her clothes off.
Click to expand...
If you read the sentence you quoted, you'll see that I didn't mention wanting to cause a fight at all. I just asked for a second opinion. Whatever your problem with this site and the television is, you might want to stick to the topic instead of being irrelevant, okay?
 
I

Igetit!

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What kind of personality does this girl have?Is she outgoing or shy?
To tell the truth,when you said that you see each other every couple of weeks,then the fact that you 2 never argue made a little more sense.
If the 2 of you spent more time together,I'm sure that at least every now and then,there would be some disagreements.
 
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