Any more tips on getting over a bad oneitis?

[DJorBUST]

So, I was dating a chick who was my dream girl for years for almost 2 months but her IL dropped significantly and I think she may be dating other guys. She called me last Saturday and I tried to set something up with her for this week. Her phone cut out because of bad reception so she messaged me and said she would call me the next day. I messaged back saying the ball was in her court to call me to set something up for this week and she said "sounds good". I haven't heard anything from her since then. So, basically I've given up on this one in my head. I'm not going to text or contact her anymore.

In the meantime Ive setup two dates with a HB7 vietnamese girl and this HB8-9 hispanic girl for next week (I have a major exam next Tuesday and dont want to f*ck it up). I don't have anywhere near the interest in them that I have in the girl who now has low IL, but I figure they can definitely take my mind off her for a night.

I've also been exercising more, started taking 5-htp twice daily and started taking more fish oil tablets because they've been shown to help with depression. I'm trying to surround myself with friends and go out with friends as much as I can.

Is there anything else you guys suggest I do to help with this depression I'm constantly feeling? It's horrible right when I wake up and gets better throughout the day.

 

[eko]

For short term stuff, get busy doing something so you don't focus on the negative. I like working out or playing guitar. during the night just go out with some friends and just have a good time. Laugh

There was this one girl I still have oneitis for... she pretty much left me in the dust. I'm doing ok with it though. I've been to a bunch of parties for the past 5 nights in a row... everyone's leaving for college soon.

 

[DJorBUST]

For short term stuff, get busy doing something so you don't focus on the negative. I like working out or playing guitar. during the night just go out with some friends and just have a good time. Laugh

There was this one girl I still have oneitis for... she pretty much left me in the dust. I'm doing ok with it though. I've been to a bunch of parties for the past 5 nights in a row... everyone's leaving for college soon.

You still have oneitis for her? How long has it been since she left you?

 

[B4IFURU18?]

You know what I did? I made plans with my buddies (instead of girl), and wouldn't go over to her house at 11:30 at night to **** her (I had work at 6am, and it wasn't convenient at the time). She got short with me, and dropped a small dramabomb, obviously not liking the fact that I wouldn't fulfill her needs at her beck and call.

Well, her over-reaction pissed me off, and I was content with not thinking about her or talking to her for a while.

She's since apologized...

 

[eko]

You still have oneitis for her? How long has it been since she left you?

um she left the country for a while and we broke up. she recently got back and i found myself wanting her back and she hasn't really been even talking to me. it's her fault though because she's pretty immature about some things. but good thing im leaving pretty much for good tomorrow.

 

[DJorBUST]

You know what I did? I made plans with my buddies (instead of girl), and wouldn't go over to her house at 11:30 at night to **** her (I had work at 6am, and it wasn't convenient at the time). She got short with me, and dropped a small dramabomb, obviously not liking the fact that I wouldn't fulfill her needs at her beck and call.

Well, her over-reaction pissed me off, and I was content with not thinking about her or talking to her for a while.

She's since apologized...

Haha...I can only wish that my problem was passing up an opportunity to nail her!

 

[B4IFURU18?]

Haha...I can only wish that my problem was passing up an opportunity to nail her!

Well, I'm sure there will be times when it's not convenient for you to be with her. Her response to that may be sour, and she may cop an attitude directly with you. If you sense that, and it truly bothers you, let her know.

There are plenty of ways to avoid feeling like she's all you have to think about. It's difficult, I've been there.

Just stay as active as possible, and if you think her interest level is high enough, it's ok to see her more than you think. She's probably not going to all of sudden become disinterested. And if she does, back off the throttle a bit. But it's unlikely as long as you're maintaining control of your self, and being entertaining.

Edit to add: The ONLY time I ever say "the ball is in your court" or make it known that I'm leaving it up to the girl to contact me, is when things haven't been going well lately. Like if we've had quite a few missed connections because SHE's too busy. I'll just make a reference to her being busy all the time and saying something like: "Well, when you're not so busy, give me a call...".

 

[navyseal2101]

I have an ongoing oneitis, some days I cant top thinking of her , others I dont think of her once. I've noticed the days I dont think of her at all im busy. Seems if you give yourself time to think of her you will, so just get busy. Thats the advice I was given and it does work, but the first few days of being busy you may still think of her. It will fade in due time though. I passed an opporitunity to nai lthis girl to and now shes away for awhile so I DEFINATLY feel you, but I may see her in the future, so I cant fully relate. GL anyways!

 

[DJorBUST]

Edit to add: The ONLY time I ever say "the ball is in your court" or make it known that I'm leaving it up to the girl to contact me, is when things haven't been going well lately. Like if we've had quite a few missed connections because SHE's too busy. I'll just make a reference to her being busy all the time and saying something like: "Well, when you're not so busy, give me a call...".

Actually, it's funny that you say that because that is what happened in the conversation but her interest level has been declining. I tried to setup a date with her for next week (I wanted to keep this week open for studying for a major exam). She said on both of her days off she would be out of the city with her aunt and she would be gone that weekend for a close friends wedding (which I know is a legit excuse because I know the friend). Foolishly, I asked her how about something this week and that's right when her cell phone reception started cutting in and out (she was driving up a canyon area). Anyways, I really think she's trying to phase me out because it's been three days since I said the ball was in her court and already half the week is almost up. I have had no contact with her since then. It used to be where we'd text several times a day and now nothing. Crap...

 

[DJorBUST]

Also, my temptation is to call or text her something that would see if she's totally ignoring me or if there still is a line of communication. But, I know that texting and calling her as her interest is plummeting might not be the best thing to do. Im going to just let her make the next move (whatever that may be) and date these other two girls. One of them is smoking hot. I wish I would have met her when my mind was clear and I could have really gotten more into her instead of turning her into a sideshow.

 

[B4IFURU18?]

Good plan DJ, as long as you have a rotation, you should be fine. You're definitely capable of pulling women. Don't worry so much. You'll get it out of your system.

 

[DJorBUST]

Good plan DJ, as long as you have a rotation, you should be fine. You're definitely capable of pulling women. Don't worry so much. You'll get it out of your system.

Thanks man.