"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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any ideas there about girl moving it too slow?

snake2

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Hello, I am new in this forum...i need an advice here (as always)

I met a girl she is 23, i am 26 and she was very charming and flirty...anyway i dated her twice and she seemed to play along, kino escalation and all that.

Problems with her attitude are though that she never calls me, i call her or anyway i am always making the first approach there is nothing that she has initiated that far...

She is very inclined to rescheduling all the time, i get a headache everytime that i try to arrange anything with her...

the last week she did not contact me for one whole week...i let that be and she finally did send ONE message, this must be the first time and an exception though...

anyway i suggested her we should go out and she suggested meeting for shopping (boring!:yawn:) because she could not make it for the night, what to do to speed her up a little bit? she is cheerful to hear me all that, but i do not get any action here...
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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oscarxp25

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Sunshine Girl= A girl who flirts with you and gives you signals but doesn't follow through with you trying to advance the relationship. The above post is right, go find another one and stop wasting time.
 

bigneil

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snake2 said:
i dated her twice and she seemed to play along, kino escalation and all that.
Kino Escalation?? In other words you didn't even kiss her?
 

SgtSplacker

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Dude if shes is interested in you she will make time for you. She will constantly think about you. She will make plans and be excited to include you in them. Plain and simple, end of story.

Girls can be nice to guys for no less than 1,000 self serving reasons. What you are after is only one thing. To be her #1... and you're not with this girl unfortunately. Move on.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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snake2

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Kino Escalation?? In other words you didn't even kiss her?
kino escalation and all that.
included in all that...we had a small make out session towards the end of the second date, i called her the next day, we talked, i told her to arrange a date to see her again, then she responded after a week... ( i did not call her in this week)

what confuses me is that she is always warm when we talk and she was very flirty also (at least when we are too together), when we are not she is too passive for my taste, "shopping?" please!!:nervous:

not sure if i should next her or give her another chance? or just freeze and call back in one month? perhaps she gets the message?

What you are after is only one thing. To be her #1... and you're not with this girl unfortunately. Move on.
yes you are probably right, she is treating me something like me being an option here; or that's my idea...so there is defintely something in the picture which does not seem right...
 

bigneil

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snake2 said:
What confuses me is that she is always warm when we talk.
I see, so because she's "always warm" when you TALK you assume she'll marry you, and now you're understandably confused.

A girl can f*ck you on your last night together, and then dump you on the ride home a few hours later. Measure her interest by how willing she is to go on the NEXT date, not how "warm" she was last time.
 

snake2

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bigneil said:
I see, so because she's "always warm" when you TALK you assume she'll marry you, and now you're understandably confused.

A girl can f*ck you on your last night together, and then dump you on the ride home a few hours later. Measure her interest by how willing she is to go on the NEXT date, not how "warm" she was last time.
good point * things are starting to clear up a little bit - perhaps i like her too much, if no i would not have been so...you know..
 

Pimp-sicle

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Ahhh the classic NEXXT NEXXT NEXXT response that is the staple response of 99% of guys on this main discussion forum.

Here's my take:

1) Yes, she is obviously dating others and its pretty clear that she gets attention and is use to making guys pursue her

2) You need to have options as well, so you aren't focusing too much time and energy on this ONE GIRL. Two dates bro; that's nothing. Keep meeting new girls and talking to her at the same time.

3) Until you phuck a girl, they rarely initiate much contact. However if she is receptive to your calls/texts and dates then you are over-analyzing



I wouldn't NEXT her, but I would pull back a bit and see if she starts showing more interest.

In the mean time bide your time by meeting new girls and hanging out with your friends.







PIMP
 

Iceberg

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Pimp-sicle said:
Ahhh the classic NEXXT NEXXT NEXXT response that is the staple response of 99% of guys on this main discussion forum.

Here's my take:

1) Yes, she is obviously dating others and its pretty clear that she gets attention and is use to making guys pursue her

2) You need to have options as well, so you aren't focusing too much time and energy on this ONE GIRL. Two dates bro; that's nothing. Keep meeting new girls and talking to her at the same time.

3) Until you phuck a girl, they rarely initiate much contact. However if she is receptive to your calls/texts and dates then you are over-analyzing



I wouldn't NEXT her, but I would pull back a bit and see if she starts showing more interest.

In the mean time bide your time by meeting new girls and hanging out with your friends.

Exactly what I was thinking. You shouldn't Next the girl just because she has options. You just can't make this girl your #1 option.

Build a rotation of women, keep her in the game, and see what happens. But by no means whatsoever should you alter your plans for this woman. She is not girlfriend material...at least not any time soon. She has a high probability of flaking....probably because she has one or two guys higher on her priorities than you.

The only thing you can do is cool down, and don't pursue too hard. There's nothing you can do to speed her up, snake2. All you can do is slow down your interest...and perhaps she'll believe that she's falling down a few notches on your priorities list.

I understand the Nexting advice. You don't want to have high interest in a girl who's not returning it. But on the other hand, in reality, why should this girl have high interest?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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nismo-4

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Iceberg said:
Exactly what I was thinking. You shouldn't Next the girl just because she has options. You just can't make this girl your #1 option.

Build a rotation of women, keep her in the game, and see what happens. But by no means whatsoever should you alter your plans for this woman. She is not girlfriend material...at least not any time soon. She has a high probability of flaking....probably because she has one or two guys higher on her priorities than you.

The only thing you can do is cool down, and don't pursue too hard. There's nothing you can do to speed her up, snake2. All you can do is slow down your interest...and perhaps she'll believe that she's falling down a few notches on your priorities list.

I understand the Nexting advice. You don't want to have high interest in a girl who's not returning it. But on the other hand, in reality, why should this girl have high interest?
Don't guys on this board realize that all women always have options?
 

snake2

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thank you all for the great advice...it helps to build a self esteem...

anyway i texted her to cancel the shopping date, she called back asking what happened (yes!), i told her i am not interested in shopping activities (suddenly i felt like saying: what am I? a hanger? ) and i told her we should better arrange it to go at a bar and chill out when she feels like having time...she asked "when do you say?", I told her "Wednesday", she said okay...

she just text me "is it okay to make that a coffee earlier in the evening?"

I really want to call and start swearing her! is she serious? should i give in? I am 50-50 to answer NO that's not okay, and NO that's not what i proposed so until you come up with an answer to what i said "hello"...and still i feel i might lose my chance here...
she is driving me nuts...

*cooling down a bit perhaps i should not care that much? and still go...have no idea why she is making me so pissed but she is..probably not a good sign ha?
 
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Zerro

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Tell her that you can't do the coffee and that you'll be at the bar no matter what. If she's interested she'll show up on your terms.
 
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