Another fvcked up situation with g/f

[Duracell_Bunny]

We've been together for about a year. All is well, she bends over backwards and does too much for me.

I'm currently living in my own place alone, she lives with her parents (about a 20min drive).

Last night she appeared to have a total break down. For a while she's been wanting for us to get a mortgage togther. I made it very clear that I am not ready.

This re-occured last night while chatting on the phone, she was giving it all that "whats up? somethings wrong" when I was fine, just a little tierd. She brought up the subject again, saying how peed of she is that she has to spend so much on petrol each month to stay over at mine. Yet she's being doing this for a year and only just started complaining now.

When it came across that we have different needs, she told me she wants to see me every day, became excessivly emmotional when I said I'm not ready to live together with her. Then she started going on about all of this "Your the bestest things thats ever happened to me, I want to spend the rest of my life with you." When she asked me if I wanted to I kind of stumbled with an unclear answer - that set her off even more that she burst out and hung up on me. She text moments after, of which I told her to call me instead of speaking over text. Of which we then continued talking about all this crap for another hour.

This chick is great, to be honest she if wife material although it is way too soon for me. I do not want to settle, I've had a life turn around when I broke up with my ex some time ago and I want to live a little. I don't want to be stripped of all my freedom and be tied down financially.

She has taken the whole thing that I don't have any interest in her and now things between us feel very awkward.

Should I just call it quits? She is an awsome girlfiend that it will be hard to find another one who treats me as well as she does, just putting me under so much stress right now and I feel a bit tied down. Its just too much.

The thing is, if I was say in my 30s I would accept and move in with her.

 

[Tiguere]

stand your ground. your house is a sugar bowl and your girlfriend is a ****aroach. once the ****aroach enters the sugarbowl there is not getting out. dont be a pvssy and stand your ground.

 

[thinkinblue613]

Wow... She's already trying to make those big decisions for you and you guys aren't even living together or married. Big no-no. Just because your relationship is good, it doesn't mean you need to get a mortgage together.

Don't back down, stay strong man and if she really cares about you, she'll understand. If she leaves, she was being selfish and is off to the next sucker.

Also, you're 26 man... You got at least another 5-10 years before you should decide on settling down.

 

[DavenJuan]

having a wonderful girlfriend is one thing, however making a decision to do something that you really dont want to do is another.

Unfortunately, this relationship may have run its course. I dont imagine that this woman will "suddenly" come to terms with your decision, especially if this hasnt happened yet. It seems that you have made it perfectly clear on what it is that you want, and she is going to pressure you until you do SOMETHING.

Dont convince yourself that you can change her mind. She wants certain things, and it seems you've made it clear to her, that you are just not ready for what shes looking for. There isnt anything ELSE you can say that will make it clearer.

 

[garruk]

ive been in your shoes before.

the key here is to make her think you're ARE moving in that direction (which isnt a lie).

from her point of view, shes on a schedule. shes not getting any younger and if something happens to the relationship, her chances of finding someone new continue to dwindle as time goes on.



make her think you're moving in that direction.

tip that worked for me: buy her one of those really expensive electric toothbrushes and leave it at your place for her. thats something my friend taught me and it bought me another 6 months before the discussion of moving in together came up.

 

[Duracell_Bunny]

having a wonderful girlfriend is one thing, however making a decision to do something that you really dont want to do is another.

Unfortunately, this relationship may have run its course. I dont imagine that this woman will "suddenly" come to terms with your decision, especially if this hasnt happened yet. It seems that you have made it perfectly clear on what it is that you want, and she is going to pressure you until you do SOMETHING.

Dont convince yourself that you can change her mind. She wants certain things, and it seems you've made it clear to her, that you are just not ready for what shes looking for. There isnt anything ELSE you can say that will make it clearer.

I definetly will not be changing my mind. I have always felt like I've been capable of getting a better girl in terms of a better figure and dress sense (don't get me wrong, my current chick isn't overweight or anything like that).

If I was given the chance to date other women I find that exciting.

Although what worries me if the relationship does come to close, its not being alone but how hard and frustrating it will be to find another high quality prospect. I may not find another person who has so much respect for me.

Then again, I guess she could only have been treating me so well as she's after something.

I just know that she's going to keep bringing this up over and over. It's upsetting for her, and stressful for me. It makes me ponder how this relationship can work like this.