Another ex girlfriend thread.

[justanothernormalguy]

Right, so we broke up roughly 3 months ago. I was clingy, needy and showed all afc traits. I'm not here to understand why she broke up with me, those reasons are already very clear. He'll, I don't even blame her for it. However, after the breakup, I made it incredibly easy for her to move on and get over me. I didn't stop contact, initiated and reacted to arguments, asked for her back...the list could go on. Everything I knew I shouldnt do, I did. I wouldn't trade that experience considering how much I learned.

After a month of wallowing in my own self pity, I decided to improve myself. Hit the gym etc...met about 5 new girls who I gamed with ease, that was never my problem, it was what I turned into when i had them.

Now, I haven't met someone who compares to my ex though, I have plates who are keen but I'm just not happy enough with the breakup yet.


Now here's my problem, every time she contacts me, all my knowledge, principles and ideas go out the window and I over do it. I'm keen, interested and make it clear to her shes better off without me.

Let's face it, I want another shot at it, at least until something way more exciting comes along but that could be a long wait. I could lie to myself and tell myself to get over it, but why should i? Its human nature to want what you cant have, and thats what i want so why not persue. I can keep other plates spinning in the mean time anyway. It doesn't affect my every day life not having her, I don't think about her much but obviously it's still there and I figure one last good shot at it might help, then I can call it quits.

I'm sure she would be fine never speaking to me again as im certain she's
over me, so no contact isn't too much an option. I obviously need to initiate without coming across needy or as if I'm still into her. So how do I go about this? Ask her to go for a coffee and catch up? Last time I contacted her was early august so I figure, leave two months from then with no contact whatsoever and go for early October? In that time make myself look as best and feel great about myself, gym haircut new clothes etc....

Now my questions are, how do I make her see the new me. I know completely how I would play a relationship with her, but the trouble is getting there and it's what I keep completely screwing up.

So how do I Initiate contact, when, and how do I behave when/if she contacts me before I do in a few months?

 

[pdx1138]

Don't do it man.

Keep your dignity.

You will get over it eventually. Think of it this way, you could easily end up meeting the girl of your dreams before october....then you wouldn't be thinking this way.

move on, be a man.

 

[justanothernormalguy]

See, I realise this, but part of me will always feel the need to try for this girl, and I don't want to sabotage my future with other girls. So i figure one
Last go at trying to get her back will get her out of my system. Let's say I lost my v to this girl

 

[Iceberg]

See, I realise this, but part of me will always feel the need to try for this girl, and I don't want to sabotage my future with other girls.

No. It won't.

I've been there before. And you think it'll be there always, but it won't. Not even close.

So i figure one
Last go at trying to get her back will get her out of my system. Let's say I lost my v to this girl

You lost your virginity to her? Well, everyone loses their virginity somewhere. Doesn't mean you're joined together for life.

You're going to whatever you want. It just seems like a waste of time to write a 5-paragraph post about your ex, if all you're gonna do is go running right back to her.

What was your goal? To ask for our permission?

 

[pdx1138]

I understand, I've been there myself...it's the hardest thing to do.

It would be much better if you made no effort.

It's highly probable she will drunk dial you in the next few months, then you can have some fun with her.

I had that happen to me, but my damn phone battery was dead when she called late and left a msg, so I missed the opportunity.

But you really shouldn't be initiating the contact with her...trust me. You'll be better off.