Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

An Inner-Game Definition & Developement Strategy

Johnny Soporno

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A whole lot of wanna-be Players, Pick Up Artists ('PUAs'), and Seducers out there have been rushing into the scene in the last year or so, since The Game was released on the unsuspecting public...

It's tragic to watch as these new entrants into our wonderful Game, instead of ACTUALLY becoming Players, become 'Playas'; instead of Pick Up Artists, they become 'Pick Up Technique Zealots' ('PUTZs'); and instead of becoming Seducers, they become 'Womanizers'.

Ironically, although The Game is CLEARLY a condemnation of the jejune and hollow lives of most of its participants, an amazing number of people appear to have missed this message, instead only being intrigued by the notion of getting laid by hotter/more/any women.

In an effort to prevent spiritual and psychological decay amongst the people whom this community most stands to serve, I am going to attempt to frame things in such a way as to help neophytes and experienced participants alike to evolve into this gradually, rather than rushing in like proverbial fools.

Here goes:

"Inner Game" is a convenient euphemism for having a "Satisfied Sense-of-Self". The more richly developed you are AS A PERSON, the less crafty and manipulative you need to be as a Player, and the less you need to justify that you DESERVE the playboy lifestyle you have chosen.

Once you wrap your mind around this, everything falls into place: Inner Game isn't something you get taught, it isn't something you study - it's something you must EARN!

The irony is, ONLY YOU can award it to yourself.

This Self-Confidence is like Freedom: You must EARN it - it can't be bought, borrowed, or stolen, nor can it be given away.
(When Freedom is GIVEN to you, that's ACTUALLY abandonment. Think about it!)

By earning your OWN respect, and satisfying yourself that you are becoming more fully-realized with each new experience you have, you begin TRULY to like yourself.

We're all looking to live as playboys, but there is nothing innately positive about the 'worthless playboy' stereotype. Oh, it LOOKS like fun, but it's empty and shallow...

The paradigm I recommend alternatively is "Worthy Playboy" and I elaborate on it further now:

To become a 'Worthy Playboy' you must develop yourself as a Renaissance Man; you should endeavour to gain a broad-base of knowledge in areas you believe people who'd interest you will be versed. This will help you to remain interesting to them also; as being interesting is INFINITELY more attractive than being 'impressive'.

As a Worthy Playboy, you should be comfortable and confident enough to carry on conversations with women on subjects you have historically known nothing about, by candidly and sincerely encouraging them to share THEIR insights with you.
NEVER FORGET: Everyone's favourite subject is themselves, and NOTHING makes you more attractive to another person than being INTERESTED in what they have to say. This works for men and women alike - but women are far more impressed when they receive this attention from men (since most men are usually too arrogant to concede they might not know everything... Schmucks.)

A Worthy Playboy is never ashamed of NOT KNOWING, because A) no one can know everything, and B) women will be DELIGHTED that their knowing something you don't isn't intimidating to you - and they will be flattered that you're man-enough to let them teach something to you.
"Know Thyself" said The Oracle, and that was profound advice - FOR SELF-DECEPTION IS THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL.

Introspectively interrogate yourself to discover WHO YOU ARE as you develop - to ensure you haven't lost sight of yourself.

Once you KNOW who you are, you'll know what you'll do.

IF YOU ONLY DO THE THINGS WHICH MAKE SENSE TO YOU, in which you find yourself BOTH cerebrally and emotionally settled, and where your conscience is unperturbed, YOU'LL BE ACTING WITH 'REASONED CONFIDENCE'.

This is the rational way of leading your life - by following these internal guidlelines, you'll NEVER have reason for regret, and no justification for embarrassment, EVEN if things don't work out immediately! (In such cases, dispassionately step back from the experience, return to the plan to see whether the problem was situational or persistant, and modify as-necessary before trying again.)

By proceeding ONLY with Reasoned Confidence, the only guilt you need EVER feel is the guilt of letting yourself down; the ONLY embarrassment, the embarrassment of making the same mistakes over again; the ONLY regret, the regret of not having come to this epiphany earlier.


Promise yourself regularily, "I will never do anything I wouldn't do" - and keep that promise faithfully - your internal consistency and congruency depends on it. Your ethical system should NOT have a 'margin release key' - that is the road to conscious hypocrisy (See "Self-Deception" above) and is nothing less than personal treason.

Explore your world - expand your horizons, develop new friendships with people of high integrity and ethics, and remain true to yourself and your word. Your relationships and your reputation are your strongest weapons in the battle against psychological misery and emotional defeat - make certain they are solid, just, and dependable as best you can.

As you progess, you will become comfortable that ANY PERSON (man or woman) with whom you interact will feel and be better-off for knowing you [even if it's simply because you proved to them that GOOD MEN still exist, and find THEM interesting] and that they will feel better about themselves because they've spent time with you.

What could be a more-attractive attribute to have?

Most of all, YOU MUST BECOME SELF-ACTUALIZED - in other words, you need to find your comfort with yourself based on your confidently and successfully following your own path, and NOT narcissistically through the approval of others.

Permitting yourself to be held-back from progressing because you fear the disapproval of people you don't admire is MADNESS!

Lead your own life, and conscientiously ensure you make all your descisions with Reasoned Confidence, and when you are met with disapproving or taunting jibes from 'the peanut gallery' just take note of it - then

DO AS YOU WILL, and watch as your detractors become your admirers. There's no arguing with success.

Good luck to you all,

I hope you find value in this.

Johnny Soporno
Worthy Playboy
 

DJVladdy

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You summed up many of my recent realizations my friend..
I began getting used to doing something that i can tell vast majority of men do not do. You talked about reasoned confidence.

To see, hear, touch... PERCIEVE the world through the lens of my own reality.

I walk on the streets, and take a look at random guys walking (large university campus, all that jazz you know), or on the streets, where have you... I can tell by their eyes that they are lost in the realm of someone of something else, and are uncomfortable there. (aka AFC, chump, simp, all same sh!t)... But about 2 years ago, before sosuave, i met my eye doctor, and without him even saying much I was sure he was some kind of a pimp/mack on the side, besides optometry lol. In the physical sense not much special about him except good hair. Then I was like so why does he seem like a pimp... only after 2 years i pretty much have an answer.

Another thing which is related... is being completely honest honest to yourself
 

Part Weston

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I love the post man. I agree with a lot of it and I am trying to achieve what you are preaching.

On a side note, did you ever read any of Ayn Rand? I was reminded of some of her stuff when I read your post.
 

Johnny Soporno

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Part Weston said:
I love the post man. I agree with a lot of it and I am trying to achieve what you are preaching.
Thanks so much, Vladdy and PW :)

If you are striving for it, YOU ARE ALREADY SUCCEEDING - that's the most important thing to keep in mind :)

Part Weston said:
On a side note, did you ever read any of Ayn Rand? I was reminded of some of her stuff when I read your post.
When people ask me to describe myself, I often explain I'm the 'spiritual offspring' of four ENTP characters from mid-Twentieth century science fiction:
Take equal measures of Jubal Harshaw (favour-broker/literary philosopher), a blend of Francisco d'Anconia (faux-worthless playboy/revolutionary) & Henry Reardon (diehard industrialist/inventor), and top it off with 1/3rd James T. Kirk (Action hero)

;)

Johnny Soporno
Worthy Playboy
 

Magma

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I've always advocated for a focus on inner game as the primary driving force in one's personal development. This is a Bible-worthy post, indeed. Thanks for the booster. We all need one from time to time...
 

image

"If you love women, you must read the SoSuave Guide to Women. It's fantastic!"

Mimicita

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Part Weston said:
I love the post man. I agree with a lot of it and I am trying to achieve what you are preaching.

On a side note, did you ever read any of Ayn Rand? I was reminded of some of her stuff when I read your post.
Ah, it makes me so happy to see that someone so young (only 16) understands things that people three times his age have trouble grasping. Don't misunderstand, PW, this is really meant as a sincere compliment :)
 

Duke

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Man, I really love this post. It's like a summation of what sosuave is all about -- what separates this place from every other seduction site. The focus is on living for YOURSELF, NOT for women.

I'm definitely bookmarking this.

Rock on.

-Duke
 

DJ Shaka

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Johnny Soporno said:
Permitting yourself to be held-back from progressing because you fear the disapproval of people you don't admire is MADNESS!
Great quote!
 

Atom Smasher

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Johnny,

There are a lot of guys in here who can't even get a foothold with women. There is something about them that cause women to instinctively not be attracted to them, and these guys, cannot, in any way, shape or form, figure out what that factor is.

Therefore, their lives are filled with immediate, obvious rejection before they can even strike up a conversation.

Working on and making improvements in the inner game is essential, but what do these guys do in the meantime? Take a guy who is embarking on the journey to becoming that rennaisance man. He's working on himself and he's making strides and just starting to develop self-respect. But his harsh reality is that when it comes to women, he's still met with insta-rejection wherever he goes. B!tch shields and even hostility galore.

What does he do in this interim period? He wants to relate to women in an authentic way, to take genuine interest in people, but he just can't get a foothold and practice because he is still projecting that impossible to identify aura that is turning women off.

Any thoughts?
 

loveshogun

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Good points on all sides

Atom Smasher said:
Johnny,

There are a lot of guys in here who can't even get a foothold with women. There is something about them that cause women to instinctively not be attracted to them, and these guys, cannot, in any way, shape or form, figure out what that factor is.

Therefore, their lives are filled with immediate, obvious rejection before they can even strike up a conversation.

Working on and making improvements in the inner game is essential, but what do these guys do in the meantime? Take a guy who is embarking on the journey to becoming that rennaisance man. He's working on himself and he's making strides and just starting to develop self-respect. But his harsh reality is that when it comes to women, he's still met with insta-rejection wherever he goes. B!tch shields and even hostility galore.

What does he do in this interim period? He wants to relate to women in an authentic way, to take genuine interest in people, but he just can't get a foothold and practice because he is still projecting that impossible to identify aura that is turning women off.

Any thoughts?

Atom Smasher, you make a good point. AFCs as the ones you mention have nothing going for them, so they need that moment of empowerment to attract them to the path.

But, reality is reality. I've been in that situation myself - pretty sure we all have. It took years of development to get where I am, and I STILL have a ways to go.

But let's remember that the key was never "how" to do something. Deep down, we all knew "how."

We just didn't want it badly enough.

We made excuses not to take the strong path. Being horny buggers, we decided to go for easy lays (cough college cough) instead of improving ourselves and moving to bigger ponds with more beautiful fish.

This is why, as the OP said, the PUA and Seduction community became so popular - it was an "easy" fix for a problem we all had with ourselves, because you'll never sell anything to anyone by telling them they're not good enough as they are. It's a shame, really.

No one should ever say that any of this is easy, because it's not. But it's not impossible, and you get better at it.

It comes down to how badly someone wants to improve their life. And it may sound harsh, but if they're not willing to put in the work, they don't deserve a better life.

To all people under the age of 25, be the 2.0 version of yourself. No one's gonna do it for you.
 

Imusculine

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So true...

This is a really good post, man!!!

Large numbers of people live with a mask on, masks that resemble others. When they make new friends, get that hotty they have always craved for, they do not realise until later that everyone fell in love with the mask...they fell in love with Pook, they fell in love with Bred Pitt and so on....

Great post, it pretty much sums up what Game is about and how to get good at it.

Just improve yourself, be your improved self, live by your own rules and live YOUR life and nobody else's...

See yah!
 

kingxxxman

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Johnny has truly been contributing to the site and hopefully more people with his insight post instead of a bunch of fakes that are just recycling old and sometimes terrible advice.
 
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