"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Am I Unemployable?

Which of the five options below should I do? More info in post.

  • Option A

    Votes: 2 25.0%
  • Option B

    Votes: 3 37.5%
  • Option C

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Option D

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Option E

    Votes: 3 37.5%

  • Total voters
    8

Joe The Homophobe

Master Don Juan
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Good thing you are keeping your head up. I can't say the same thing about me. I have been unemployed for 5 months, I have applied to like 20 stores i have run out of places to apply to. I recently applied to 3 more last week so hopefully I get a call for an interview this new week starting tomorrow. If I don't get a call it is probably over I won't get a job. I applied to all the big chains and the little stores rarely hire anyone new so this is why If I don't get a call this new week it is over. I had 3 job interviews and I failed in all 3, i blame myself. I have very little money left on my account so life sucks at the moment I feel cursed. Good thing I live with my parents but having no money and job sucks. I have to stay away from girls since I can't afford having a girlfriend at the moment, got no money to buy anything for myself.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Engetsu

Senior Don Juan
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I chose option B.

You probably didn't get the job because you said that you were "tired of working with meat", which doesn't seem like a very serious answer to give to an interviewer. It gave off the impression that you cannot tolerate minor discomfort (or even less... I mean COME ON, working with MEAT???) and that you may be high-maintenance, which isn't a quality that they are looking for in a minimum-wage job candidate.

The best reason for quitting a job is school. Next time they ask you, say that you wanted to concetrate on studies better. Now that your studies are done, you may work again. That way, you show that you quit for a reason that CANNOT come up again, since you finished school.

Also, if you have no experience, try volunteering. If I were you, I'd try a hospital, or a retirement home, or something like that. Keep in mind that anything less than 50 hours of volunteer work won't be seen as something serious by future employers.

My 2 cents.
 

Abbott

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Originally posted by Engetsu
I chose option B.

You probably didn't get the job because you said that you were "tired of working with meat", which doesn't seem like a very serious answer to give to an interviewer. It gave off the impression that you cannot tolerate minor discomfort (or even less... I mean COME ON, working with MEAT???) and that you may be high-maintenance, which isn't a quality that they are looking for in a minimum-wage job candidate.

The best reason for quitting a job is school. Next time they ask you, say that you wanted to concetrate on studies better. Now that your studies are done, you may work again. That way, you show that you quit for a reason that CANNOT come up again, since you finished school.

Also, if you have no experience, try volunteering. If I were you, I'd try a hospital, or a retirement home, or something like that. Keep in mind that anything less than 50 hours of volunteer work won't be seen as something serious by future employers.

My 2 cents.
You do have a point, but unfortunately at the time I was in a hurry to quit. It's a long story which I don't think is important to the topic at hand. I will admit that I didn't think very carefully and that I honestly was trying to come up with a reason on the spot when my boss, at the time, asked me why I planned to quit. I probably wouldn't be so hasty in the future, but there's nothing I can do about it now.

Let's just say that the reason I quit that job was a lot more complicated than the meat thing. Much, much more complicated.

Why is being high-maintenance bad? It means that I care about details. I am somewhat high-maintenance, I will admit to that. But I'm proud of it, not ashamed. There's no way in hell that I'm going to go out in public without showering, doing my hair, and making sure my clothes and socks match, even if it's something simple like going to the post office to get my mail.

Perhaps the school thing is a good reason, but in my case it does not apply. Right now I'm still in school, attending some classes part-time, on a schedule that easily lends itself to a working man. And when I finish my Associate's degree, I'll be attending some four-year school part-time, presumably while working.

Did I say that I was finished with school? I'm fairly sure I didn't. If so, then I apologize for any confusion.

The school thing is a great idea though, if you're the right person (namely, someone who never works while attending school, which isn't most people I don't think).


Ben
 

Abbott

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Originally posted by MetalFortress
"Why is being high-maintenance bad? It means that I care about details."

No, it means that you're hard to maintain, not that you work hard at maintaining your job duties.
What do you mean? As in being a difficult person to work with?

Ben
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Engetsu

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Originally posted by Abbott
What do you mean? As in being a difficult person to work with?

Ben
Exactly. By the way, I'm not asking you to change; I'm just telling you to bend your reality during a job interview so you get the job. Keeping a minimum-wage job isn't that hard unless you have an I.Q. of 45 and sign your name with an "x". :D
 
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