Am I screwed because of height?

[sfalexi]

I'm a 5'4" male. I'm in great shape (cut, strong), very active, however it seems to me that the more I look around, the more I notice just how short I am.

I talked to some of my buddies about it (who all get tons of chicks, and ironically enough, are all 6' or taller). They even mention that often they get compliments on how tall they are.

To make it even worse, whenever I go out, it's with them, so I'm starting to wonder that if girls ARE looking at us, I look even smaller in direct comparison to them.

Also, my recent luck has been getting that good 'ol friends line, followed by, "Besides, no offense, but you're a little too short for me."

Sucks, eh? Any advice on how to overcome?

 

[SexPDX]

Originally posted by sfalexi
Any advice on how to overcome?

Unfortunately, I can't relate to you enough to give you very much advice since I am 6'2''. I'll leave that to the shorter guys to help you out.

However, I will say this. Whatever you do to OVERCOME, make sure you don't OVERCOMPENSATE by bragging, acting like a hotshot, badass, etc.. I see a lot of shorter guys do this and it's transparent what they are doing and they look like idiots because of it.

Don't worry though, plenty of shorter guys get women. Hopefully you'll get some good advice.

-PDX

 

[Alpine]

I'm 5' 6" and it's not been a major problem, but certainly it's a negative.

I went to a wedding recently and there was this guy there with his wife. He looked like the guy in fantasy island but about 5 foot. His wife was about 5 8 and a looker.

I spent much time quizzing them both, trying to learn from them, but there was nothing I could find that would say yeah that's why.

Also at 5' 4 there are lots of girls in that height range, and it sounds like you have plenty things going for you.

 

[Craig Reeves]

No matter who you are, there will always be SOMETHING about you that SOME women will not like.

What you need to do is to keep looking and don't let your height stop you from doing that. Don't let your height get in the way of your confidence and just keep meeting women, you'll find the right one. There's plenty of hot women out there who wouldn't mind dating somebody of your height.

 

[Fatality]

Re: Re: Am I screwed because of height?

Originally posted by SexPDX

However, I will say this. Whatever you do to OVERCOME, make sure you don't OVERCOMPENSATE by bragging, acting like a hotshot, badass, etc.. I see a lot of shorter guys do this and it's transparent what they are doing and they look like idiots because of it.

That's odd, I see that more from the tall guys.

Why is it that everytime a shorter guy shows extreme confidence or arrogance people automatically think he is trying to prove something?

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Originally posted by sfalexi
I'm a 5'4" male. I'm in great shape (cut, strong), very active, however it seems to me that the more I look around, the more I notice just how short I am.

I talked to some of my buddies about it (who all get tons of chicks, and ironically enough, are all 6' or taller). They even mention that often they get compliments on how tall they are.

To make it even worse, whenever I go out, it's with them, so I'm starting to wonder that if girls ARE looking at us, I look even smaller in direct comparison to them.

Also, my recent luck has been getting that good 'ol friends line, followed by, "Besides, no offense, but you're a little too short for me."

Sucks, eh? Any advice on how to overcome?

LOL! Compliments on being tall??? "Hey, nice job on being tall there!" haha that's so stupid.

I'm about average, maybe a little bit below average in height. Honestly, the only thing you can possibly do is fix your attitude. Most of the problem associated with being short is mental. If you fix that, you're sailing in good waters. However, I will admit that there is still a negative you cannot make up for. But I'd say that this is only 10-15% of the problem. Fix your attitude and 85-90% of the problem is fixed.

In regards to that 85-90%, don't sweat it. If a girl is so shallow that she won't date you because you're not 6'+, then you're better off without her. It's HER loss, not yours. She's losing out on a good catch and you're losing out on a shallow girl......so tell me now who's really the one losing out here? I'm willing to put a lot on the line in saying that if a girl is very picky about height, she's probably going to be a spoiled catch. I've never known an overall nice girl who was very picky about height. All of them were bi1tches, or has some other serious issues.

peace

 

[SexPDX]

Re: Re: Re: Am I screwed because of height?

Originally posted by Fatality
Why is it that everytime a shorter guy shows extreme confidence or arrogance people automatically think he is trying to prove something?

Pretty much everyone who shows arrogance is trying to prove something or make up for something they feel they lack.

Confidence, OTOH, stems from being comfortable with yourself rather than being insecure. Keep track of the difference.

-PDX

 

[sfalexi]

Not so much "Nice job on being tall" but more along the lines of, "Wow! You're so tall!" and stuff like, "I have to admit, I love the fact that you're so tall!"

You're right about them losing out. The most recent girl is 6 feet tall and we had a great time going out for lunch and drinks, but when she finally caught on that I wanted more than friendship she told me, "No offense, but I wouldn't date a guy shorter than me again. It looks too wierd." Which you're right. EXTREMELY shallow.

Ah well. So now she's messaging me through aol asking why I don't want to hang out anymore and I told her that there was no point. She made it clear she doesn't want more than friendship and I have enough friends. Not to mention that (thanks to this forum) I found out she's the classic "Attention hoar" (misspelled on purpose to avoid censorship, but so as not to cause confusion as to what I'm referring to) with tons of guy friends.

As for attitude, my attitude is pretty good. I'm very easy going, fun-lovin' guy. Just need to get over a little shyness and need to lower my expectations a bit. I know I shouldn't HAVE to, but my expectations are ridiculously high. Especially since all I want is some fun and not exactly looking for marriage anytime soon.

Just that I seem to be suffering from two hard-hitters as far as physical first impressions go. Very short (which looks even WORSE when I'm with my 6'4" buddies), and acne, which I'm a couple surgeries in to try to correct and it's getting better.

Well, here's to finding a good forum and seeing what comes up this Fri/Sat night.

Alexi

 

[Craig Reeves]

I've never known an overall nice girl who was very picky about height.

I've never known a GOOD catch to be very, very, picky about ANYTHING about the way a guy looks.

 

[MetalFortress]

*shrugs* If all else fails, date a chick who is 5'4 or shorter. It's not like there's none of them around. But hey, my girlfriend's mom is 5'7, and her dad is 5'4, so it's possible.

 

[Fatality]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Am I screwed because of height?

Originally posted by SexPDX
Pretty much everyone who shows arrogance is trying to prove something or make up for something they feel they lack.

Confidence, OTOH, stems from being comfortable with yourself rather than being insecure. Keep track of the difference.

-PDX

I'm well aware of the difference.

It just seems to me that anytime a short guy is ****y people say he is just that way because he has little man syndrome or something. When a tall guy is ****y does he have tall man's syndrome?

 

[Alpine]

Yeah, that makes me laugh too.

Like if you're short and say build muscle or become rich your 'overcompensating' for fvcks sake you can't win.

I think there is a primeveil thing about height that in our modern society we forget.

When a shorter guy gets the upperhand over a taller guy it's perceived as aggressive, where as anyone else it wouldn't be an issue. In caveman days the arguement got settled pretty straighforwardly.

 

[WeakMenNeverRise]

To be honest man, this is something that your not going to be able to do anything about. Its possible, but if a girl is hell bent on having a tall guy then the odds are really stacked against you. The bright side is that there are a LOT of females out there. And there are a LOT of females out there who would love to have a good man and can't find one. That said, just make sure you are as tight as you can possibly be, intellectually, physically, spritually, and professionally. Just keep fishing because your bond to come up on something eventually. Keep the faith. I'm about 5'7/8 so while I do have it a lil better than you do I am still a short guy. Just keep the faith man. It'll be alright.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

Yes.

You have to look for women are smaller or your height.You have two stereotypes to deal with...unfortantley.

That you're weak cuz you're small and you won't be able to defend them(even if you get ripped to shreds most girls just like tall guys)and that you have a small penis.

That's why alot guys end up with Napolean complex cuz they want the chics to respect them.

I've seen a lots of smaller guys with attractive women not what i'm getting at.Of course we all see that part but..

I'd be lying if I told you post-HS those guys didn't have a hard time keeping women in check.The b!tches give them hell,they talk behind there back,start sh!t with them in public,provoke them,etc..

-That's from my expereince and what I've seen.

 

[SexPDX]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Am I screwed because of height?

Originally posted by Fatality
When a tall guy is ****y does he have tall man's syndrome?

No, he just has small penis complex. LOL!

-PDX

 

[Cesare Cardinali]

sfalexi wrote:

The most recent girl is 6 feet tall and we had a great time going out for lunch and drinks, but when she finally caught on that I wanted more than friendship she told me, "No offense, but I wouldn't date a guy shorter than me again. It looks too wierd." ... EXTREMELY shallow.

The best way to deal with these types of things is to stop being a wuss about it and have some "extremely shallow" standards of your own.

Would you *really* want to date a girl who's 6 feet tall when you are only 5'4? If you had a choice, would you prefer a 6 foot tall chick? If so, what for? You'll both look like idiots.

You say you are cut and muscular right? Would you date a 300lb girl full of lard with a jiggly cottage cheese a$$? I doubt it. Then aren't you being extremely shallow too? Not really, it's just what you're attracted to. It's the reality. Stop worrying about fair and unfair and work with reality.

The best way to deal with women is to use their own game against them. You should set the standard that you'll only date chicks your height or lower and make that very clear to yourself and to chicks that you're interested in. You should have been the one not interested in the 6 foot amazon woman and reject chicks that are taller.

Then before you know it, you'll have the shorter chicks and the taller ones much more interested in you.

Cesare Cardinali

 

[thejuice]

I think ive said this about a million times but my gf is taller than me. Maybe knowing that will help you out but if it doesnt, date hispanic chicks. They tend to be shorter. But thats if youre not willing to work harder. Height is not an issue if you know how to work a girls mind...thats theres to it

 

[sfalexi]

You say you are cut and muscular right? Would you date a 300lb girl full of lard with a jiggly cottage cheese a$$? I doubt it. Then aren't you being extremely shallow too? Not really, it's just what you're attracted to.

Score one for Cesare. Good point there. You're right.

Guess I can't hold anything against her. No I'm not AGAINST dating a taller chick, but you're right. I guess I just tried and missed. Ah well. Maybe the possible pool is a little smaller for me to pick from, but it's still there.

Guess I just gotta go out and try again this weekend.

 

[UpNCominDJ]

Don't worry about being short. Just worry about macking girls. Find a girl you like and spit some game to her. If she diggs you then close the deal. If she doesn't then don't worry about it. I'm 6'0" and that's how I deal with chics. It doesn't matter if they're 6'2" or 5'2". If she's hot, then try and get them panties.

 

[NewMan]

I'm 5'8" - not super short - but I'm shorter than almost all of my friends.... like you most are in the 6' range...

in my younger days I used to have issues with my height - and hardly dated any chick's.

Now, my last 2 chicks i've been with (4.5 yrs and 1 yrs upto now) have been hotter than any of the girls I've seen my taller friends with.

I've worked hard on my body.

I never cut up, because of my height I like to maintain a large physique in general.

My ex gf was a super hot. She never dated shorter guys - but I got her. It's about attitude. It's about personality. It's about being able to have fun.

Keep doing what your doing. It's more difficult for sure, but you'll just have to compensate for it in other ways.