"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Am I ready to go out sarging?

Canadien

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Hello guys, this is prash from montreal, I am 25 years old and I have listed few facts about my situation down below...

Fact:
1) Never pursued or talked to a girl until last year

2) Introverted personality

3) From south indian family oriented lifestyle...

Ok, down below the the things are listed by the timeline, Most of this stuff here has been going on for about only 3-4 months, so Which one should I focus on more?

a) Joined second language english conversation group

b) Joined and studied a lot of PUA and don Juan material

c) Joined gym

d) Approached strangers in the bus, metro...

e) Joined meetup.com and started participating in various recreational, and cultural events..

f) Joined Toastmaster club to improve public speaking

g) Joined lair community

h) Did hair laser therapy to get rid of hairs that were hurting my looks, now I've got a very good hair style...

i) Started Dance lessons...

J) Joined online dating services like plenty of fish, Lavalife

K) Started talking about this to my personal counselor from the university , all my friends even parents to find sanity in all this...


Despite all that, I still get negative vibes and occurred feelings, when cold approaching, while other guy seems to be able to do it smoothly?
Should I keep on persisting even after a lot of bad results?

Whats the best things that you guys could tell me to work on? Should I slow down?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Analytic

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Why on earth would you want to slow down? you have to keep going. Use that momentum, once you stop it is even harder to start again. Seems like you did alot of things to improve yourself, big props to you.

What you're feeling is normal, I've been there... many times. You just have to keep at it and it will get better.
 

Precursor

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Actually it sounds like you're very prepared. Thats good because you're motivated. I am quite younger than you but i do know motivation is key. All those things you do, i bet a lot of people don't even think about doing.

Of course you should sarge. I believe you are more than ready. Just don't stop doing what you do when you have a woman to occupy your attention.
 

Canadien

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And

Analytic said:
Why on earth would you want to slow down? you have to keep going. Use that momentum, once you stop it is even harder to start again. Seems like you did alot of things to improve yourself, big props to you.

What you're feeling is normal, I've been there... many times. You just have to keep at it and it will get better.

I will be going back to university in September, and I bought a laptop to get entry into cafeteria area, is this a good move?

Is it ok to hold back from sarging, and focus on group activities and work, atleast until school starts?

Before,I used to spent a lot of time in computer room, so what do you guys propose that would expose me to more people? is it ok to just start chatting with everyone?
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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Analytic

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Canadien said:
I will be going back to university in September, and I bought a laptop to get entry into cafeteria area, is this a good move?

Is it ok to hold back from sarging, and focus on group activities and work, atleast until school starts?

Before,I used to spent a lot of time in computer room, so what do you guys propose that would expose me to more people? is it ok to just start chatting with everyone?
Funny you mention that because getting a laptop is one of the best move I've made. I used to stay home all the time on my computer, now that I got a laptop I just go to the coffee shops and work there and when I finish my work I will go out and approuch girls (not yet but will soon)

You're making excuses that you're busy and want to focus on other things. I made that same excuses for at least 4 years and look where it got me. Search for some of my threads and you will see what I meant. Do not make the same mistake I made, you're 25 years old so don't waste your youth anymore. From now on you do everything to the best of your ability, that is approuching girls, making friends whatever. You and I have alot to catch up, trust me on this... once you hit 26-27 you WILL feel regrets.
 

Canadien

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Thanks its always

Analytic said:
Funny you mention that because getting a laptop is one of the best move I've made. I used to stay home all the time on my computer, now that I got a laptop I just go to the coffee shops and work there and when I finish my work I will go out and approuch girls (not yet but will soon)

You're making excuses that you're busy and want to focus on other things. I made that same excuses for at least 4 years and look where it got me. Search for some of my threads and you will see what I meant. Do not make the same mistake I made, you're 25 years old so don't waste your youth anymore. From now on you do everything to the best of your ability, that is approuching girls, making friends whatever. You and I have alot to catch up, trust me on this... once you hit 26-27 you WILL feel regrets.

good to relate to someone else,
as for keeping it light, well I am trying to become comfortable with all this cold approaching stuff, but mind has a tendency of letting you down as you'r about to do something you've feared most of your life.

Its like at one point, I couldn't even talk to girls that approached me, and were seriously interested,.and now, its becoming aggressive in the same aspect, as I'm approaching strangers myself.
I'm very out spoken in my classes,usually talk for 50% of class discussions, so you may see how the girls could be curious and possibly interested in me, its just that I will possibly be targetting girls first time in all of my educational time i've been at school...

Is there anything to look out for in class environment?
 

lyamdb

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All the things you're doing as preperation are good. But they won't make approaching easier for you. Nothing will, except approaching. You can change your life style and looks to attract more girls but approaching will remain as scary as it was, until you actually start doing it.
 

Analytic

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Canadien said:
good to relate to someone else,
as for keeping it light, well I am trying to become comfortable with all this cold approaching stuff, but mind has a tendency of letting you down as you'r about to do something you've feared most of your life.

Its like at one point, I couldn't even talk to girls that approached me, and were seriously interested,.and now, its becoming aggressive in the same aspect, as I'm approaching strangers myself.
I'm very out spoken in my classes,usually talk for 50% of class discussions, so you may see how the girls could be curious and possibly interested in me, its just that I will possibly be targetting girls first time in all of my educational time i've been at school...

Is there anything to look out for in class environment?
If you can participate in class then you can talk to girls. I could never speak out in class but could talk to girls. It's all about pratice. One advice I have for you regarding class is never to date anyone in your class, trust me I've been there and its hell. Once shi t hits the fan you got nowhere to run and are cover with doodoo for the rest of your semester. Just focus on being social and cool in your classes. School is a playground for approuching, walk around and approuch random girls.
 
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