"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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am i playing the game alright?

stillmatic

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i think i am, just want to know other DJ's thoughts.

meet HB through a friend. ignored her for a week after plans fell through when i wanted. contacted me to meet up. met with her for the first time last saturday for drink/talking. told me i should join her at the bar after the date, said "maybe, gonna go back to my friends house to drink and we'll see what happens", didn't go.
she ended with "call me okay?"

things i learned about her:
independent.
doesn't cook
has career and in school
broke up with needy bf
has ALOT guys chasing her
runs daily,works out, smart, blah, blah..
semi bar-star

called her 3 days later (today), around 10pm, she just came home from watching a movie, didn't ask with who...asked me what i did today, blah blah jogging with buddies at the park..asked hewhat's she doing this friday, told me to call her, end with "nah...how about you call me" she responded with " yeah, definitely"

now i'm planning on going to the same bar she goes to on thursday. i'm thinking i shouldn't pay her much attention, party with my friends, even hit up girls around/in front of her, grind with other girls. basically live it up. (is that going to far?)

and WHEN she calls me friday, tell her i've made plans already, to get even for when i wanted to chill the first time.

good game plan to set me apart from the rest?
 
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"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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stillmatic

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oh yeah, that was my first post, its great that i found this site and been an avid lurker for a while. but had to make should i read the bible before i do any posting.
 

Phyzzle

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told me i should join her at the bar after the date, said "maybe, gonna go back to my house to drink and we'll see what happens", didn't go.
What the - ?

You told her you had to go back to your house to sit at the kitchen table alone and drink? How old are you? Sounds like something I'd say, back in my college days.

told me to call her, end with "nah...how about you call me" she responded with " yeah, definitely"
Nope, not even interested women have the aggressiveness/gumption to call you. Don't wait around, just call her yourself.

grind with other girls. (is that going to far?)
Yep. Too far. You can talk with other girls. Flirt a little.

The ultimate situation would be to have girls trying to hang on you while you look mildly annoyed. Then look at this chick you're dating like you need her to rescue you. That happened to me once, led to my 1st ONS.

and WHEN she calls me friday, tell her i've made plans already, to get even for when i wanted to chill the first time.
Heh, this is only the second date. You need to want to wait a little longer to 'get even', if you still want to bother.
 

stillmatic

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Phyzzle said:
What the - ?

You told her you had to go back to your house to sit at the kitchen table alone and drink? How old are you? Sounds like something I'd say, back in my college days.
made a mistake, meant to write "friend's house", i'm 25, the girl is 21.

Phyzzle said:
Nope, not even interested women have the aggressiveness/gumption to call you. Don't wait around, just call her yourself.
but wouldn't that set me apart from the tons of guys who generally call HER? this girl usually has a busy schudule, so when she told me "i have to wake up early saturday, so i dunno call me" i feel this was a good move. i mention to leave out "call me, whenever your free"

Phyzzle said:
Yep. Too far. You can talk with other girls. Flirt a little.

The ultimate situation would be to have girls trying to hang on you while you look mildly annoyed. Then look at this chick you're dating like you need her to rescue you. That happened to me once, led to my 1st ONS.
thats an awesome idea. it seems difficult to setup, any other ideas

Phyzzle said:
Heh, this is only the second date. You need to want to wait a little longer to 'get even', if you still want to bother.
so take the date?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Phyzzle

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but wouldn't that set me apart from the tons of guys who generally call HER?
Maybe, but with all the guys calling her, inviting her to cool places, is she going to do any work to pack up the phone or get a hold of you? Challenge is good, but hot 21 year olders have ADD. You've got to "press your case" or she'll let you drift off.

Aggressive, yet a challenge. Tough balance, eh?

any other ideas
Yeah, I wouldn't stay that long. If you ignore her too much, she'll find it odd. If you talk with her too much, that's like 2 days in a row with her, a little smothering. And remember, she "broke up with needy bf".

so take the date?
Well, you can't seduce her if you don't see her.
 

Metro3pilot

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Yup ...

what the other guys said .... +

you're thinking too much about the game .... sounds like you're doing all

right ....... don't over complicate the situation.... keep it simple and easy, so even a

caveman could do it ! !

:rockon:
 

grinder

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Good game involves a little more subtlety than we sometimes post on these boards. Your overall gameplan is sound, but you don’t have to take it over-the-top literally with grinding other girls around her.

Your overall goal is simply not to focus too much attention on her because, hopefully, in real life, you don’t have that kind of time; and, you have other women you are involved with.

If you really are busy and involved with other women you won’t have to tell her, she’ll know. This is what I call authentic game, meaning, it’s the most solid, legitimate game, because it’s your life, it’s what you are, not what you pretend to be.

Now, the funny part is I think I actually know this chick: or at least there are so many similarities I know the archetype (I’m nowhere near Chicago).

This girl, or type, is interested in fun, something light, and is focused on her career and school. She has options, and is drawn to those who also have options. She does not want an LTR and will run away from you if you start acting like you do.

If she is 23, and tells you she is spending this weekend at a lake with her buddies, well, I’m one of the buddies and I know you are not really in Chicago. LOL
 
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