"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Am I drowning in my own jerkness?

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Timster

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Is there such a thing as being too much of a "jerk"? I mean, I do it in a playful way (with a smile), but I don't know if it offends her -- well, she'll call me a jerk, and stick her tongue out at me and punch my arm (maybe she's just playing along)...is it a postive thing? Does it somehow make her subconsciously attracted it me? Better to be a "jerk" than a clingy, emotional nice guy, right?

I get the impression that she thinks I don't like her...is this to my advantage?

At the end of the night, we give each other a nice, loving hug and it's all good, but the "teasing" and "arrogance" starts up with full force the next time I see her.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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iCanDoThat

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that is exactly what you want. she just playing it back. you have her where you want her. dont forget that your instincts are gonna tell you that your being to mean or you shouldnt pick on her like that, but what you described sounds like youve got her where ya want her. just remember that you would rather lose a chick by being a jerk than a nice guy.

i would say your being to much of a jerk when you start getting girls calling you an @$$h0le and then not talking to you. i get that every once in a while. Dont sweat it if that happens, move on. i think you gotta kind of know your boundries sometimes. i just try and remember to almost always keep a smile on my face if it might come off as being an @$$H0loe.

peace
 
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spider_007

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try not to overdo it tho. even tho it sends one of those subconcious messages (that you don't give a sh1t), it still can hurt. Even tho they are only words.
 
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Kaine

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well, she'll call me a jerk, and stick her tongue out at me and punch my arm (maybe she's just playing along)...is it a postive thing?
Click to expand...

These are all good signs of interest if done in a playful way in return.


Kaine
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Timster

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"Call me tonight and maybe we'll do something. Depending how tired I am. I need to go to bed early tonight in order to make it through a long day tomorrow."

Should I call? If I do, we might hang out and have fun...if not, it will be the first time...and she'll wonder what I'm up to...and I'll keep her on her toes. ;)
 
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StrangeButTrue

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Nah, when in doubt, wait a day. Make up some funny reason you couldn't tomorrow. Only if she asks, of course.
 
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