BrainDamage92
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 30, 2015
- Messages
- 578
- Reaction score
- 51
See I been thinking about some deep **** lately and had some convos with my parents.
See fact is when my brother was born he got all the attention. I was never jealous of that. It almost seemed my parents feel guilty towards him. From since when I was 5 their attitude towards me was: "Meh youre perfect, deal with it and dont bother us." and I kinda grew up kinda fast. I was ****ing acting like my brother's parent all the time and I didnt even realise it while playing my mothers shrink and my fathers best bud at the same time. Also I was always told Im smarter than my brother. What kind of a parent says this. Maybe couse his biological dad was a plummer or something? ****...
I remember the day a doctor was at our house (I was 4 or smth) and said to my mother she is pregnant. I remember the look on my parents faces. "Oh ****" kinda look. I always also noticed how my brother is raised to believe he looks exactly like my father. It was told to him many times, thousands of times, and to me too. Guilty conscionse much? I was made to believe I look like my mother more, when in fact Im a perfect copy of my father, only taller, more handsome and with dark eyes (my mothers genes). Bro has dark eyes too but face, body... Well Im not so sure about anything anymore...
I talked to my mom recently. She told me at one point my father said to her "I take *me* and you take *my brother* and we split!". Hmmmmmmmm.... fishy... Buts its cool, my bro is my bro I will never give up on him.
I also spent 2-3 years with a professional victim girl. She always said "You dont look like your brother". And shes good at reading people its what chamelleons do.
Now I notice how she always claimed she look exactly like her criminal scumbag father (she was brainwashed to believe it like my bro?) who never worked a single day and is using her as a surrogate parent basically. He made her take a loan from the bank only for him to have fun before he goes to jail again. And of course her mother paid the money after this. See hes a manipulative prick man.
And she dont look like him. Eye color, face, body, nothing. She looks much like her mothers father (her grandad) but doesnt resemble anyone from her fathers side at all. Yet she claims it like all the time. Deja vu much? And I met all her family what I say is real.
Now ****s ****ed up man. ****s pretty ****ing ****ed up all the way to the core. I remeber her saying she slept oftenly in the same bed with her father. Also she was raised with her cousin when his parents died. She refers to him as "my brother". Hmmm. She also has a half sister from her mothers previous affair. SHe is happily married and ok but kinda reminds me of myself alot - she has the dark look of a person who knows stuff. ****ed up man.
And I realise how similar the ****ing prof victim is to my mother now, the same freaking brainwash thingy going strong.
Now I dont wanna be the ******* or anything, but I happen to know when people from different sexes with different genes get together - sexual attraction occurs. I dont know man. **** is... I feel like I know truths now and I still ****ing feel obliged to this hoe, couse see how she made me wisen up and I realise I cant talk about that **** with her couse she will go in cry mode and stop listening but then again who else to talk with? Idk man. I just dont know anything anymore.
Life is ****ed up isnt it. Sry Im venting on you but its like I need to write my thoughts down to keep them in check I cant help it...
See fact is when my brother was born he got all the attention. I was never jealous of that. It almost seemed my parents feel guilty towards him. From since when I was 5 their attitude towards me was: "Meh youre perfect, deal with it and dont bother us." and I kinda grew up kinda fast. I was ****ing acting like my brother's parent all the time and I didnt even realise it while playing my mothers shrink and my fathers best bud at the same time. Also I was always told Im smarter than my brother. What kind of a parent says this. Maybe couse his biological dad was a plummer or something? ****...
I remember the day a doctor was at our house (I was 4 or smth) and said to my mother she is pregnant. I remember the look on my parents faces. "Oh ****" kinda look. I always also noticed how my brother is raised to believe he looks exactly like my father. It was told to him many times, thousands of times, and to me too. Guilty conscionse much? I was made to believe I look like my mother more, when in fact Im a perfect copy of my father, only taller, more handsome and with dark eyes (my mothers genes). Bro has dark eyes too but face, body... Well Im not so sure about anything anymore...
I talked to my mom recently. She told me at one point my father said to her "I take *me* and you take *my brother* and we split!". Hmmmmmmmm.... fishy... Buts its cool, my bro is my bro I will never give up on him.
I also spent 2-3 years with a professional victim girl. She always said "You dont look like your brother". And shes good at reading people its what chamelleons do.
Now I notice how she always claimed she look exactly like her criminal scumbag father (she was brainwashed to believe it like my bro?) who never worked a single day and is using her as a surrogate parent basically. He made her take a loan from the bank only for him to have fun before he goes to jail again. And of course her mother paid the money after this. See hes a manipulative prick man.
And she dont look like him. Eye color, face, body, nothing. She looks much like her mothers father (her grandad) but doesnt resemble anyone from her fathers side at all. Yet she claims it like all the time. Deja vu much? And I met all her family what I say is real.
Now ****s ****ed up man. ****s pretty ****ing ****ed up all the way to the core. I remeber her saying she slept oftenly in the same bed with her father. Also she was raised with her cousin when his parents died. She refers to him as "my brother". Hmmm. She also has a half sister from her mothers previous affair. SHe is happily married and ok but kinda reminds me of myself alot - she has the dark look of a person who knows stuff. ****ed up man.
And I realise how similar the ****ing prof victim is to my mother now, the same freaking brainwash thingy going strong.
Now I dont wanna be the ******* or anything, but I happen to know when people from different sexes with different genes get together - sexual attraction occurs. I dont know man. **** is... I feel like I know truths now and I still ****ing feel obliged to this hoe, couse see how she made me wisen up and I realise I cant talk about that **** with her couse she will go in cry mode and stop listening but then again who else to talk with? Idk man. I just dont know anything anymore.
Life is ****ed up isnt it. Sry Im venting on you but its like I need to write my thoughts down to keep them in check I cant help it...
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