"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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All right, so... I'm new. and I need to get my sh*t together.

JackSparrow

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I'm gonna lay it out plain and simple. I'm here for the help, not the bullsh*t.

I'm 22 years old, live in North Carolina, and I've been dating a girl for over a year and a half. Back in October I went to San Francisco for Culinary school and we grew apart. I don't know if I love her anymore. I've cheated on her a few times, which makes me a piece of sh*t, I know. We even broke up a couple of times (no, she doesn't know I cheated on her... and I'm pretty sure she's cheated on me).

It's not a relationship I really want to be in anymore. I just moved back to North Carolina last week and I'm staying with my parents for a couple of months before I go and get my own place. it's the smart thing to do.

I keep looking at other girls and talking to other girls, but my game isn't anywhere what it used to be. I've slipped hardcore.

I'm unemployed at the moment, but I'm not broke at all. I'm going on a job hunt tomorrow. I don't have a car, but that's mostly because I just moved back.

I'm really big into my hobbies. I love movies and really want do make them a career.


I feel like I need a head to toe makeover, guys. That's why I'm here. To start fresh and rebuild.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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bukowski_merit

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JackSparrow said:
I don't know if I love her anymore. I've cheated on her a few times, which makes me a piece of sh*t, I know. We even broke up a couple of times (no, she doesn't know I cheated on her... and I'm pretty sure she's cheated on me).
This is more normal than some guys here want to believe. hows the sex with her? if thats nothing special - it already sounds like the rest is dieing so id let her go....


I just moved back to North Carolina last week and I'm staying with my parents for a couple of months before I go and get my own place. it's the smart thing to do.
im actually back at my parents house for the summer. and can say it def sucks for meeting new women. so i maybe hold on to the 4 that i already have been through life with a little more than i should.

I keep looking at other girls and talking to other girls, but my game isn't anywhere what it used to be. I've slipped hardcore.
this can be expected when youre coming from a somewhat exclusive relationship.


I'm really big into my hobbies. I love movies and really want do make them a career.
if youre very passionate about this - thats a good thing. dont present it as a hobby - present it as a future career. women will accept a broke entertainer b4 any other broke type
 

Cinamon

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Bukowski Merit is right. Most decent women wont go for unemployed guys, unless off course they are trying to make it in an industry that is hard to break in to, then you get bonus points for following your passion/dream!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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GQ_Confidence_1

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What do you really want from a girl? What do you want to look back on in your 20's when it comes to women?

22 is still very young. I think a lot of guys here would have liked to have had this knowledge at that age.

I think its important to get out, see different women, esp women from around the country, or internationally. Personally, I wouldnt be happy or fulfilled if I only saw or dated girls from one city in one state.

I think relationships in your late teens or early 20's can be sort of boring. You don't really know yourself. The other person doesn't know themself. It can take months or years. Might be time better spent on a career, college, travel, voluteering, reading, learning.

You can come back at 25, still plenty of women out there. Might be more focused about what you want. I don't know.

What about a long term goal of getting an actress? I dont think young guys under 25 realize how powerful this information and how rare it is in older guys, 25-30 or older. The average guy doesnt know this stuff. So many older women, 25-30 or older, they'd die for a guy like this. They've seen the afc, typical dater.
 

everywomanshero

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Jack,

You sound far better off than 90% that wash onto this shore hahha Relax dude, I'm sure you'll be OK out there
 

Unbridled_Phoenix

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It may have been to your benefit for her to know you had cheated on her. But since you think (with your gut) that she cheated on you, it's done.

Do what I'm doing-I got out of a long LTR 6 months ago, found this site, applied the teachings, got women in ways I had never got them before, only to arrive at the conclusion that women should be like priority number 7 in life.

What I'm saying is, fvck the dumb sh!t, concentrate on yourself (figuring out where you want to go and what you need to do to get there).
 

MisterMcGee

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Cinamon said:
unless off course they are trying to make it in an industry that is hard to break in to, then you get bonus points for following your passion/dream!
Oh boy. Story of my life :p
 

Joe Stud

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ok OP, it's been a week, did you get the job? if not, and you say you do have $$ right? so... go out and have fun. If they ask what you do, tell you are a chef, but you are between jobs. make a comment like "right now I'm living off my stock dividends, but that cant last forever". A good date idea is cooking them dinner. exude CONFIDENCE.
at 22 they cant expect you to be an established CEO, so you will be ok.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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