"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Age range of woman to date

Heretolearn

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Hey,

What are some stories and preferences.


I used to say depends on the person, but I have never been with a young girl. Also situation would be tough eg. school, dealing wtih their friends etc.

I got a girl's number recently called up and her parents answered and I then found out the girl is 17 and just finished high school.

The parents were none too happy and I felt weird. I know I put this on myself but what are some stories for you guys.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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STR8UP

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If you are over 30 stay away from any kind of relationship with a woman who is under 25.

My last g/f was a VERY mature 23 yr old (I am 34), but as mature as she was her lack of experience with relationships and life in general created a big riff in our relationship.

This on top of having to deal with her immature friend, her parents looking at me like I was a cradle robber, and a few other things make the situation awkward and difficult.

As much as I preach bringing up the age limit I still can't seem to get away from meeting mostly chicks who are in their early 20's. Maybe I need to start hanging out at the bingo hall or something....
 

KarmaSutra

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Originally posted by STR8UP
As much as I preach bringing up the age limit I still can't seem to get away from meeting mostly chicks who are in their early 20's. Maybe I need to start hanging out at the bingo hall or something....
Hey Gramps, maybe you can teach me shuffleboard while sippin' on you geritol smoothie!

All the best,
 

Heretolearn

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what are some things to be wary of and how do you deal with them

eg. their friends and activities
 

STR8UP

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Originally posted by KarmaSutra
Hey Gramps, maybe you can teach me shuffleboard while sippin' on you geritol smoothie!

All the best,
The nurses here at the old folks home usually stock plenty of prune juice, will that do?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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STR8UP

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Originally posted by yendor28
what are some things to be wary of and how do you deal with them

eg. their friends and activities
Like I said, the family can be an obstacle. My last g/f's mom seemed to like me, but I always felt the tension with her dad. I knew he wasn't really cool with his "little girl" dating a guy that was in between her age and his. He never said anything directly to me, but it made me uncomfortable to be around her family.

You also have to be careful with the friends. Even if you find a mature younger woman it doesn't necessarily mean that her friends will be the same way. My ex's best friend was 20 and acted 14 or 15. I couldn't stand to be around her for more than 10 minutes.

As for activities, I was pretty lucky. My last one was pretty flexible as to being introduced into new things. Not too many 23 yr olds can handle hitting the antique stores and such, but mine was a trooper in that aspect.

On the positive side, it can be fun to introduce a younger girl to the world as you know it. It's cool to see how they get excited at discovering things that you have known for years.
 

Bonhomme

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Depends what you want and who she is

For a fling or a lay, anyone legal goes, as long as she's on the "same page," so to speak.

But for a relationship, she should be at least somewhere near my level of maturity. No real way to quantify it. Everybody varies.

Last year I dated a 21 year-old who was frighteningly mature in many ways ... but not so levelheaded about the difference between infatuation and real love. Which actually was a bit of a treat for a while. We ended it on good terms, and remain friends.
 

STR8UP

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Re: Depends what you want and who she is

Originally posted by Bonhomme
Last year I dated a 21 year-old who was frighteningly mature in many ways ... but not so levelheaded about the difference between infatuation and real love. Which actually was a bit of a treat for a while. We ended it on good terms, and remain friends.
That's the biggest problem with the relationship minded chicks on this age group. They still buy the 'knight in shining armour' schtick hook, line, and sinker. It feels GREAT to be fawned over by a youngin' with nice little perkies, but the reality is that even if they are mature in other aspects it doesn't mean that they have a realistic view on relationships.

Like you said, for a lay or a fling anything legal goes. Just avoid making the mistake I did by trying to play the relationship game with a girl in her early 20's. You can potty train a puppy, but unfortunately with a younger girl it is going to take her having SEVERAL owners try to break her in before she stops making messes on the carpet. That's my experience anyway.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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TooColdUlrick

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23-27, college degree, smart, good job, great convo, some fvcking STYLE about her, HB7 or above at first glance. if there's a good vibe, game on. if not, i'm out.
 

TooColdUlrick

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Re: Re: Depends what you want and who she is

Originally posted by STR8UP
That's the biggest problem with the relationship minded chicks on this age group. They still buy the 'knight in shining armour' schtick hook, line, and sinker.
i was talking with a chick on the phone a couple weeks ago. i was watching Spiderman (1) on TV as we were talking and she said something to the effect of:

i loved it when Spiderman swept MJ off her feet and rescued her...i want someone to do that to me

i told her she was living in la-la-land. i think by the time they hit 25ish, most realize that Spiderman is actually fiction. then again, a lot don't.
 

Bonhomme

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Agreed, STR8UP.

The main thing I did right in that thoroughly enjoyable situation was to keep my expectations in line with the reality and simply live in the moment. And what fine moments they were. No regrets whatsoever, and I highly doubt she has any either. :D
 

STR8UP

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Originally posted by Bonhomme
Agreed, STR8UP.

The main thing I did right in that thoroughly enjoyable situation was to keep my expectations in line with the reality and simply live in the moment. And what fine moments they were. No regrets whatsoever, and I highly doubt she has any either. :D
As long as you (the older, wiser one) can manage to keep things in check, I don't see a problem with younger women. The problem is, it's a neverending chore to have to keep things from getting out of hand.

I can't tell you how many times I had to explain the reality of the situation to my last g/f, SO I COULD AVOID IT ALL COMING BACK ON ME LATER, just to have her STILL blame me when something went wrong. I tell ya, chicks only hear what they want to hear.
 

Heretolearn

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HEY,

what do you mean a hassle and effort keeping the eperson in check?



What about just being friends with the person instead?

* Feel lame saying that after we (men) hate the reverse happening.

I just want to meet new interesting people right now and most of all LAUGH!

Then focus on me as man it is quite time consuming to get your life in order :)
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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STR8UP

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Originally posted by yendor28
HEY,

what do you mean a hassle and effort keeping the eperson in check?
A younger chick is almost ALWAYS disillusioned as to how relationships really work and things of the sort. YOU being older will have more experience and be able to see things that your girl can't see. I've said it many times before......even if she is mature for her age (mine was VERY mature) it is no substitute for experience. Young women require a lot of hand holding and sometimes it just isn't worth the frustration.

What about just being friends with the person instead?

* Feel lame saying that after we (men) hate the reverse happening.

I just want to meet new interesting people right now and most of all LAUGH!

Then focus on me as man it is quite time consuming to get your life in order :)
Most of the women I hang out with are in their early to mid 20's. Nothing wrong with that at all! As a matter of fact, if all you are looking to do is have fun, I would befriend every one you meet.

Dude, I go out a couple of times a week and have a BLAST! I laugh my ass off. I slap chicks asses. I take pictures of girl-on-girl makeout sessions. It's great!

I don't even know a whole lot about the girls I hang with. They are out to have fun.....not get into deep philosophical discussions about the origins of the universe. Take it for what it is and enjoy it. One day you WILL be getting too old for it.

I thought you were speaking specifically about having a relationship. I doubt I could relate much to a girl who can't even legally drink alcohol, but hey, if you wanna have a good time hanging out, the 21-25 yr old women are the way to go.
 

KarmaSutra

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Re: Re: Depends what you want and who she is

Originally posted by STR8UP
That's the biggest problem with the relationship minded chicks on this age group. They still buy the 'knight in shining armour' schtick hook, line, and sinker. It feels GREAT to be fawned over by a youngin' with nice little perkies, but the reality is that even if they are mature in other aspects it doesn't mean that they have a realistic view on relationships.

Girls live under the fallen tree, Snow White reality of the dashing paramour who'll come and gently kiss away thier boredom and deliver them from evil, amen.


You can potty train a puppy, but unfortunately with a younger girl it is going to take her having SEVERAL owners try to break her in before she stops making messes on the carpet.
Remember what Pavlov was able to do with his dogs and Milton Erickson with humans. Anything learned can be un-learned and then retrained.
 
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