"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Age difference is key to having most kids: study

AlphaSoldier

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Age difference is key to having most kids: study

By Michael Kahn Tue Aug 28, 9:16 PM ET

LONDON (Reuters) - To have the most children, men should find a partner six years younger and women a mate four years older, Austrian researchers said on Wednesday.
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The researchers tried to use evolution to explain why men often prefer younger women and what typically drives women's desire for older men, said their leader, Vienna University anthropologist Martin Fieder.

While it is no surprise to hear that men pick younger women to bolster their reproductive fitness and that women choose older partners for security, the study is the first to quantify the age difference that results in the most children, he said.

"Nobody has shown before this has consequences for the number of offspring," Fieder said in a telephone interview. "We have shown for the first time this is the case."

The researchers wanted to find the most beneficial ages for both men and women to have the most offspring, so looked at the data with that in mind and came out with different numbers for each.

Writing in the Royal Society's Biology Letters on Wednesday, the researchers said they collected information from Swedish national registries to track the number of births and age of parents going back 55 years.

The researchers looked at men and women who did not change their partners between the birth of their first and last child and found the age differences among couples that produced the most offspring.

For both men and women, having a partner of the optimal age meant having an average of 2.2 children compared with 2.1 children when they picked partners of the same age -- a significant number in evolutionary terms that accumulates over time, Fieder said.

The findings are the result of a statistical analysis and do not mean that every man can find a woman six years younger and that every women would find a man four years older.

"It was a very systemic pattern," Fieder said. "We don't think it is random."

The study of couples during their typical child-bearing years also showed that both men and women who changed partners usually chose a person younger than the one they had before for their second one, Fieder said.

The finding regarding men was expected but that women also traded in for a younger partner was surprising, said Fieder. He suggested that because women are older when finding a second partner, they look for a younger, more fertile man.

"This holds true both for men and women: men shift to a much younger partner; women shift to a partner less old than the first," the researchers wrote.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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bigjohnson

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My rule of thumb has been 10 years - add ten to her age and the difference between that and your age is the number to think about - obviously I was a bit older by the time I figured this out - it's not recommended for 18 year old guys .....

But then this is more for judging LTR material and guys under 30 shouldn't be considering an LTR IMO.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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bigjohnson said:
My rule of thumb has been 10 years - add ten to her age and the difference between that and your age is the number to think about - obviously I was a bit older by the time I figured this out - it's not recommended for 18 year old guys .....

But then this is more for judging LTR material and guys under 30 shouldn't be considering an LTR IMO.
So how many kids did that net you?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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