"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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After sex, when to text or call?

spinaroonie

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You've been on three great dates and had sex on the third date. You left his apartment afterwards and didn't spend the night.

Do you guys contact a girl the day after the first bang if you intend to hit it again? There are definitely different schools on this, and I'm curious what you guys--especially the more experienced among you--do and, of course, what your rationale is behind it.

I've generally subscribed to the I-can-now-show-a-little-bit-softness school and send a quick, silly, or light-teasing text the next day related to something we did or talked about the previous night. The rationale is that it will evaporate any creeping awkwardness in her head and secure her for future escapades.

The other side of that coin is that it's better to keep her wondering for a day or two and then drop a line for maximum effect. Contacting her so immediately conveys, at best, a relationshipy vibe or, worse, a needy, beta

Thoughts?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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killerdiller

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Interesting question. If the two of you did not part with plans for a future date, I don't think there's anything wrong with getting in touch with her (or him) and thanking them for the hospitality, although maybe not using that exact language.

Otherwise, I've found that being frank right up front - i.e. "I'd like to see you again. Let's reconcile our schedules and figure out when we can meet again." - makes next-day communication unnecessary. By this point, you've made your intentions clear, and if she's a mature adult, that should be good enough, assuming that she likes you and is interested again. In this manner, you've made your interest clear, but the lack of communication in the interim leaves her headily wondering, "OMG, I hope he likes me."

Obviously, the aforementioned scenarios assume mutual interest.

Edit: You used the phrase "his apartment," but this applies to wondering females as well.
 
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