Advice please.

[Zunder]

So I am maybe meeting up with this woman at my local pub today, but I said I wasn't sure I could make it as i might be going sailing today....but told if the sailing is cancelled then I will go (she is a semi regular at the pub, and is an 8.5 on the looks scale).

Well, the sailing has been canclled.

Do i text and say that it was cancelled and say "see you there at the pub"?
Or do I just turn up without any text, and if she is there then that might indicate a reasonable high IL on her part?

 

[Andy_Dufresne]

Call her and ask her to join you at a given time.

Don't text, its lame. You have her phone number, use it.

 

[Romjuan]

in this situation it probably doesnt matter either way. i would just go to the bar and have fun and not worry about whether she is there or not. if you are leaning towards texting her then keep it short just saying something like boating got canceled ill be heading to the pub. then just assume you will not get a response back...honestly either way it shouldnt matter though. doesnt seem like a situation where something bad would happen

 

[jophil28]

So I am maybe meeting up with this woman at my local pub today, but I said I wasn't sure I could make it as i might be going sailing today....but told if the sailing is cancelled then I will go (she is a semi regular at the pub, and is an 8.5 on the looks scale).

Hey Zunder..how's things in the Shaky Isles ?

OK back to your question.

Telling a new prospect that you 'might' show up if your other activity is canceled can work against you. Women have massive egos and they expect to be automatically promoted to the top of the ladder in your thoughts after a ten minute convo over one drink.
When she heard that you will turn up at the pub ONLY if your sailing is called off, she thinks, " He is treating me already as his second choice, I expect to be #1. "
Every time in the past when I have been in your position I noticed that she NEVER showed up.
They also protect their egos even further ....They will never put themselves in a position of turning up and waiting for you in case you do not show up. Remember that she has NO investment in you at this stage .

Women will often flake on arrangements with men , cancel dates at the last moment, make all manner of excuses, but they fiercely protect themselves from the ego hit of these things ever happening to them.

THis is what I would do in your situation. Tell her that you are going sailing, no if's or but's, then get her email, and her digits, with a little C&F and then leave.
Contact her two days later and set up another meet. IF she has given you her # then she has at least moderate IL.

General tips - Never wait for a new woman at the bar. Never expect that a LOOSE arrangement with her will come true, and always control the thread of connection.

 

[Zunder]

Well I did text her, but she said she had a "headache"!

Women and flakines - bad fricken disease.

Next.

 

[cedd]

the best would have been to go sailling and meet up with her on a different time/day.
Even though it's been canceled.
As jophil said, women used to think they are spare wheels in such cases.
So to maximize your chance she wont flake, dont tell her "if i cant do that we can meet up", even its true. Say "Im doing [things] that day, what about this day ?"
And always have options. If the sailling is cancelled, call another cheek and plan a date for the evening. if she has pretty high interest level and is free, it can save your day. ;-)

its just a question of how you communicate.

cheers