"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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advice on throwaway situation, just for fun

realsmoothie

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I will preface this one by saying that I'm not a full-blown AFC, and do have a few things on the go at the moment. I'm just throwing this one out there as a test for you guys who might be bored.

I'm 31, and work in a high-volume public service kind of place. This new girl just started working for us, just moved into our city. 22, long brown hair, great body with some of the best natural breasts I've ever seen. She's quite shy, and I think she was raised pretty conservatively (though she is clearly not so much now, as per her green-smoking habit). She never says anything mean about anyone, never talks dirty, and isn't very good at sarcasm.

Bad part: she has a boyfriend. Some goof that she brought with her from home city, but doesn't live with her. Nice guy, but not even close to her league.

My question for you experts: what would you do here? I'm not looking to get in a relationship, and I'm not looking to bust up her relationship. I'd just like to get, uh, AT her. She is a sweetie, so I wouldn't mind a longer thing, but that's not the point.

I guess I'm looking for a kind of long-term strategy that might be fun at work, maybe a c&f angle (as you might put it) just to pique her interest.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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KarmaSutra

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The angle you'd want to work here is the age angle. Remind her in a not-so-innocent way that with age comes vast amounts of experience. You'll have some work to do but slyly remind her that her bore-friend is seriously lacking in the maturity department and you're the right man for the job.

Fvck the c&f, deangelo bullsh!t and get some confidence in your body language and voice tone. Also seriously work on sustaining eye contact and a sly smile.

Make her moist at the sight of you.

If you don't I will.:rock:
 

realsmoothie

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Heh, no way I'm telling YOU where she is... :D

But that's perfect advice. I never really thought of that, though I have definitely used that angle with other women.

The question is... how do you slip something like "my last girlfriend came like a waterfall" into a casual work conversation? LOL

I guess I'll have to make sure to parade any other women I'm with into the store.
 

KarmaSutra

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Social proof is extremely important and the indicator that you're a high status guy. Be the best you can be to all women in and out of her presence. What she sees an hears through the grapevine will solidify her attraction to you.

Where do you work again? The DMV?:crackup:
 

realsmoothie

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LOL no, not the DMV. A funky video store/coffee shop downtown (and at least I'm a manager, so we're not talking TOTAL peanuts for money).

This social proof thing is absolutely amazing me the more I learn about it.

It matters less what you look like, how you dress, what kind of job you have, the size of your wang, the car you drive, etc... than how a particular woman perceives OTHER women want you.

Funny, I was reading about the French psychoanalyst Jacques Lacan the other day, and his concept of desire. One's desire is another's desire. Bob wants a Jaguar, Jim sees Bob wanting a Jaguar, so Jim gets one too.

I was hanging out with this very sexily-dressed HB yesterday in town and bumped into an ex-girlfriend. Now, this ex-girlfriend always liked me, but never had a level of DESIRE for me like she did when she saw me with this HB. Her eyes were like full-on "BOIIIINNNG".

Any good threads on social proof here? I think I'm going to be spending a lot more time with this HB (both in and out of bed) and would like to know how to get the most out of it. She is not long-term material.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Natch

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Am I the only one that thinks if she's happy , go out and find some single gal thats *looking* for some sausage.

Are you that mad for the clam that youre willing to bust up their relationship for it?

*gets down off high horse*.

If theyre not happy or he's bad for her , go for it, I'm just sayin is all.
 

realsmoothie

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Natch said:
Am I the only one that thinks if she's happy , go out and find some single gal thats *looking* for some sausage.

Are you that mad for the clam that youre willing to bust up their relationship for it?

*gets down off high horse*.

If theyre not happy or he's bad for her , go for it, I'm just sayin is all.
LOL "mad for the clam"... ALWAYS, man!

Well, you're right in a way. But: he is a loser, and doesn't deserve her. AND... I have to work with her anyhow, so it's not like I'm going out of my way. It's really more of a game on my part.

Come on, a guy can have his fun, can't he?
 

Natch

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realsmoothie said:
LOL "mad for the clam"... ALWAYS, man!

Well, you're right in a way. But: he is a loser, and doesn't deserve her. AND... I have to work with her anyhow, so it's not like I'm going out of my way. It's really more of a game on my part.

Come on, a guy can have his fun, can't he?
Hmmmmm my pappy always tole me "Don't shoot at em iffen yer ain't gonna eat em".

But I have been in your situation and played it for fun exactly as you are :D
 

realsmoothie

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Heh... thing is, if I ever "shoot" her, she won't be dead, she'll be more alive than ever...:woo:

Minor update: I was talking to said girl at work last night and a cute customer came up to talk to me... and co-worker girl stepped right into the conversation, which is TOTALLY unlike her. She even "kino'ed" me with an "oh, you" smack to the shoulder.

Social proof... got to love it.
 

Latinoman

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But: he is a loser, and doesn't deserve her.
You are probably under estimating the man based on what he wanted YOU and others (at her job) to see.

Or maybe he is a loser.

We don't know that.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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realsmoothie

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Heh, saw that. Good call.

But those quotes... while warning signs, aren't sure things. Obviously non-AFC's have to use them sometimes, or else every DJ out there would have to admit that no girl is fvcked up, and every boyfriend out there is class A material.

Just pointing that out because when I say "he's a loser" in this case, it's to justify hitting on the girl.

He just got there first. Now all she does is complain about him... no "focus", just sits at home all the time on the computer. Early on, I would egg that on, but now I just smile and nod and change the topic.
 
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