Advice on Situation with my First plate since Break Up

[jackson37]

I've been out of the game for 2 years cause of my ex and after almost 2 months of grieving/getting over her finally starting back in it again and need some advice please!

New girl was friends with me when ex and I were dating, her crew and mine met at a bar, she asked about my ex cause she didn't know the news yet, told her about the breakup, later that night we dance for a while, hook up and I number close as she leaves.

We text later that night, she tells me how she always thought I was cute, I say the same, more texting throughout the next day...suppose to be going to the same party the next night but she never shows. I didn't text her and she hasn't texted me since before the party. Should I send a text making a joke/with a purpose? Should I wait to see how this plays out? Is it over? I don't think I did anything wrong to **** this up haha but then again I don't know her personality that well yet

 

[jackson37]

What do you mean by "hook up".

To me that means you banged her.

Just making out while dancing

 

[cordoncordon]

First, we all know how hard getting over a ltr can be, so congrats for getting back out there.

As far as this new girl? I would just call her on Tuesday or Wed and ask her out for a day next weekend. Or maybe you could arrange a superbowl meetup with you, her, and all of your friends? The point is don't worry about her not showing up at the party or not hearing from her after. Just be free and easy, relaxed, and confident when talking to her and set something up.

 

[TheCWord]

Congrats on getting back on the horse after a long relationship, but you have a severe misunderstanding of what hooking up is.

 

[jackson37]

Haha I guess I'm still inexperienced so I misuse the word. I won't worry about it and if she hasn't contacted me by like mid week I'll probably make plans to go to or host a party with her invited and take it from there

Feels good to be back

 

[jackson37]

Could I just get one more piece of advice from someone? It's my first plate and I'd like to not mess this up cause it's helping with my recovery process.

Does my plan sound good?

 

[TheCWord]

Could I just get one more piece of advice from someone? It's my first plate and I'd like to not mess this up cause it's helping with my recovery process.

Does my plan sound good?

This is personally what I would do, I think it kind of jives with what you're thinking:

jackson: Hey (girl), did you make it out to (whoever's) party? I was there for a bit but didn't see you.
Girl: Hey, blah blah blah I couldn't make it cause whatever.
jackson: Cool. Well let's grab a drink soon. What nights work for you this week?

Ideally, the text convo should only last 2-3 more messages after that.

If it's a go (3 messages)

Girl: That'd be great! I'm free (this day) and (this day). OR That'd be great but this week's kind of crazy but (counter offer here re: next week)
jackson: Let's meet at (this place) on (this day) at (this time).
Girl: See you then

If it's a no-go (2 messages)

Girl: Ah this week's kind of crazy [no counter offer]
jackson: kk [never speak to her again]

 

[jackson37]

I think I'm just going to wait on it lol thanks for the advice guys

 

[GotED?]

Find other women to date - always be able to walk away from women who are not 100% interested in you.

Once you start chasing - the AFC fagg@t starts rolling in.

 

[jackson37]

Find other women to date - always be able to walk away from women who are not 100% interested in you.

Once you start chasing - the AFC fagg@t starts rolling in.

So if I take what you said into account then I shouldn't contact her unless she contacts me? I was thinking of inviting her to a party this weekend or asking what she was up to

 

[May_Day]

hook up and I number close as she leaves.

You didn't actually hook up with her. This is not even a plate

suppose to be going to the same party the next night but she never shows. I didn't text her and she hasn't texted me since before the party. Should I send a text making a joke/with a purpose? Should I wait to see how this plays out? Is it over? I don't think I did anything wrong to **** this up haha but then again I don't know her personality that well yet

Why would you want to joke when she didn't show at the party? If she actually likes you, she will text you. Don't keep calling girls all the tme when you don't hear from them.

 

[Krueg]

Well screw her! She stood you up, dont contact her. If she calls you back, tell her you met some other girl at the party and your not interested any more lol

 

[Poop1337]

I'd send her text inviting her for a drink.

 

[jackson37]

Lots of mixed reviews haha for those suggesting to invite her to drinks or a date I'm in college and people right now don't really do that I feel. Think I'm just gonna ignore and see if she chases. Maybe run into her at a party or not, I'll leave it up to fate and chase other girls.

 

[GotED?]

There is a purpose to each poster's reputation level - so you can weigh all the posted comments NOT equally so you can make an informed decision for yourself (we are just trying to share our point of view based on experience as DJ).

Be well

Exodus