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Advice on a Girls interest level that dropped

Romjuan

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Ive been a LONNNNNG time member. Had some ups and downs in different relationships. Here I am back again needing some advice.

Been dating this girl off and on 2+ years. Weve both had other relationships during that span but somehow always got back together dating. Year ago she moved to a different State, we still did date but not exclusive. Shes always been the one wanting a relationship with me, I was always hesitant because 1. she has kids and 2. different core values.

Past 6 months her interest level was sky high. Phone sex, missing me texts, etc. Ever since 3 weeks ago, something changed. Its like night and day. Her texts are a lot less. She has this bitchy tone on the text. No more "i love you" or "i miss you texts". Ive been trying to set up dates to come see her, she keeps saying shes busy with work, which she is. Interest level is signifanctly and noticeably lower all in a matter of 3-4 weeks. I even messaged her today saying Im thinking of moving there early next year, she responds with " Things seem to have gotten a bit difficult between us... Not sure it's a good idea to move anything to a next level with the way it is already."

Looking back, I see a couple things that could have changed it.
1. Weve been arguing a lot about opinions with religion and politics which she brings up. Shes very judgemental if I dont agree with her opinions.
2. There maybe another guy, which would be extremely hard with her work and kid situation.
3. When I noticed her interest level drop, mine sky rocketed through the roof and Ive been extremly, noticeably needy towards her, thus dropping hers to me.

It could also be a combination of all 3 now that I think about it. But it just sucks how 4 weeks ago she would have done anything for me, now she doesnt even care or want me to come see her.

If one of you would post, my advice given this situation would be:
Do 2 weeks no contact, pull back and let her pursue you. Keep busy dating, hobbies and build yourself.
The problem is even though shes pulled back, she will still text. So I cant do no contact because she will text me dailey still. I can be distant and short to her with my replies, but that may show im bitter. Wondering what you all would suggest to raise interest level?
 

mrgoodstuff

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This why I don't like texting. She can check if your still on the hook in 2 seconds. No real investment from her. Ignore her texts let her call you. Tell her you been super busy chasing some life goals and text too much of a distraction. Plan the next date or hookup.
 

Romjuan

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This why I don't like texting. She can check if your still on the hook in 2 seconds. No real investment from her. Ignore her texts let her call you. Tell her you been super busy chasing some life goals and text too much of a distraction. Plan the next date or hookup.
Id normally agree, but shes a single mother and working two jobs. She really doesnt have enough time to talk on phone for duration. Texting is usually the way we communicate during downtime.
 

daddymonsterpoodle

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Change your number.. Or block hers. No-one needs low interest AND bitchiness. I would guess she is seeing someone else or thinking about it. The whole situation is retarded. Meet someone in your own town which you obviously have the skills to do.
 

Arcturus

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Keep as your play thing on the side, but yeah it looks like she is talking to someone else. She probably wants to meet a guy who is daddy material for the kids and interested in a relationship. This isn't unfair and you shouldn't fault her for it, heck I'd even be happy for the girl in this situation and want what is best for her and the kids as well. Don't go no contact, that would be too awkward, go very low contact. Suddenly be busy and avoid her as much as possible or keep the texts short. When you do text her, be funny, witty, charming, seductive, exciting. Leave her wanting more but don't give it to her. You pulling back for two weeks, should do the trick. Then you slowly let her earn your interest back by her making a lot of effort and thus investing. If she still hasn't come around after two weeks, you need to cut her off.

Take the time off to meet new women, you seem a bit too emotionally invested in her and reactive.
 

Romjuan

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Just as I knew, shes texing me today. Asks what im doing. I was Busy so she kept texting like, what are you doing why are you not responding.

I told her i was busy and call me later if she wants to talk. She got bitchy again like "why cant you text. This is what i get for chit chatting with you."
I made a joke about how i see redflags on her. She got bitchy and blew up.

I said just calm down we can talk tomorrow.
She came back with
"I'm fine. Don't know what you're talking about. I asked what your up to n what errands your doing and u tell me if I want to talk I need to call you so I asked why and you come back with my "red flags" ..... If you can see where I'm coming from on how you're making it difficult again. It's cool tho. You could've just said u didn't wanna talk or ignored my texts instead of bein a ****. "..."Anyways like I said I'm fine, been a great day, so no need to talk tomorrow either ..... It's been a never ending circle lately with you. "

Im so confused. This morning im telling her how id move down tobe closer to her and shes the one that says "no dont do it. Things are different with us where its not a good idea for us to move to a next level. Things are just different with us."

Not sure what to do now or say to her
 

mrgoodstuff

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Just as I knew, shes texing me today. Asks what im doing. I was Busy so she kept texting like, what are you doing why are you not responding.

I told her i was busy and call me later if she wants to talk. She got bitchy again like "why cant you text. This is what i get for chit chatting with you."
I made a joke about how i see redflags on her. She got bitchy and blew up.

I said just calm down we can talk tomorrow.
She came back with
"I'm fine. Don't know what you're talking about. I asked what your up to n what errands your doing and u tell me if I want to talk I need to call you so I asked why and you come back with my "red flags" ..... If you can see where I'm coming from on how you're making it difficult again. It's cool tho. You could've just said u didn't wanna talk or ignored my texts instead of bein a ****. "..."Anyways like I said I'm fine, been a great day, so no need to talk tomorrow either ..... It's been a never ending circle lately with you. "

Im so confused. This morning im telling her how id move down tobe closer to her and shes the one that says "no dont do it. Things are different with us where its not a good idea for us to move to a next level. Things are just different with us."

Not sure what to do now or say to her
See how her text is the LAZY way to maintain you. Let that b1tch call if she wants to talk. But no free and easy texting attention!
 

nismo-4

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It's likely your princess is in another castle, and she's trying to peg you as an orbiter or beta provider. Do you have a replacement lined up?

I'd just move her to the backburner, ignore her texts, minimally respond to just one if you get more than one from her. But no longer initiate. The court grants you Nolle Prosequi. It means do not follow. Not even on Twitter.

I'll leave this case open. It needs more reviews and results from the OP.
 

Desdinova

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When she moved, she tied the relationship to the back of the car and drove away. The relationship is dead and you're trying to bring it back to life.

You could've just said u didn't wanna talk or ignored my texts instead of bein a ****. "..."Anyways like I said I'm fine, been a great day, so no need to talk tomorrow either ..... It's been a never ending circle lately with you. "
WHY ARE YOU KEEPING THIS GOING? WHY? WHY? WHY?

You aren't getting laid. You aren't getting invited to get laid. She doesn't even live near you. All you have are words on a screen and a d1ck in your hand.

Quit communicating with her and find yourself a local woman who can give you positive physical attention.
 

Romjuan

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Ha. Well doesnt look like anymore communication. She defriended me on FB and even had her family members defriend me. Kind of childesh and not even sure what I did. I sent her text today with something funny that happend, she didnt even respond. My guess is she wasnt seeing a future with us so shes trying to cut off communication to end things easier.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Ha. Well doesnt look like anymore communication. She defriended me on FB and even had her family members defriend me. Kind of childesh and not even sure what I did. I sent her text today with something funny that happend, she didnt even respond. My guess is she wasnt seeing a future with us so shes trying to cut off communication to end things easier.
Find some new puzzy. Find 2 or 3 of them closer to you. Don't worry about her, keep it moving.
 

Glassguy

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^^^^^^^^^THIS^^^^^^^^^^^

Become busy with other girls and be scarce. Do not under any circumstances initiate any contact with her.

Too many good chicks out there for your entertainment to be screwing with one that is unsure. Unsure now equals disaster later.
 

dude99

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Ive been a LONNNNNG time member. Had some ups and downs in different relationships. Here I am back again needing some advice.

Been dating this girl off and on 2+ years. Weve both had other relationships during that span but somehow always got back together dating. Year ago she moved to a different State, we still did date but not exclusive. Shes always been the one wanting a relationship with me, I was always hesitant because 1. she has kids and 2. different core values.

Past 6 months her interest level was sky high. Phone sex, missing me texts, etc. Ever since 3 weeks ago, something changed. Its like night and day. Her texts are a lot less. She has this bitchy tone on the text. No more "i love you" or "i miss you texts". Ive been trying to set up dates to come see her, she keeps saying shes busy with work, which she is. Interest level is signifanctly and noticeably lower all in a matter of 3-4 weeks. I even messaged her today saying Im thinking of moving there early next year, she responds with " Things seem to have gotten a bit difficult between us... Not sure it's a good idea to move anything to a next level with the way it is already."

Looking back, I see a couple things that could have changed it.
1. Weve been arguing a lot about opinions with religion and politics which she brings up. Shes very judgemental if I dont agree with her opinions.
2. There maybe another guy, which would be extremely hard with her work and kid situation.
3. When I noticed her interest level drop, mine sky rocketed through the roof and Ive been extremly, noticeably needy towards her, thus dropping hers to me.

It could also be a combination of all 3 now that I think about it. But it just sucks how 4 weeks ago she would have done anything for me, now she doesnt even care or want me to come see her.

If one of you would post, my advice given this situation would be:
Do 2 weeks no contact, pull back and let her pursue you. Keep busy dating, hobbies and build yourself.
The problem is even though shes pulled back, she will still text. So I cant do no contact because she will text me dailey still. I can be distant and short to her with my replies, but that may show im bitter. Wondering what you all would suggest to raise interest level?
The fact that your relationship has already ended and restarted a number of times tells me you are her plan b and she expects you to be ready and waiting any time she wants and not under foot when she wants to go have sex with other guys. Aka she is a low quality woman.

It is most likely number 2

When new attention starts to creep in chicks tend to get bitchy towards the guy they were already dating. In her women language she admitted this when she said "things havent been going that great between us....." speach she gave you. What she was saying is " if you move here it will be awfully awkward for me to see other guys with you living here."

Withdraw all your attention. Go no contact.

Don't put yourself through a long emotional drawn break up. Just walk away and next her.
 

dude99

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Just as I knew, shes texing me today. Asks what im doing. I was Busy so she kept texting like, what are you doing why are you not responding.

I told her i was busy and call me later if she wants to talk. She got bitchy again like "why cant you text. This is what i get for chit chatting with you."
I made a joke about how i see redflags on her. She got bitchy and blew up.

I said just calm down we can talk tomorrow.
She came back with
"I'm fine. Don't know what you're talking about. I asked what your up to n what errands your doing and u tell me if I want to talk I need to call you so I asked why and you come back with my "red flags" ..... If you can see where I'm coming from on how you're making it difficult again. It's cool tho. You could've just said u didn't wanna talk or ignored my texts instead of bein a ****. "..."Anyways like I said I'm fine, been a great day, so no need to talk tomorrow either ..... It's been a never ending circle lately with you. "

Im so confused. This morning im telling her how id move down tobe closer to her and shes the one that says "no dont do it. Things are different with us where its not a good idea for us to move to a next level. Things are just different with us."

Not sure what to do now or say to her
Notice how she is blowing up and being confusing? She is looking to dump you and move on to the next guy and wants to make it all your fault.

Just next this one.
 

muzza.deman

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You could cut her off for say 5 days.... Then see how......
YOU feel ...Clarity is needed. This relationship seems a little tit for tat..phaps there is another dude !!!!! but what do you care....is she truly LTR worthy.?.She knows how to push your buttons and takes full advantage as long as you play ball .
 

sodbuster

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quit being a necro romancer, it's dead. quit trying to bring it back. It should have been dead once you figured out you have different values...... yet here you are. It's dead and long distance.....
 
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