Hello,
Long story you could skip to the parts below the capital headers. Pre-caution much beta.
So Ive met a girl at the pool 1.5 yr ago. She had a b/f back then and I wasnt focused on girls around then. I was both physically and mentally attracted tho.
She started contacting me 1-2 months ago but I flaked her. A month ago we got into contact again. That week when I was out in town and I knew she was as well I spontaneously texted her (we were chatting that morning) that I could join her to her gym for a session. So I did, had short talk etc went to the gym it was all good. We went for lunch after and after having eaten we went out for a long walk which I had to end, seemed she wouldnt any time soon and I felt it was time to go home. We decided to meet again the same night for a movie at her place(she lives alone).
Writing this makes me realize how many opportunities and failures Ive made already, what a waste yet a big learning experience. But to resume..
The movie at her place went good lying against eachother on the couch etc occasional deep stare in my eyes with a smile from her. I leave on good terms but didnt take action. (Fail #1)
Second date a day or two after, same thing basicly, she lit a scent stick prior to my arrival, we watched another movie and had some deeper conversation. She was very touchy very. Again I took no action, shy, nervous inside idk. (Fail #2)
She kept contact next date at her place again, I decided I felt feelings for her and was suffering oneitis. At the end of the date I said I had to get something off my chest(3 AM by now). I went beta, told her I was starting to really like her and this is rare for me. I noticed her ego boost a tenfold. She started th blabla so many guys want me, I dont want to hurt them. After her rant I asked so what about me and let her know im cool with any outcome I just wanted to not let the opportunity pass. She said she wanted to think about it. And asked what kind of relationship I was looking for and how long mine have lasted in the past.
When I was leaving I hugged her twice and she held me very tight like squeezing me. I followed it up with a kiss and some tongue. She had this seducted look in her eyes and wouldnt let go off my waist. (5am now btw) Said she was tired and I agreed time to go. She let me know she was expecting to hear from me.
(Epic fail #3)
One more date a few days later nothing to mention, casual, had fun not much happened. She did dress nice though. I didnt ask about the earlier stuff anymore. I would hear if so is what I figured. Only hugged her at my departure as I felt she wouldnt kiss probably. She dropped her hands off my back instead of holding onto me which was a clear sign. (Fail #4 maybe)
I went NC and a week later I walk into her at her gym. I casually said hi and went to do my thing. She came to me for short talk. I took her out to eat some chinese after. I was acting cool, indifferent and reading this forum just now, its crazy how much this works its almost stupid. She asked me after why she hadnt heard much of me I said I was busy etc. She told me to contact her more often. So I did and we arranged another date(last weekend).
The last date (last Friday) she was very touchy more so than ever. I alpha'd up a little and got touchy too stroking her legs grabbing her ass and so on. At the end of the night for the first time while I was packing to leave she was laying on her bed. We played a little pushing game or something, then she said I shouldd get my bike she was tired. I said sure on one condition, trying to get her up from bed. She refuses to get up and keeps asking why what for? I tell her a kiss and at this point get told by her that she views me as just a friend. I told her no hard feelings, that life goes on kept my head up smiled and I left.
(Fail #5, should have kissed her earlier in the date i think when i was holding her etc)
PART I NEED ADVICE :
The day after she s texting me early afternoon and she texts first( first time she does since my beta ilikeu confession fail two week ago)
Saying Hey how are you. I replied Hey fine how was your trial day at work. Long reply from her in that. I reply in a short matte after. Few hours pass and she texts me I can drop by tonigh if I like to. I told her I was going out that night, said nothing else played it cool. She insta replies(rare for her since my beta ilikeu) "Oh". I didnt reply, twenty mins later she writes "Have fun". I didnt reply again.
The next morning(yesterday) I wrote her "Sorry, I didnt see your message". To which she replied in the same hour "Oh no problem its okay" roughly translated. I dont reply to it. That evening she texted me if Im doing anything tonight? I ignored it unsure what to do and I dont know if im hopeful thinking, but probably am.
HERE WE ARE, OPTIONS I CONSIDER:
1. Go NC on her this week keepignoring.
2. Spice it up. Text her I was out yday to the movies or something with someone I met last saturday. To raise her interest. Then proceed into no contact from my side only responding in a short cool matter when she contacts me.
Im keen on option two, share your thoughts and please be real about it. In any case I learned a lot from the experiences with this girl.
I know I'm very beta by nature. But this always worked out fine for me. It just seems to be there's a smaller % of girls into beta guys than there are guys into alphas. Good thing I stumbled across this forum for a mindset change.
Long story you could skip to the parts below the capital headers. Pre-caution much beta.
So Ive met a girl at the pool 1.5 yr ago. She had a b/f back then and I wasnt focused on girls around then. I was both physically and mentally attracted tho.
She started contacting me 1-2 months ago but I flaked her. A month ago we got into contact again. That week when I was out in town and I knew she was as well I spontaneously texted her (we were chatting that morning) that I could join her to her gym for a session. So I did, had short talk etc went to the gym it was all good. We went for lunch after and after having eaten we went out for a long walk which I had to end, seemed she wouldnt any time soon and I felt it was time to go home. We decided to meet again the same night for a movie at her place(she lives alone).
Writing this makes me realize how many opportunities and failures Ive made already, what a waste yet a big learning experience. But to resume..
The movie at her place went good lying against eachother on the couch etc occasional deep stare in my eyes with a smile from her. I leave on good terms but didnt take action. (Fail #1)
Second date a day or two after, same thing basicly, she lit a scent stick prior to my arrival, we watched another movie and had some deeper conversation. She was very touchy very. Again I took no action, shy, nervous inside idk. (Fail #2)
She kept contact next date at her place again, I decided I felt feelings for her and was suffering oneitis. At the end of the date I said I had to get something off my chest(3 AM by now). I went beta, told her I was starting to really like her and this is rare for me. I noticed her ego boost a tenfold. She started th blabla so many guys want me, I dont want to hurt them. After her rant I asked so what about me and let her know im cool with any outcome I just wanted to not let the opportunity pass. She said she wanted to think about it. And asked what kind of relationship I was looking for and how long mine have lasted in the past.
When I was leaving I hugged her twice and she held me very tight like squeezing me. I followed it up with a kiss and some tongue. She had this seducted look in her eyes and wouldnt let go off my waist. (5am now btw) Said she was tired and I agreed time to go. She let me know she was expecting to hear from me.
(Epic fail #3)
One more date a few days later nothing to mention, casual, had fun not much happened. She did dress nice though. I didnt ask about the earlier stuff anymore. I would hear if so is what I figured. Only hugged her at my departure as I felt she wouldnt kiss probably. She dropped her hands off my back instead of holding onto me which was a clear sign. (Fail #4 maybe)
I went NC and a week later I walk into her at her gym. I casually said hi and went to do my thing. She came to me for short talk. I took her out to eat some chinese after. I was acting cool, indifferent and reading this forum just now, its crazy how much this works its almost stupid. She asked me after why she hadnt heard much of me I said I was busy etc. She told me to contact her more often. So I did and we arranged another date(last weekend).
The last date (last Friday) she was very touchy more so than ever. I alpha'd up a little and got touchy too stroking her legs grabbing her ass and so on. At the end of the night for the first time while I was packing to leave she was laying on her bed. We played a little pushing game or something, then she said I shouldd get my bike she was tired. I said sure on one condition, trying to get her up from bed. She refuses to get up and keeps asking why what for? I tell her a kiss and at this point get told by her that she views me as just a friend. I told her no hard feelings, that life goes on kept my head up smiled and I left.
(Fail #5, should have kissed her earlier in the date i think when i was holding her etc)
PART I NEED ADVICE :
The day after she s texting me early afternoon and she texts first( first time she does since my beta ilikeu confession fail two week ago)
Saying Hey how are you. I replied Hey fine how was your trial day at work. Long reply from her in that. I reply in a short matte after. Few hours pass and she texts me I can drop by tonigh if I like to. I told her I was going out that night, said nothing else played it cool. She insta replies(rare for her since my beta ilikeu) "Oh". I didnt reply, twenty mins later she writes "Have fun". I didnt reply again.
The next morning(yesterday) I wrote her "Sorry, I didnt see your message". To which she replied in the same hour "Oh no problem its okay" roughly translated. I dont reply to it. That evening she texted me if Im doing anything tonight? I ignored it unsure what to do and I dont know if im hopeful thinking, but probably am.
HERE WE ARE, OPTIONS I CONSIDER:
1. Go NC on her this week keepignoring.
2. Spice it up. Text her I was out yday to the movies or something with someone I met last saturday. To raise her interest. Then proceed into no contact from my side only responding in a short cool matter when she contacts me.
Im keen on option two, share your thoughts and please be real about it. In any case I learned a lot from the experiences with this girl.
I know I'm very beta by nature. But this always worked out fine for me. It just seems to be there's a smaller % of girls into beta guys than there are guys into alphas. Good thing I stumbled across this forum for a mindset change.
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