Advice needed

[Toddz]

Situation is been dating this girl for 2 months she's 26 i'm 40. Things were great then went cold on her end in the last couple weeks. Not available, canceling plans, etc..

I know, there's obviously another dude in the picture. My question is should I just continue to be courteous and let her figure out who she wants to date or just go no contact and ghost her? She hasn't admitted to seeing someone else saying she's been sick. But I know what the deal is.

What would your play be here? Put her on the back burner and spin plates?

If she figures herself out that's fine, but I don't want to be wasting my time or energy in the meantime.

Thanks

 

[TheMonkeyKing]

Move on and see other girls, as you should be anyway. A lot of people have very low attention spans in this hyper-stimulus world we live in today. If you ignore her behaviour, dont make a fuss, and let her go, she'll almost certainly be back sooner rather than later. Neither of you owe the other anything after only two months.

When I date, I do so with at least 2-3 alternately, until such time as one proves them self worthy of more.

The mistake many men make is investing way too much, at least mentally, in someone they hardly know, way too soon. After 2 months, you think you know this girl, but in reality, you really don't. You've barely scratched the surface.

 

[ohrein]

You should always be spinning plates unless you're exclusive. You need to get to a place where you understand abundance. If you're still worried about this one woman, you're not ready to date one woman. Women aren't all that different and special. My girlfriend is great, she's a catch. But, there's plenty more great catches out there too. If we split, I'll be sad, I'll miss her, but I won't be some heart broken mess who is worried about never finding a good woman again. I know I can.

So, this girl isn't paying attention to you anymore, potentially has another guy. What does a guy who has an understanding of abundance do when a girl does that? What does a guy who knows he can attract a woman who will pay him attention and chase him do?

 

[Toddz]

You guys are both right. I used to spin plates and date 3-4 girls simultaneously on the regular. However I found it to be a lot of work and energy and almost all of them push for a relationship with me early on. At one point last fall, I dropped all the girls I was seeing and took a few months off from dating.

In this situation, I began dating her without any other solid options in the background. My mistake. Since she has pulled back and isn't available to see each other, i've hung out with 2 former plates and setting something up with a third for next weekend. I also have a fourth girl flying in early november.

I'm still wondering what this girls deal is though. Still says she wants to hang and hasn't met anyone else, wants to communicate on a daily basis. But yet have only seen her once in 3 weeks. Just go no contact and ghost on her and see if she hits me up again? We're supposed to get together today and I haven't heard from her in 2 days.

 

[Bible_Belt]

26 is about the age they start to think about marriage and settling down. She could have decided there was no potential of that in her relationship with you. It happens.