"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Advice needed!

Zakonax

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I am 29 years old, and met this smoking hot 21 year old who started working at my workplace in April. We hit it off really well, started hanging out together, and it fairly quickly became physical. The only snag is, she has a boyfriend. We were "together" for a few months, and it got pretty deep, we told each other "I love you", spoke about the future, etc, all the while I waited like an idiot for her to leave her boyfriend.

Invariably, she decided things were getting too difficult a few months ago and felt that she needed to try and work out things with him, and that she couldn't be around me. I took it a lot harder than i expected, which made me realize all the feelings that I had for her. However, I took some time, started getting over her, and we were basically no contact for the entire time. I've been dating again, have a couple of great prospects, and life was getting to be good again.

Until this weekend, when she decided to contact me out of the blue, tell me how much she misses me (i think she heard/realized that I was moving on and dating other people), etc, but her situation is still the same. I'm feeling pretty confused and torn up again, as I felt like I was over her and am now realizing that i'm not. I don't want to be "that guy" that hangs around forever, but I really do feel like if our situation worked out that we could have something incredible. I'm also aware of the fact that she might like just to keep me hanging on just in case things don't work out with her and the boyfriend.

Any advice? The thought of going no contact again really sucks, but I also don't want to put my entire life on hold and just wait on her.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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DJDamage

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If you go back with her, you are going to find yourself in the exact same spot again.

If you wish you can date her again but make sure you are dating other women. It is the allure of being a challenge and the fact that you have options that made her "miss you". When she had you, she decided to let you go in favour of her boyfriend because you stopped being challenging and he never stopped.

She is 21 years old, she is still a plaything, not worthy of LTR.
 

Warrior74

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21, pssh. Leave it. You don't have the stones to pump and dump so leave it before you get hurt by some young broad and then you'll be all mad and embarrassed because you got played by a baby. Having a grown man on a string is a massive ego boost for a chic. Walk away now.
 

L B

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Several things here:
1. Dating and the work place don't mix.
2. Getting too seriously with chick that has a boyfriend will not end well. Even pulling a hit and run on a chick with a bf is wrong.
3. You're always second choice to her. She wants you when she's having bf problems.
4. 21 year olds don't know what they want. If you are knowledgeable, you can string her along with no emotions attach and she won't know what hit her.
5. Bottom line is don't go back, ignore her or tell her it's over. No girl is worth the drama.
 

Desdinova

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NEVER become emotionally involved with a woman who already has a bf. The most you can do with a woman like this is use her as a FB while you pursue other women.

Speaking of which, get your ass out there and date other women. There are LOTS of women out there, and lots of them don't have a bf. There is absolutely NO REASON to remain attached to this one.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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iwanttofight

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Have you had sex with her yet? If your acting like this without even of had sex with her then there is something wrong with you, dont put her on a pedistool bro
 
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