Advice for kicking it with this work chick

[DonWon]

I started a thread a little while ago about this chick at the job that I was interested in. Most of the guys said to move on. Some said to go for it. I went for it. It worked...well so far. Here's what happened.

She emailed me and asked me if I was going to this local event, that I had no clue about. I was trying to make myself the game by responding that I wasn't going b/c I didn't even know about it. Boy was this the wrong time to do that. I was out of the office for two days, so I didn't get her email about it until the day before the event.

Long story short, I decided to ask her if she was going, and she said she wasn't because she didn't have a date. Boy did I feel dumb as hell. I had something to do that night, but I still felt bad. Anyway, we've chatted via the work's msgr that we have. We did this today. I busted her chops a bit, which was good. I talked to her about doing lunch, and she was receptive to that. We'd have to figure something out with our schedules. Anyway, I told her that we needed to do something to make up for us not being able to do anything last week. She was open to this, and said she looked forward to it. I usually like to plan things, but I want to make sure I incorporate something she likes to do. Should I ask her what she likes to do, or should I figure something for us to do? My primary concern is what would be a cool way to kick it, seeing as how it's the first time we'd be kicking it, and we don't want to put more into this event (stress included) then there needs to be...especially since this shouldn't be anything major anyway. I was thinking a second date might be dinner.

Looking for suggestions on how to get this one going...

 

[516]

Nah dude. You usually shouldnt have to worry about what she likes to do on a 1st date. Generally 1st date should be something basic like getting coffee/lunch/drinks and now that the weather is starting to get nice (depending on where you are located) maybe follow it up with a nice walk or something if its nice outside.

 

[PRMoon]

Everybody likes the Bar!...well at least I do. I'd say meet up with her after work for something quick and fun. Don't know where you live so I don't know what that'd entail. I'd usually go with "how bout we have a few drinks at (fill in your local bar here)" But again I like the bar! and that my not be your style.

 

[-HPNOTIQ-]

Get drinks...include a bit of alcohol. This will help open up her, and your, inhibitions.

Basically say:

"Hey..this has been a long work week...I NEED SOME ALCOHOL...come with me and lets blow off some steam..I know this great pool hall/bar with a great happy hour grill and good margaritas..."

keep it lax and chill...no need for another boring dinner and movie date...MAKE IT FUN...let her see the cool guy you are OUTSIDE OF WORK!

 

[DonWon]

Okay here's the update. I'm going to rush through to make this short.

I went over to see her one day that we were talking crap to each other. We only had a few minutes, but it was cool. I gave her my number and she's supposed to call me.

We chat casually via msgr at work which is cool.

Before the weekend sets in, I think I'm clear that we should do something basic. She's working this Saturday morning. I imagine we'll do an afternoon deal. We hadn't discussed if we'd kick it at night, or just keep it to an afternoon type of event.

Q1: How much time do I want to spend with her today?

Q2: I think I lost a little of my jitters by going over to see her. (That should be a good sign that I could go over there). I'm typically a great conversationalist with people I don't know. I think the fact that she is really fine which is f*cking with my head....not too much,but I don't like giving it a lot of thought. It just reeks of doubt, which I do not need. I want some additional thoughts on how to let her lead the convo and what we should be talking about

Q3: I don't want to get lost in a friend zone. She's got to know I'm digging her, and I do not want her to lose sight of that, and corner me into a phone chat buddy. How do I ensure that at the outset since we're in the "getting to know you" stages? If I got caught in the Friend Zone, I'd just as well walk away...no RUN!

 

[fatkins]

DON'T DO ANYTHING WITH SOMEONE YOU HAVE TO WORK WITH, TAKE IT FROM SOMEONE WHO KNOWS FROM PAST EXPERIENCE.

If you do it better be a one night thing and you both understand it was just that night if anything happens, but if you want a worthwhile relationship, well, they don't happen at the workplace.