Advice for frustrated virgins from an older dude.

[legolas]

Originally posted by malestrom

As it stands right now, it seems that the so-called "best PUA's" are actually only slightly motivated by genuine sexual desire. In fact, a vast majority of these men are motivated by raging personal insecurities, sexual hangups, deep feelings of inferiority and a sense of inadequacy. Some of them also display a degree of self-hatred. Combine all of this together and you have men with an almost compulsive need to prove something to themselves and the world by having sex with women. For many of them, this lifestyle is the lynchpin that holds their masculine identity and social-life together. Take women out of the picture and their concept of self is, at best, a blurry image. I suspect many of them are terrified they're not authentic men and have learned to put on a good show by constantly flaunting the notches in their bedpost.

Granted, I'm not saying this is true FOR ALL men who do well with women. But in my experiance, the men who've bagged over 100+ women almost always exude alot of self-loathing. They try to mask it with a kind of pseudo-confidence and vanity, but I've learned to see who's the real deal and who isn't.

All of this peacocking "jerk" bull$hit comes from this type of insecure thinking. And the "Alpha Male" garbage isn't too far behind it. Whenever I read about some guy "being a jerk" to a girl or whatever, I ask myself what he's doing with that kind of woman in the first place.

Malestrom,

I couldn't have said it any better than you. I've been doing the same kind of soul searcing, and have eventually landed in the same spot that you are in. These guys who are supposeldy PUAs (Pick-Up Artists) are dong it all to prove something to the world and maybe to themselves. I couldn't go asny deeper tahn you have since I haven't seen many of these guys, bt I do believe that they are chasing tails because they seek validation from the wrong sources. They are needy inside and hide it through techniques.

I aspire to be a man of class, humility and quiet confidence. I also aspire to be polite and respectful of my fellow man. The imposters will tell you this is AFC thinking, but the real question is: what does the imposter have to prove by purposely NOT being this way?

Those who have arrived at the place of TRUE success know that those running around "being a jerk" is a sure sign that an imposter is in the midst. Reason being that if a man has to TRY that hard, he doesn't possess what he desperately wants other to think he has gained.

Interestingly, the more that I am this way, the less trashy girls are attracted to me and the more high-quality, high-caliber women want to spend time with me.

Pook has beentalking about this for quite a while now. If you read some of his later posts, you'll see the same philosophy portrayed. It seems very weird ndeed but you always attract the kind ofperson that you yourself are. Manipulative guys always find themselves with b1tchy manipulative girls after them. These girls, hide their insecurities and their neediness behind sexy clothes, and flashy looks. I despise these girls wherever I see them, and have deep respect for the classy ones.

If you want to attract the kind of women that you really want, you have to build yourself into that kind of man. I'm not talking physical stuff here, although that is part of it too. If you want hotties that dress in flashy clothes and go clubbing every friday night, then that is the kind of man you have to build to attract this kind of woman. You have to work out, just like she does, color and spike your hair, dress into fancy clothes and learn how to dance. She'll fall immediately for you