Master Don Juan
- Apr 30, 2006
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I’m an attractive and intelligent woman in my mid-30s. To a certain extent, I know these things to be true. I’ve worked for 15 years as a successful commercial model, and I have a master’s degree and an above-average IQ. I’m in incredible shape. Also important to add: I definitely don’t come across as modest or sexually conservative. I post lingerie and bikini selfies.
I get a lot of emotional and intellectual fulfillment from my relationships with friends and family. When I date, my primary interest is finding partners who excite me physically and fulfill me sexually. For reasons I don’t understand, I rarely attract these men anymore. The men who flock to me, asking me out to the tune of several times a week (!), are average- or below-average-looking smart guys. These men have everything I’m looking for in a friend, but they aren’t what I want in a dating partner. My take is that they think my academic interests and penchant for elevated conversation will make me fall for them despite an obvious attractiveness gap. If I was looking for a marriage partner or someone to start a family with, that might be true. But I’m not! I want hot sex with semi-committed medium-term partners.
my opinion: HYPERGAMY, DISTILLED! THE WALL, DISTILLED!It sounds odd, but recently this non-stop attention from average-looking guys has started to eat away at my self-esteem. Instead of feeling flattered that they connect with me intellectually, I question whether interest from only this type of man means I’m not actually attractive. Again, they are great people! I just don’t want to have sex with them.
What can I do to attract the type of man I actually want to date? And how can I stop myself from feeling so insecure about the type of attention I’m getting in the meantime?