"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Adjusting your game after you've made improvements

muhnkee

Don Juan
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Hello guys. First time caller, long time listener.

Over the last two years, I've gone hard improving myself. I run regularly, lift weights and have gotten in better shape than I was in HS (I'm 35, BTW). I've improved my income, bought a vastly better wardrobe and focus on going out more.

In the last few months, something very strange has happened.

First off, women stopped hitting on me altogether. I used to get a decent amount of attention from chicks in the SMV 5-7 range. Heck, I even had a few buy me a drink.

Second, when I approach, I have to aim for the highest SMV chick around. If I'm not going for the very hottest chick, everyone seems to notice. The 5-7 range women now look at me like I am up to something. If I do get some play, every woman in the place starts giving her the evil eye.

Third, I seem to be having real trouble calibrating my escalation with these hotter women. I've spent a lot of effort on knocking out social game and comfort. Here's the thing . . . If I spend too much time developing comfort, the hot chick just loses interest. Anything more than 20 minutes before I start groping and grinding seems to be an utter disappointment to women now. On the other hand, if I just go in like a completely non-verbal ape, things go perfect.

Fourth, women have started doing some really aggressive **** toward me if I ignore them. I've had three different chicks in the last six months outright shove me. They didn't even try chatting me up. They just went right for a shove, completely unprovoked! I'm not talking a nudge. I'm talking a heavy shove that left a red mark on my chest. One chick I ignored made a point of driving past me and yelling at me that I could have "had this" after everyone was outside the bar. I've had several ask me if I was gay!

Finally, I've tried to recalibrate and escalate my game. And there seems to be no actual limit to what I can now get away with. An example . . . Satruday night I was leaving the club on foot. I was pretty drunk. And there was a chick ahead of me a block in a poorly lit area by herself. So, I decided to approach her. From behind. In the dark. Quickly. She's a high 7. Here's the thing . . . I laughed it off and apologized to her AND IT WORKED. We start getting all touchy until we get to a convenience store where there was a cop brutally eyeballing me for what I was doing. I broke it off. But . . . holy ****! There's no way that should ever work! (Yes, I am aware it was a terrible idea that I should not try again.)

As best I can tell, at this point, the only mistake I can make is not escalating rapidly! What the hell? I feel like I've somehow crossed some attractiveness threshold where women expect me to behave like the greatest alpha male that ever lived.

It's very weird, because I've always felt like I've needed to tighten down my social game. I'm a terrible, distant, difficult person. I also had a lot of trouble when I was learning early on with comfort building. A lot of times, I'd jump the gun on escalation and get blown out. So, I have a bit of a slow timer in my head about when to escalate. But, now, I'm apparently allowed to just go up to the hottest chick around and do whatever I want.

It just all feels very bizarro universe to me after spending years trying to tighten things down one element at a time. Also, frankly, I'm afraid I might go off and do something really reckless. I don't know. It's just weird.

Any thoughts?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Thomson

Banned
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I like it. You are in very same situation as me. Nowadays people literally expect me to be some superhuman. Everybody just gives the evil look, yet I see they love me. It is like they all love me but somehow someone got jealous to the extent she had to spread bullish about me to others..

And naturally nobody has the gut to come ask with me about it. I have heard very many times that my presence is very devilish.

But it is bound to happen. When there's too much lovers... It seems like lovers turns into haters any given time.

What can I say to you? Really, the only thing and the hardest thing to do is accept whatever you are. It is very easy for us to go on struggling but accepting is very hard.
 

muhnkee

Don Juan
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Thomson said:
It is very easy for us to go on struggling
This is true. I spent a huge portion of my life being a nerdy poor kid who was a bit overweight. It's very hard to have everyone look at me like they're expecting me to do something very cool.

I have some friends in their 20s who still haven't shut up about the fact that I pulled a chick who slapped me in the face. I still cannot seem to explain to them that she only slapped me because her friends were shaming her after she got too busy with me on the dance floor. Once the friends ditched her, she felt free to go back to Plan A. (BTW, ya gotta love the loyalty women show. "I'll shame you. Then I'll abandon you. Make sure you answer my text about how the night went, girlfran!")
 
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