Adding girls on Facebook

[49au]

I have seen guys talking about adding girls they found on POF, and even girls they met IRL and are trying to fvck, as Facebook friends. But it seems that this is actually counter productive and can hurt you?

I know in the past I was very liberal about adding women I was trying to fvck. And in some ways it was good, in that I got plenty of picture comments, wall comments, etc., and it was obvious I was seeing multiple women or at least had multiple women interested in me. So that was good.


But the downside is that it makes it very hard to remain mysterious, aloof, and unavailable. Even if you are not talking to them every day, they are still able to learn a lot about your life and what you are thinking/doing. It doesn't give them a chance to project their BS fantasies onto you.


Currently I am back to spinning plates after an LTR, and none of these girls are my FB friends.


Do you guys think the pros (increased social value both from their interactions with you on FB, as well as them seeing pictures of you with past women and friends) outweigh the cons (diminished mystery/distance/unavailability)?

 

[IShotTheSheriff]

I saw a very good topic here giving a lot of good reasons why NOT to add a hot girl on facebook.

One of the most important things they named was (from my experience) that you dont want to make yourself available all the time. People realy dont value things they can have whenever they want. Everyone can name excamples for this may it be that your girlfrend often annoied you, but once you or she broke up you suddenly missed her like hell or maybe you have just been away for a while and of cause started to muss your girl (and so did she) just because yout could not see her anytime you wanted for a week.

Also you dont want to advocate (at least leo told me thats the word) text communication. Many guys nowerdays think texting or chatting just cant be avoided nowerdays and this is right. But seriously selecting an entry in your phonebook and taking 5 - 10 minutes to call someone is no big deal and can and SHOULD be expected from any girl. Also if she does not have to make an effort to contact you whe will not start to invest into you.

Furthermore it happened to once that i was stuck in the starting phase of a relationship with the girl always just texting and messaging me on FB. Beliefe me - this is rely not satisfying. It also did not evolve any further at some point - I tried to call her one day, the next day she answered me on FB. And I am pretty shure that my "being always available" behavior was one of the main reasons why she never rly braught an investment which again lead to me just nexting her (with a heavy heart i admit) after a while.

So from my experience the cons are rly grave. There might be some pros - but all of them can be achieved even better offline if you ask me. So I go with the conclusion from the topic I mentioned at the beginning - Dont add a girl you are interrested in on FB.

 

[HalfAddict]

I deleted my Facebook, greatest move I have made in my life of recent. How am I to add a girl to Facebook if I simply do not have one?

Now if you want to contact me you must call my phone, or see me in person.. This also been key in weeding out flaky people in general..

 

[Zodiac]

I have a Facebook that I don't have a photo of myself on my Facebook and only add people I know and are true friends with to it (Under 30 friends) or used it to add people I needed to work with in college to.

 

[Solomon]

Facebook only hurt me once and that was with an old hag (38 over the hill)
With the younger chicks-late 20's it build pre-selection and social proof since I'm not the greatest looking guy.

However now a days I keep it do a minimum(I deleted the FB APP from my phone cause i started being nosy again) I'm not on FB and if I am it's no more then 20 minutes a day unless if I'm chatting with someone