Acting vs. Being

[Dryden]

Earlier there was a little post about acting like you are something, and actually being that thing.

I want to say here that they are one and the same.

If you are actually capable of acting in certain way, with a certain mode of feeling, that is actually the definition of being that thing.

 

[Dryden]

In that sense, before when you were still unsure about what you were, the act was also unsure of itself.

 

[SeymourCake]

Acting is done consciously. Being is done subconsciously. Conscious becomes the subconscious over time.

 

[Trunks]

The more important thing is to start from a place where you truly don't give a fudge what ANYONE thinks of you (outside of your boss and the law, obviously) IME, even though I had heard that advice many times in the PUA community, I did not INTERNALIZE it until experiencing the worst kinds of failure, improving, and seeing all the haters I had accrued.

There are two steps to it:
1) Believing in yourself.
2) Being devoted to perfecting a method and getting consistent results.

The problem with PUA is a lot of guys end up being content with number 1 and they stop growing. At that point it stops being confidence and turns into self-deception. Never seek anyone's approval or attention, but do work on social skills, charisma, and exuding sexuality. Some people think "not caring what other people think of you" equals purposely being an ******* for no reason .. that's just the other side of the coin because you are still trying to force the outcome ... and surprise, surprise, most people with an ounce of common sense will just perceive you as an idiot (generally not conducive to getting what you want).

 

[DragonBlood]

Being is a state of mind. It requires about as much effort as breathing.


However, acting requires time, energy and effort. When you are still in the "fake it till you make it" phase you will burn out alot faster trying to catch and work around your insecurities. Acting will also take focus away from other important areas of your life because your head will be so full of techniques and rules there wont be much room up there for anything else.

Whatever hasnt being internalised when you take a break from game, The second you "brain dump" back into the real work all those hamsters in your brain will be busy doing something else and all those old insecurities inside you will be unchecked, exposed again for all to see.

Game is good, but remedy the core issue before embellishing it with game.

 

[RangerMIke]

I do not believe acting is being. I do believe that if you fake it until you make it works to a certain degree.

It is the difference between treating the symptom of a problem and fixing the problem. You can keep putting air in a tire every day or you can just fix the small leak. JMHO.

Fix the problem and you become a natural.... when you know how to act and it's part of your nature you are authentic. TRUST me when I say this... if your goal is to get women... if you are acting women know... they always know. The only wy 'acting' works is because the woman likes you anyway and they appreciate your 'efforts', it does not really work.

If pretending to be confident gets you to walk up to a woman and talk to her then AT LEAST you are in the game. You can not win unless you try... do this enough times and eventually it will work just because the odds are in your favor and you get lucky.

 

[sharkbeat]

You will know the difference between acting vs. being when a woman hits you with a sh1t test you didn't expect.

 

[VladPatton]

Nothing is true until you do it. Until then, it's pure imagination.

 

[Serenity]

The difference between acting and being is feeling. Someone trying to act cool while feeling insecure will be seen as just that, at least by emotionally secure people. Someone feeling cool will act in accordance to how they feel, they will be cool in themselves and will be perceived as such.

Acting takes effort while being does not. Acting is self-deception, a good example is false politeness. Acting polite based on some rationalization when you'd rather tell them to fvck off. That's acting nice while being angry. This is noticable btw, it's insanely hard to control all movements, facial expressions and voice intonation.

Being is simple, because it's just honestly expressing feelings. Women seem to love that, and that's what they see as honesty.