"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Act different due to reputation?

awrarawrar

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Hey guys,

I was jus wondering how one should act in comparision to their reputation. For example, I got the reputation of being a player/****y guy and that I am mean to a lotta people i don't know. Most of this isn't true but I mean I can see how haters come up with it. So basically, since I got that rep, would it be more benificial to me to compliment a girl a lot an kinda build up her ego since she knows im confident/****y already, or will it hurt me an put me in some friend zone instead? More background info - I have been out with her and have good connection.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Tomatoes

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If she knows your rep.....dont start going in there with negs...

I would mix your play a little. Be friendly and curtious then be ****y too. Abit of both
 

Skilla_Staz

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Ignore your reputation. Act however you want. Too many times I hear guys talk about how they have an undeserved reputation. If you want to talk about those, I've got plenty.

-Many people think I'm a stoner. Never done a single drug.

-Many people consider me a player. I'm flattered, but when a girl brings it up, I'm quick to let her know that I'm very picky, and that a player by definition gets with as many girls as he can. Since I'm picky, this doesn't seem plausible.

-Many people think I'm stupid. After talking to me for a while, they realize that I'm probably one of the smartest people they know, I just lack motivation.

-Many people think I'm physically slow. Then they see me run. My 4.5 speed, and my 10.7 100m dash prove how wrong they are.

See, your reputation will be proven wrong after they get to know you. Don't go out of your way to show her that you're not who they say you are. Guys with the "player" reputation still get more action than guys with the "sweet heart" reputation. Why? Girls want to be the one that "tames the beast" so to speak.-
 

awrarawrar

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Ok yea I know what you mean, normally I just be myself, don't really compliment girls unless they deserve it, etc. Im just saying in this instance, since this is a nice girl, would it work to my advantage, since she has that impression of me, to give her a lot of attention, maybe she thinks shes special since I normally am cold to most people except close friends. Also, summer is comin up so we wont be seeing much of each other soon, I was thinking to give a lotta attention since acting aloof or playing hard to get prob wouldnt work since I only have so much time.

Thanks for any input.
 

iLoveCookies

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Your reputation?

rep·u·ta·tion ( P ) noun - The general estimation in which a person is held by the public.

So its what other people think of you ? Who cares what other people think of you, be who you are. Don't go out of your way to be what you are not. Give her compliments if she looks good or is sweet and she is does in fact deserve it. Be nice if you are a nice guy, give her some attitude if you think she is incorrect. Just act the way you would around (but be polite)
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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squirrels

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awrarawrar said:
Ok yea I know what you mean, normally I just be myself, don't really compliment girls unless they deserve it, etc. Im just saying in this instance, since this is a nice girl, would it work to my advantage, since she has that impression of me, to give her a lot of attention, maybe she thinks shes special since I normally am cold to most people except close friends. Also, summer is comin up so we wont be seeing much of each other soon, I was thinking to give a lotta attention since acting aloof or playing hard to get prob wouldnt work since I only have so much time.

Thanks for any input.
If being yourself got you the date, why would you be someone else when you finally GO on the date?
 

awrarawrar

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thanks for the replies, I realized that my post wasn't exactly how things were going, my bad. Actaully I don't act that differently when im with her, except I just give a LOT of implications that I like her and I want her. Usually I will show interest at the beginning and then let them chase, but like I said, time is of the essence so that wouldnt really work for me.

So to re-direct the question, I know girls are usually turned off when a guy shows a lot of interest right? Well, so with the rep of a player and being ****y, would showing a lot of interest be helpful in this case? Well, she does have a bf also and has said to be friends, but still accepts invitations to go out and never tells me to stop flirting (which i do a lot). Yea so she did say LJBF but don't some girls do that to not feel guilty? I know she may just be an AW, but I do like her.
 

Rebound Material

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ahh, I was in the same boat. Ok, so I met this one cute chick that was in 2 of my classes right? She happened to have mentioned that she was just dumped by her BF and so I took the REBOUND advantage. She invited me over to her apt to "study" some human anatomy and some chemistry(ironic combo) and ended up studying eachother. I just want to add that im not the type to just hook up and that was my first experience just hooking up. Later we agreed that I was just a rebound and that we were just "study buddies", but it turned on me when she told me she actually liked me and that she wants to be more than friends with benifits. I got freaked out about the whole idea and began to avoid her calls and her in general. Later I told her that her friend in her class was cute. She then goes and tells her friend that I found her attractive but added "..but he's a player, a.s.s.h.o.l.e., and a JERK." which I am not what so ever just an AFC who happened to have gotten lucky ...You would think that after hearing that about a guy that a girl would stay away from him...No, in fact a week later her friend started showing IOI's toward me. I knew I was a decent looking guy but during that whole time I was cluelss as to why she was so ATTRACTED to me. We then ended up dating and thats when I showed my true AFC colors which later led to my ass getting dumped. Point being, having a rep of being a player/mean ass/Jerk can only help you attract more *****es...This is all from my experience of course.
 
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