"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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ACLU... bunch of sickos.

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wavejams007

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Originally posted by Giovanni Casanova
"The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one's time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all."


H. L. Mencken (1880 - 1956)
This is the truth.

Dakota, where are you getting your info, such as Bush trying to get support for torture?

What people still don't understand is that life can't go on like it did before 9/11.

Everybody criticizes Bush, but has anyone wandered why theree hasn't been another 9/11?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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wavejams007

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Originally posted by whistler
It would be like the communist government in "1984."

We'd spy on our own citizens without representative oversight.

We'd wage endless wars against concepts, which, of course, can't be defeated.

The enemy would become one amorphous mass, and so we don't care how many of them die.

If you were to lodge any complaints about the government's behavior, you'd be labeled anti-American and a friend of the enemy.

Justification for serious actions would shift as necessary.

Fake, pro-government news stories would be supplied to, and aired on, mass media.

Supposedly independent news columnists would be secretly paid to write propaganda.

Previously unbelievable truths, like global warming is not happening or evolution is just an unsupported idea, would become widely accepted.

Citizens would be caught up in meaningless conspiracy theories propagated by a few loud-spoken conspiracy theorists.

The states with the highest intelligence, tax rates, and most history would be labeled the most morally corrupt and least American.

Yeah. That would suck.
pretty well thought out. It sounds like you are attacking the Patriot Act though. What would you suggest to do?
 

whistler

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Originally posted by wavejams007
pretty well thought out. It sounds like you are attacking the Patriot Act though. What would you suggest to do?
Hmm?

No, no. I was just speaking hypothetically.
 

wavejams007

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Interesting though, whistler. I love alternative history.
 

whistler

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Originally posted by wavejams007
Interesting though, whistler. I love alternative history.
You're confusing me. It's an alternative future!

That stuff would never happen, let alone be obvious.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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wavejams007

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Originally posted by whistler
You're confusing me. It's an alternative future!

That stuff would never happen, let alone be obvious.
My bad, you are right. I meant future.
 

Shiftkey

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Originally posted by wavejams007
This is the truth.

Dakota, where are you getting your info, such as Bush trying to get support for torture?

What people still don't understand is that life can't go on like it did before 9/11.

Everybody criticizes Bush, but has anyone wandered why theree hasn't been another 9/11?
You're forgetting that 9/11 happened under Bush's watch. And that terrorism is nothing new.
 

Scrumtulescence

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Originally posted by wavejams007
What people still don't understand is that life can't go on like it did before 9/11.

Everybody criticizes Bush, but has anyone wandered why theree hasn't been another 9/11?
Are you really that mentally retarded? What the fuck IS it with you Bush supporting drones and your lack of any sort of logical comprehension?

Do you realize how much planning went into 9/11? How long that took? You act as though a few years of no terrorist attacks on american soil is some marvelous achievement of homeland security, all the while ignoring entirely how many terrorist attacks we had before 9/11. Would you mind counting them for me? Try wrapping your mind around this concept: just because there have been no terrorist attacks does not mean any were averted that would have otherwise happened if it weren't for Bush? Why don't you try explaining this -- gee, not prepared for another terrorist attack? How could that be under Dear Leader Bush?

Shall we even get into the Bush administration ignoring the warnings of 9/11?

Let me guess.....you're one of those clueless people who still think the Iraq war has something to do with WMDs or Iraq had something to do with 9/11?

Good God, it's scary what so many people in this country can be convinced of so easily.
 

whistler

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We're a lot safer now that we've caught Osama Hussein.
 

Derek Flint

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Originally posted by Scrumtulescence
Are you really that mentally retarded? What the fuck IS it with you Bush supporting drones and your lack of any sort of logical comprehension?

Do you realize how much planning went into 9/11? How long that took? You act as though a few years of no terrorist attacks on american soil is some marvelous achievement of homeland security, all the while ignoring entirely how many terrorist attacks we had before 9/11. Would you mind counting them for me? Try wrapping your mind around this concept: just because there have been no terrorist attacks does not mean any were averted that would have otherwise happened if it weren't for Bush? Why don't you try explaining this -- gee, not prepared for another terrorist attack? How could that be under Dear Leader Bush?

Shall we even get into the Bush administration ignoring the warnings of 9/11?

Let me guess.....you're one of those clueless people who still think the Iraq war has something to do with WMDs or Iraq had something to do with 9/11?

Good God, it's scary what so many people in this country can be convinced of so easily.
More Bull**** from the Bush haters.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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dakota

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" homeland security"
Lets see.. the one big test that homeland security had was katrina.. and clearly they were oerwhelmed in their response to the initial crisis.. one that they KNEW was comming.

As has been said there were no foreign terrorist atacks before OR after 9/11 so one can not say Bush has or has not averted more attacks.

As for the torture issue.. reccently congress was debating legislation that would officially ban tortuture on the part of the US government. Bush threatened to veto the legislation despite it pass overwhelmingly in the Senate.. Basically he wants the CIA still to have a green light to use torture. Europe clearly sees a double standard the US is using... keeping "terrorists" in jails outside the USA with no charges. A parallel could be drawn to the Stalinst gulags of Sibera.
This is what happens... governments start curtailing the freedoms of the few.. and people say.. I am not them. Why should I care. Then soon to counter terrorism all middle easterners need to be registered in the country or sent to camps" outside the USA. and " americans " say.. oh good.. we can't have them blowing things up.. then the government is worried about using their businesses to fund terrorism... and the " middle easterners" start losing property rights.. and the masses go " oh good, we have to stop them".... now replace "middle easterners" with Jews and USA with Germany and "outside the USA" with Poland and what do you have??
 

The Antichrist_Star

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I could have sworn that this was about the ALCU...

...

Right. :)

Closed

AS
 
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