Im young, but I've had a hell of a great life. Starting with great loving parents, lots of friends, and LOTS of opportunities, I consider myself extremely privileged. Yet, I can't escape this feeling, it's been there my entire life. I think its depression, spurred by heavy anxiety. But when I had it earlier, I was placing my happiness on women. Now that I'm past that, having realized I gained no lasting feeling of fulfillment after getting chicks, I have no idea what this feeling is anymore or why it's even there.
I need to move on, make progress, and escape this damn shadow that feels like its following me everywhere. But I don't know how to start. I don't even know what I want anymore other than to be happy. Seriously, I just don't get it, I have everything I could ever want in my life right now...how could I still be so down, even when I'm actively trying to be positive. The best way I can describe what I'm feeling is : "....ok, now what? I;ve been so privileged and fortunate for all my life, I have everything I need...so What's it all for???"
sorry if I'm rambling, I just can't take this anymore.
I need to move on, make progress, and escape this damn shadow that feels like its following me everywhere. But I don't know how to start. I don't even know what I want anymore other than to be happy. Seriously, I just don't get it, I have everything I could ever want in my life right now...how could I still be so down, even when I'm actively trying to be positive. The best way I can describe what I'm feeling is : "....ok, now what? I;ve been so privileged and fortunate for all my life, I have everything I need...so What's it all for???"
sorry if I'm rambling, I just can't take this anymore.