"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Accursed impulsivity!

IBreatheSpears

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So, I've been talking to this girl from Tinder and things were going well. She was supposed to come to my town with friends today and then I was going to steal her, but she was hungover and they decided not to go. So, I sent an fb message inviting her to come this Wednesday instead and she said she couldn't because of her job... but the tone she said it in gave me a flaky vibe and I decided to NEXT her. About a millisecond after I unfriended her she says she can come on the weekend. Too late. I can still communicate with her -- I have her number and her snapchat and I can still send fb messages as a non-friend -- but I'm wondering what the best course of action is: wait for her to contact me? act like nothing happened? pretend it was a mistake? wait a few days and then message her? tell the truth? I'd really like to date her but I might have sabotaged my own chances. Sure, there are other girls, but I like this one and I don't want to give up juuust yet.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Turuwal

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Ah the perils of following the strict no contact protocol. My protocol recently has been to go no contact without deleting the contact - especially with tinder where you need the contact for them to communicate with you. A surprising number of women will re-initiate even if you think the ball has gone completely out of play.
 

sylvester the cat

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she gave you a counter offer so what's the problem? don't mention that you unfriended her unless she brings it up. if she does, just say you don't remember or make out it was her who did it.
 

IBreatheSpears

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sylvester the cat said:
she gave you a counter offer so what's the problem? don't mention that you unfriended her unless she brings it up. if she does, just say you don't remember or make out it was her who did it.
We were talking on FB when I did it, and the counter-offer came right after I hit "Unfriend". Should I continue messaging her on FB as though nothing's happened?

Turuwal said:
Ah the perils of following the strict no contact protocol. My protocol recently has been to go no contact without deleting the contact
Heh, yeah, I need to work on the impulsiveness. It frequently gets me into trouble with girls -- like the time I tried to tip a girls drink so that a tiny bit would splash on her, misjudged it (drunk) and tipped the entire thing down her. The weird thing is she actually apologised to me for having stolen my hat earlier and my inner beta got the better of me and I got all supplicating like "No, it's okay, no need to apologise". I suspect that if I'd acted aloof and asked for a date, I might've still wrangled it. Her friend had told me she liked me.
 

El Payaso

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Act ignorant. Act cool. Just agree to the date then Ask her why she unfriended you. She'll be like I didn't unfriend you. Say "strange" them just add her back again. :)
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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IBreatheSpears

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El Payaso said:
Act ignorant. Act cool. Just agree to the date then Ask her why she unfriended you. She'll be like I didn't unfriend you. Say "strange" them just add her back again. :)
I'm going with this. Here's what I sent:
Saturday's good for me, I have plans in the evening but I can bring you along, just means you'll have to be judged by my friends
Probably could've added a ****y wink at the end to lighten the tone but whatever, I'm learning. A minute ago I sent another girl "ttyl alligator" and laughed at myself for a minute straight when I realised how retarded it sounds.
 

Albatross953

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Don't even bring it up unless she mentions it. And when she does its no big deal.
 

IBreatheSpears

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Albatross953 said:
Don't even bring it up unless she mentions it. And when she does its no big deal.
Will do.

She hasn't replied yet but Idk if she's still online since I can't tell any more. Also, that message could have gone to her Other box in which case she most likely wouldn't see it. I know that usually happens when people you aren't friends with message you but I'm not sure if it's the same when you've already been conversing. Probably should've texted her. If she doesn't reply by tomorrow I'll drop her a text asking if she saw it.
 

IBreatheSpears

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She replied with "haha". I sent back "...". Guess that wraps this story up.
 
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