Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

About What Gets Posted Here

SexPDX

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Dudes,

I have been around here the last couple days looking at some of the advice and tips. There is gold to be found on these boards and there are a number of guys contributing who I think are really cool. But unfortunately, the gold is burried under rumble and it's becoming harder and harder to find. Some stuff is good but a lot of what is posted here is sh1t, ACF sh1t to be emphatic about it.

The unfortunate thing that I have learned in the last couple years is that game is VERY hard to articulate over the internet. Yes, it's easy for some people to articulate the IMPRESSION of game to people who have no basis for judgement IRL as to what game really is, but real game is hard to grasp on the boards in actuality. That is why experienced posters often get frustrated with contributing as did Mystery on ASF years ago before he started focusing on teaching what he does IRL.

Although, the problem is particularly bad here, it is not a problem UNIQUE to here. In my time on mASF in the past, I noticed guys who start more threads on techniques theory than I EVER would think of starting myself who I KNOW were virgins because they admitted they were on the boards.

The truth is, you don't know if the guys you get advice from are any good at picking up chicks. Before you even get to that, you don't know if you got them on the phone could they hold a decent conversation and speak clearly and with structure. You don't know if you would be comfortable sitting on the barstool next to them chatting over a beer.

I have been fortunate in my experiences meeting people from the boards. These guys have had game or at least had good rapport building skills which could serve as the foundation for the develoment of game. Jake Steed and Broadband from this forum are both cool guys. The guys who I have met from mASF are cool too. I acquire rapport with people in general quite easily, and usually if I can't get along with someone and have trouble connecting looking them in the face and talking to them they are long way from game.

So.....you are wondering what solution I have to offer on this situation besides ranting about it, right?

When you read posts here, try to get (as much as you can online) an overall sense of how you believe this person formed his ideas. Is he a newbie who has been reading the posts and talks like he knows more than he does? Or has he done some reading, applied the material and is speaking from his own observations? Also, try not to BE the first one of those. If you don't have the experience or don't fully understand the context of the question (that may be because the question wasn't specific or well formed enough in some cases) then just don't reply. People who know LESS than you will read that and form their own ideas based on YOUR misconceptions.

Another piece of advise...MEET GUYS IN REAL LIFE! It's fun to see how a peson's RL personality matches up with your online imrpession, I have been told it's vastly different in my case. Not just guys from these boards (although DO that whenever you have the opportunity, it's nice to add a human connection to the posts you read) but seek out guys in the game IRL. Most guys who have lots of women interested in them are cool guys who are eager to make friends if you present yourself as a confident individual who has no problem introducing himself. Best of all, you get to SEE game instead of reading about it.

Cheers!

-PDX
 

Chubbs Peterson

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Normally I hate to be a cheerleader on these message boards, but this is something I am in complete agreement with. Particularly the part about observing "game" in the real world.

Not to get into my personal background, but after being in the dating game for a while, I kept wondering why I continually would fail with females. So I went on a quest for self improvement, one of the components of which was finding this site. Additionally, I was fortunate enought to meet guys who were EXCEPTIONALLY successful with women.

One's a pretty boy, free-spirited artist type, the other is more working class, type-A personality.

Both are COMPLETELY different types of guys, and don't know each other, but they both get girls. I have watched these guys in action and they share certain key moves and attitudes when dealing with females. Since meeting these fellas, I've personally incorporated a little of their personalities and gestures, etc. whenever I am in social settings and/or meeting women.

Knowing these guys has helped me tremendously.
 

thecraftylefty

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I agree completely with SexPDX. He said it all, go out there and meet some people. It can only help. I'm definitely going to start meeting some people IRL now.

"If your rap is strong it can't go wrong."

thecraftylefty
 

George Gordon

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This is the best advice! I've taken this route myself--Read the Bible and befriend Alpha Males!

I've been aquainted with an Alpha Male, and after educating myself with the Bible I realised things about him and started to hangout with him more. I've been hopping between this material and him, always discovering how he uses the ideas from the Bible (and elsewhere) and the experimenting and applying. Always amazed.

And the really amazing thing is that he's learned everything in the Bible through experience. He uses on-the-fly patterns, echoing, mirroring, ****y-funny and more; every negotiation and persuasive tactic I've learnt by reading; has seemingly instant rapport with people and always interacts through the individual person's map of the world. This is the son of a farmer who has never read a book in his entire life! He seems to do this all by habit and doesn't really know what he is doing, BUT he definitely understands what he is doing. This guy is extremely short; probably 5'5, average looking, on-going battle with alcohol, but his eye-contact is incredibly intense; gives off an awesome 'in control vibe'. Women crumble before him, always. He loves ALL women, and will bed 5-10s. Strange. He's not a jerk and he's not a nice guy; he is the greatest, natural Don Juan I have ever and probably will ever meet.

!GEORGE GORDON!
 

De La Soul

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Right on, Nick.

No more regurgitated bullshyt.

I have to agree with you about real-life meetings being very important (although I say it cautiously because I've never met anyone from this board IRL, although I do discuss seduction with some outside the board). I've learnt more about BUILDING RAPPORT (warmth), KINO, EYE CONTACT, TONALITY and general CONVERSATION SKILLS from real life than from any internet site.

For those sorts of things - basically things that are difficult to get the feel of from words on a screen - there really is no substitute for being able to observe how it's done. I'm lucky, in that I've been able to look to an amazingly charasmatic cousin of mine for guidance on rapport building and conversation, one close mate of mine who's great at bringing out the sexual feeling (he oozes sexuality! I've told him that. LOL) and another who's just extremely confident with women full stop.

If you don't have mates like this, don't dump your current mates, but build up some new connections of cool guys who have great style. Chat with them. Hang out with them. You really learn a whole lot this way.

Alternatively, I'm sure it'd be great to take a seduction workshop or do a message board-meet up, to get some ideas.

The very process of SEEING a guy approach a girl full of swagger can be an eye-opening one, and could possibly change your perspective on the pick-up.

As I've said before, PDX, maybe when you come out my way we'll meet up and I'll show you around... I'll just have to lose my anonimity complex first. :D

- De La
 

much2learn

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Originally posted by SexPDX
Dudes,

I have been around here the last couple days looking at some of the advice and tips. There is gold to be found on these boards and there are a number of guys contributing who I think are really cool. But unfortunately, the gold is burried under rumble and it's becoming harder and harder to find. Some stuff is good but a lot of what is posted here is sh1t, ACF sh1t to be emphatic about it.



Amen! But the good side to this is that it has encouraged me to spend less time on this board. When I first found this place, it was Columbus discovering America all over again. The truths that I learned here were like a drug-induced high. As the signal-to-noise ratio has degraded that high has diminished.

The truth is, you don't know if the guys you get advice from are any good at picking up chicks. Before you even get to that, you don't know if you got them on the phone could they hold a decent conversation and speak clearly and with structure. You don't know if you would be comfortable sitting on the barstool next to them chatting over a beer.
PDX, I've seen you use this word "structure" before in reference to conversation. How exactly do you define structured conversation? Could you provide an example?
 

Lionheart

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True.

I guess I am kinda guilty of this, as I don't have much game, however it is improving.

I know the theory as well, I am good at psychology and understanding people and motives, plus I can 'read between the lines', I think despite this, some of the advice I give is good advice though.

Some of the fundamental 'truths' in the bible, occured to me quite naturally, but I never put them into practise because of our feminized society, this board cleared up a few probs for me and told me basically that it's ok to be a man! ;)

That's good advice from PDX be careful what you believe online, as you don't know the people, it could be some complete no-hoper who has never had a girl who is giving you sex tips!

Lionheart.
 

Bungo Pony

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Originally posted by SexPDX
When you read posts here, try to get (as much as you can online) an overall sense of how you believe this person formed his ideas. Is he a newbie who has been reading the posts and talks like he knows more than he does? Or has he done some reading, applied the material and is speaking from his own observations? Also, try not to BE the first one of those. If you don't have the experience or don't fully understand the context of the question (that may be because the question wasn't specific or well formed enough in some cases) then just don't reply. People who know LESS than you will read that and form their own ideas based on YOUR misconceptions.
One thing that I usually like to look at is how long the person's been around the boards, and how many posts they've actually made. A lot of times, this will show in the quality of the post, and how much sense it makes.

However, I've been recently seeing people who've been around here a long time make typical newbie posts "I Give Up" or "I Am Such An AFC". A lot of times, these posts are just whiny. They've been here for a long time, and have not completely changed their mindset. In effect, they've been faking confidence, thinking that it will be a quick fix to get women. It involves a LOT of work developing the mindset you need to succeed in life.

I also noticed a while back that this place was flooded with tons of AFC posts and AFC advice to back it up. One thing that I find sad is that people read posts by Pook, Antidump, and many others out of the DJ bible, and notice that they are almost worshipped here, and the newbie would also like some of that glory. The people who's posts are in the DJ bible made it there, not from just writing a well thought-out tip, but have actually applied what they've learned.
 

MilesDude

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Soooo true

Hey Nick, thanks for the great thoughts, I totally agree. I have been on this site for quite some time now and know that my game has improved significantly IRL because of this site. Most times I read posts and do find that the majority of them have been covered before in pretty much the same ways. My biggest rant and complaint is that people are so quick to post their situations and ask for advice, without using the "search" function first....it works wonders!

I read a lot of posts that are similar to what you said say, "She gave me eye contact, what should I do?" or "What should I do on the first date?" and I usually don't respond.

It's so bad that I usually only read one thing that is of value on either the "Discussion Topics" or "Tips" sections. Hmmm...working game, I'm out....

Miles
 

vectorz

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Los Angeles

Cool.. I agree. Anyone in Los Angeles area wanna meet up?
 

prosemont

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About a week ago, I noticed so many great posts that I started a short thread entitled "Sosuave Renaissance;" HOWEVER, in just a short week I almost wrote another post saying NEVERMIND because the number of piss poor posts far exceeded the good ones.

Only a handful of guys consistently give good advice and, frankly, I now only do a search for them and ignore all the other garbage. They’re good because they give the type of advice that would not show up on an inexperienced person’s radar screen. It’s hard to explain, but I know it when I see it. Call it insight.

THEN, you have the Bible regurgitation crowd some of whom, by their own admission, have almost no experience. At least one of these guys is an extremely frequent poster with thousands of posts and even a "fan base." While some of his posts are well written, it’s really all just rehash. There’s no substance behind his posts because there is NO INSIGHT.

I suppose it is possible for someone with NO GAME to still give good advice or be motivational not unlike Machiavelli himself who, while not royalty or even well known in political circles at the time, was able to write The Prince. Because he had little or no actual experience doesn’t make that writing any less instructive. I get the feeling that one of the famous posters on this site is a scrawny geek, but some of his writings are useful in one way or another. Sort of like a basketball coach who can’t play the game at all but is able to dispense valuable advice.

BUT, if you are someone who has no game, any advice you give damn well better be spectacular. Most of the morons on this site dispensing advice or cute little witticisms should simply shut the fvck up – all their self-gratifying does nobody any good.

It is one thing to flesh out your own thoughts on this site for your own benefit and to get some response to that, it is quite another to intimate that you actually know what you're talking about.

Finally, for those of you who post out of ego boost, knock it off. If you think you are gaining notoriety or getting some type of identity or ego boost or you think you are gaining “credibility” by posting on a website, you are a fvcking loser.
 
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Unruly4Me

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Re: Re: About What Gets Posted Here

Originally posted by Bungo Pony
One thing that I usually like to look at is how long the person's been around the boards, and how many posts they've actually made. A lot of times, this will show in the quality of the post, and how much sense it makes.
That, my friend, is sooo not true. A post count is NEVER a sign of actual knowledge. Perhaps that guy has asked a ton of questions and is still doing so. Maybe he has been here forever, because he is really a fake DJ and this board helps him think he really is one. Maybe he has been here for years and is still trying to get it.

I can't remember who it was, but someone with hundreds of posts acted completely AFC a while back and I told him I could not believe he had been here so long and knew so little.

What each of you need to do is not pay much attention to what anyone posts her until you know from reading lots of their posts that they know what they are talking about. Once you get to the point of trying to overcome being an AFC you start to grasp an understanding of what a REAL DJ is like. You may not be one yet, but you will know enough about the game to recognize someone who does. Here are some things to look for that may help you tell...

Does the person sound unique and different? This is important because a good DJ will have his own style and it will show.

Do they talk about attitude and mindsets? This is important because any good DJ knows that the right frame of mind is MUCH more valuable than a pattern or right tonality.

Do they still ask for help here and what kind of help? This is important, because a good DJ is one who is still eager to learn more and perfect their skills. If they only post when they feel the need to "play daddy" they are probably not as good as you think they are. In summary, the guys who "act" like they know it all probably do not.

Are they posting a lot here at night, especially on weekends? Show me a good DJ who is home on Friday and Saturday night posting on internet message boards and I will show you a pig that can fly.

Again, some people have said that you cannot really tell who is good and who isn't. I don't agree with that at all, because if you are smart and have some understanding of the game you will be able to choose who you listen to and who you don't. Again, post count is not a smart way to make that determination.

Cheers.

P.S. Try spending your time reading more articles than posts, because I think it will make your time here much more productive.
 

DoubleA

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A take on it....

I recently started posting on DJ last month. I began to really enjoy the feedback that I recieved for posting interesting topics like "DJing doesn't work...in the DC area." It was great. I was able to catch input from cats who were in my situation and gave awesome advice.

But recently, I have been called away by the duties of life. Especially, in the dept of dealing with these women out here. And tell you guys, tomorrow I turn 29, it seems like one great big giant rollercoaster that doesn't stop to let you hurl. I still experiment with clubs, bars, and for some reason have chicks from back in the day TRY to "pop" back into my life. I see it moreso as living life, gaining experience, and growing as a person.

Upon coming back onto the board I too have noticed alot a new jacks posting...wanting quick answers...short cuts if you will. Pathetic. I am in my late 20's and I TOOK THE TIME TO READ THE BIBLE. READ IT. Guys, stop answering these clowns if they ask questions that can easily answered by reading the BIBLE. I mean come on. If they can read, then they can formulate their own opinion.

Besides whose to say that you have to agree with the BIBLE...like the original theological BIBLE...take out of it what you can and pertains to you. Who's to say that you'd actually agree with what's written and said. But they won't know until they gain an opinion. I been through enough itshay with these broads ( 5's thru 9's) that I really NOT looking for a GF/wife. I have experience numerous heartbreaks, setbacks, and let downs in my life without women. Therefore, I have the best teacher there is...EXPERIENCE.

Stop bailing these guys out. Especially, the topic ...(hurtful voice).."My GF left me...". Stop it. I was there at one time, we all have been there. Give these dudes a chance to experience LIFE in their own way. And deal with their PAIN the same. The advice that a DJ who plays ball for his University or College will not be the same as a dude who is Joe Average on campus. It's like square pegs in circular holes...it doesn't fit. The same goes for a short guy to take advice from some dude who tall. Nope. Because the advice that is given is based on the experience from actually being that indivdual. The short guy isn't the guy whose 6'3. He's 5'4. So instead he has to come to up with his own Method of DJism.

I don't like to see any dude get dusted by someone they cared about. We were all AFC's once. If you feel u wanna take a new jack under ur wing and help your fellow DJ brother through their time of need. Do it. I would. It's advice it's free. He don't have to take it but it's there. I really like the idea of DJs getting together, offline, sharing ideas, and techniques. Kind of like the Shaolin Monks..........well not exactly. You know what I mean. They'll get the feedback they'll need without unknowingly posting the same topic that was posted the day before but reworded or a different scenario with the names changed.

I keep my post to a minimum, but I do read alot of the forum. I like seeing you guys realize that we as men or women, or human beings more importantly grow and keep growing. And that's what's important in life. Growing. Not physically but mentally. Learing from others mistakes. It's beautiful. But if they post and haven't taken the time to read the BIBLE, to formulate an opinion of their own, on a dilemna that could easily be solved by reading it....don't respond, I say.

Peace to "Mr. Perfect" Curt Henning and The 7 lost in sky. May they rest in peace.

-Rollo..."What's up, My real name is Aaron. I'm a DJ in the making, and I am a still growing."
 

Bungo Pony

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That, my friend, is sooo not true. A post count is NEVER a sign of actual knowledge. Perhaps that guy has asked a ton of questions and is still doing so. Maybe he has been here forever, because he is really a fake DJ and this board helps him think he really is one. Maybe he has been here for years and is still trying to get it.
Since you've only been here since January, and have only made 102 posts, I disregard anything you're saying.......Just Kidding :)

Maybe I worded it wrong, but the point I was trying to make was to put the pieces together - the number of posts, the length they've been here, and the quality of the post. It's also good to read the responses, and see if anyone adds more insight to the subject, or says "That is so AFC!! RTFB!!"

I know one thing for sure, sometimes I have to double check if I'm reading a post from a newbie, or from an experienced DJ, since I myself have been here so friggin' long. Someone who has a damn good number of posts under their belt is MOST LIKELY to be one who is still starving to learn, and also someone to learn from.

There are a few who ruin this (name Tristania comes to mind) who posted one lined responses just to become a Master Don Juan, but his date of registry proved that he was not very experienced. That title doesn't mean 5hit if you don't have the experience to show that you are worthy of that title.
 

Unruly4Me

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me too, Rollo

Rollo - My birthday is also tomorrow and I will be 28. Happy birthday!

Bungo Pony - I agree with you to an extent, but I would put a STRONG emphasis on the number of quality posts the guy has made. If he just responds to lots of threads, but never offers anything others can learn from he is likely not legit. :)

Cheers.
 

DoubleA

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I think that's where paying attention to the forum comes in. As the saying goes..."Game recognizes game." And yes a one word post surely a Don Juan doesn't make. As far as that goes...people are selective by nature. They hear what they want to hear. As far as those clowns who do that, no one in particular I know of, let them be. They're talking loud and saying nothing. I think most who post here can think for themselves...I hope. :)
 

Slickster

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I ran across this post doing a search and I think that it holds true even more today.

So I'm bumping it up in hopes that some may learn.
 

squirrels

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Originally posted by SexPDX
I noticed guys who start more threads on techniques theory than I EVER would think of starting myself who I KNOW were virgins because they admitted they were on the boards.
This is why I kinda shudder when people IM me for advice.

I try to leave an "out" when I'm not sure.

Take ANY advice you get on here with a grain of salt. I've seen it a lot too...people who come on here with all of TWO posts regurgitating Bible ideas like they were their own. I try not to do that.
 
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