AAAAArgh What the HELL is happening to me!!!

[Rudy_TubeSteak]

That's is I am so sick of it. I blew so many chances and you know why??? I am being a friggin wussy.

Here is how I see it...I climb up this big huge diving tower. No ropes, no gear. Just bare fingers and hardly any light to see where I am going. The surface is either rough and sharp or slippery. Below me are sharp spikes that will impale me. BUT...i do get to the top. Wow, big achievement...and now to finish it off I only have to jump off and land in water, a sure thing that I will be safe and alive.....Now I am frozen, unable to move a muscle. Never going to jump off. Stuck and now just wasted all that effort.

I've met and attracted (I think) many girls but I just can get the moneymaker. I get right to that moment and then I blow it big time. When I do its because I am drunk with no inhibition. Whenever I am out I am always seen with girls. A lot of ppl think I am ***king these girls but I havent at all.

I have well right up to the point but can't seem to finish it off.

E.G. There is this girl, let's call her HBCranky, who I have kissed previously and I also work with her. Sometimes she is *****y towards me at work, but I still get on and be nice to everyone including her. I asked her what she is up to after work and then we decided to meet up at the diner (4am). So me and this other girl, HBWelsh, took off to the diner to meet with her. BTW HBWelsh is another workmate of mine but she has a BF somewhere but she is my social proof, wingwoman and generally someone to make other girls jealous. HBCranky, HBWelsh and I have a feed at the diner and decided to take off.

When me and HBWelsh took off, she mention that me and HBCranky would be good together yet the AFC in me disagreed with her. HBCranky has limited expressions lol like never smiles much, voice tone never changes and such but HBWelsh is good at picking things up and reckons HBCranky is so into me.

And as HBWelsh said (she was right!), HBCranky actually called me right after I dropped off HBWelsh. (4:30am). We met up at the carwash and talked over there while she cleaned up her car.

When she finished she sat down and I moved towards her. Commented about her hair (Damn I actually did the kiss test), touched her hair and the outline of her ears. We exchanged glances but NOOOOO I had to fiddle around until her friend's BF arrive and the moment ruined. Then the 3 of us talked about bullsh*t topics...killing all chance I had with HBCranky. It was getting really late and we all took off home. Lol I wasnt sure if HBCranky saw me slamming the steering wheel as I drove off.

HBWelsh says that what I did will make her even more keen. I don't think I fumbled I just didn't do the finishing touches.

I was talking to HBCrank's close friend a while back and says that HBCranky is very secretive about her men and who she likes. She does'nt even see HBCranky in action much anyway. She was even surprised about some of the stuff HBCranky was doing when we first made out....

This is only one of my many examples of the ones that got away. DAMMIT I am still kicking myself over a lot of missed opportunities.

 

[Rudy_TubeSteak]

Looking deeper into the issue, why does a person sabotage his own chance with a woman. Or why wont he do something that is beneficial for himself?

 

[El MonoLoco]

Its your own programming dude.....After years of doing things one way its gonna be hard to change. You have to work at it. Don't be so hard on yourself, you are obviously improving or you wouldn't even notice the things you are doing wrong.....

Here is how I see it...I climb up this big huge diving tower. No ropes, no gear. Just bare fingers and hardly any light to see where I am going. The surface is either rough and sharp or slippery. Below me are sharp spikes that will impale me. BUT...i do get to the top. Wow, big achievement...and now to finish it off I only have to jump off and land in water, a sure thing that I will be safe and alive.....Now I am frozen, unable to move a muscle. Never going to jump off. Stuck and now just wasted all that effort.

You are thinking too much here man.....And no your effort wasn't wasted, because any progress is a good thing.
Using your own analagy.....
You should be thinking about taking the leap from lower places. Climb a bit and jump, climb a little higher and try again. Eventually the top doesn't seem so bad because not 10-15ft below that things were easy.....Does that makes sense?????


Just keep working at it and you will see results. Once you get your old mental programming out of your head and start replacing it with your new one things will get better.

 

[Tomatoes]

You are seeing where you are going wrong.....Good

You are beating yourself up about it.....Bad


You could look at the boot camp on this site. That might help.

You seem to have game but not confiedence. I used to be the same. A girl would give me a line and i would have the perfect line to say back to vibe with her but i would say something boring like yeah, no, maybe. Things take time to change but you cant beat yourself up over it. Just try not to piss about next time. When you feel you are wavering remember how pissed off you were about MISSING your chance. Your mind will then think heh well making a move has got to be better than that. Even if it fails.

 

[Rudy_TubeSteak]

Yes I am going to keep on going no matter how bad I f*ck it up but more importantly do better than previous. What have I got to lose.

And I think a DJ Bible refresher would be a great thing to do.